<p>I have a nephew marrying his SO after 8 years together, 2 cohabitating during grad school. This is a relationship started as hs seniors, grown over 4 years of college apart, and in every way a happy healthy union. </p>
<p>S1 dated a great girl until Mom decided there would be no dating as it was “distracting to her goals, he’s a great guy for her, but it just can’t happen now”. This girl is still alone, as are all her siblings who have similarly jettisoned good matches on mom’s insistance. They are all very talented/successful but very much socially connected to their parents, not their peers. </p>
<p>S2 has dated an awesome girl for 2.5 years and they will both be going to the same school. Did that influence their decision? I’m sure it did, and I think they have a right for it to. It didn’t influence their career goals, which is what matters to me. They are quite clearly in it for the long haul and would make that work regardless of location. They make each other better people. </p>
<p>I certainly get the OP’s aggravation, but at some point you just can’t be managing your semi-adult children this way. Even paying tuition doesn’t give you that right, and you’ll only damage YOUR relationship in the process.</p>