<p>I was thinking the same thing. Do they have an honors college? Would she be happy there in every other aspect? You may get good merit $$ from the school if she has better scores then what they are used to seeing. Most schools have either an honors college or some sort of president’s or dean’s group of selet kids that want to attend, but be in a higher level for classes…doesn’t hurt to check it out further! Also, do they have enough other choices for majors if she decides to switch to something else related or unrelated.</p>
<p>mdmom: my older daughter is attending a school like you describe; yes, it comes with challenges but this is a very individual, personal decision…</p>
<p>for her, it works because the program she is in has the top stats kids who apply…</p>
<p>2flipper2: I too have heard stories of Jewish students not happy at Elon; I can definitely see a certain type of kid uncomfortable…I think it really depends on what the particular student has been exposed to in their teen years; someone who comes from a “very Jewish area” of NewYork (I’m thinking Long Island or Westchester) may not have ever been exposed to any NON-Jewish people to begin with…if they have attended Jewish summer camps, have not travelled alone with non-Jewish kids and have basically had all Jewish friends growing up, it’s going to be weird…it’s a very individual decision…</p>
<p>again, it comes down to “fit”…each person’s fit is different</p>
<p>My older daughter is at Syracuse, btw…and she actually has felt uncomfortable because of the overwhelming number of Jewish students who hail from Long Island; they all seem to know each other, pledge sororities/frats together, have mutual friends etc…dress alike…don’t want to be friends with kids from other areas…</p>
<p>2flipper-I know a Jewish freshman from Long Island (fairly active in Jewish community but attended public school) at Elon who loves it there. Clearly, a visit is warranted along with a discerning eye toward what is important to a particular student.</p>
<p>RVM: I was thinking along the same lines as Rodney about why some Jewish kids aren’t happy at Elon. I think that it would be difficult for a Jewish kid from a predominately Jewish area or Jewish day school to acclimate to a southern school like Elon. I can think of 2 Jewish girls from our HS who went to Elon; one loves it and one transferred to UMCP. My niece attends UNC and had a similar experience as the one described with meeting people who had never met a Jew before, but it doesn’t bother her. Her Dad is not Jewish and she attended a diverse HS so she’s comfortable in that enviroment. Most of her friends are not Jewish, but she is going on a Carolina Hillel trip over winter break. I think it really comes down to how comfortable your son will feel in a primarly Christian environment. </p>
<p>Mdmom: It sounds like you need to research the school more. I find that the SAT/ACT breakdowns on the college board website under “How do I stack up are helpful.” I think that a student can thrive at a school where they are in the top 25 percentile, but I would avoid a school with few kids around the same level. A lot of schools use merit money and honors programs to attract kids with higher stats, and generally kids who take advantage of those opportunites are satisfied.</p>
<p>2flipper2 - I wanted to reflect on your post before responding further. I think Rodney makes excellent points - a student coming from a very Jewish area of NY might experience some culture shock at Elon - or any similar school - with 5-10% of the population being Jewish. Did this student attend a Jewish day school in NY? If so, I can see where there might be some transition issues. Did this student participate in any Hillel activities and try to meet other Jewish students? To an extent - the student may need to bear some of the responsibility for not making an effort to meet people, make friends and participate in Hillel. It seems to me that it is a 2-way street.</p>
<p>Case in point - I attended Lafayette in the 80s - and my roommate was from the Princeton, NJ area and had never met a Jew before. But we became great friends - stay in touch to this day. She actually married a Jewish guy! and I attended their wedding. So, the fact that this young man’s roommates had not met a Jew before is not in and of itself necessarily a problem - unless they respond with antisemitism.</p>
<p>I understand that there is a difference between the administration at Elon and the student body. From the extensive research I have done, I am 100% confident that the administration fully supports Jewish life at Elon. There will be a dedicated Hillel House in the near future. The Jewish population at Elon is increasing every year - it is not a stretch to say that Elon wants Jewish students. As far as the student body goes - I think we all know that you can encounter bigots anywhere - at any college - not just in the south. I am not in any way convinced, however, that there is a problem of any magnitude at Elon in terms of how the student body treats Jewish students. I’m sorry that this young man is having a bad experience - but for now - I see him as an outlier - rather than a representative sample.</p>
<p>Thanks for all of the suggestions. I have gone through the schools website and they do have an honors college, that based on the requirements listed, my D would be admitted. However, as I dug around some more, I found the list of students who had graduated from the honors college by year and the highest number of students was 16. This is out of a class size of 1500 kids. And in most years there weren’t any graduates of the honors college from the school that she would be in. I think I will keep this school in the back of my mind during the year, but I am not sure it’s the right fit for her.</p>
<p>Sheesh, now I’m going to start worrying about Elon and Charleston, too?</p>
<p>My D (who lives on LI and goes to a Jewish Day School) went on a community service trip to Peru for the summer, with a number of non-Jewish kids. She got on great with them and in fact two came to visit and stay at our house recently. But my D told me about a time on the trip when one very bright girl from Memphis routinely and unthinkingly referred to Israel as Palestine. (not drawing a distinction between the Palestinians and Israel, but simply calling the whole area Palestine. That was, she explained, how it had always been referred to where she lived). It really jarred my D and she tried to explain (mostly in vain) to the friend that the implication of calling it Palestine. Jewish or not, supporter or not, that would just not happen in the NY metro area or most of the East Coast.</p>
<p>Rockvillemom - When you visited Elon did you meet with any students over at Hillel? I think you mentioned going back for another visit. Maybe setting up a meeting between some kids at Hillel and your S would be a good idea. Then he can get an idea of what it is like to be Jewish there from kids who are experiencing it.</p>
<p>mhc: lol…keep repeating my mantra…it’s not my kid, it’s not my kid…</p>
<p>on the note of mdmom: my daughter met alot of the Hillel kids the last time she visitied as well; as well as alot of non-Jewish kids…did not experience any of what has been posted…but if she is accepted, she knows that there may be people there who have never met a Jewish person; she is actually looking forward to the challenge…</p>
<p>Almost all college are primarily Christian, as is the United States. I think the vast majority of Jewish kids understand that and want simply to be accepted by all students in an atmosphere not dominated by any one faith or with a common assumption that everyone is is of one faith. I think a significant number want a reasonable opportunity to date within the faith and a smaller number want a good Hillel experience.</p>
<p>Although Bible Belt Southerners tend to make more public affirmations of their faith than is common elsewhere, and many Catholic colleges are not surprisingly overwhelmingly Catholic in population, I think the vast majority of kids will be happy at alomost any college and can handle a well meaning comment or two about not having met a Jewish person previously. </p>
<p>I have not visited Elon or met any students from there and can understand parental concern being heightened by its Western Carolina location and heavy fraternity presence. Nonetheless, I suspect there are many schools where you are more at risk of being shunned because of your clothes or looks than you are of being shunned at Elon because of your religion.</p>
<p>mdmom - we are planning to visit Elon again in April and I do plan to set up an opportunity for my son to meet with one or more Jewish students there and hear their experiences. My son lives in his BBYO t-shirts - he must have 30+ of them. I am going to have him wear a such a t-shirt for this visit and see what type of reactions it generates - if any. (He has one with the Nike swoosh symbol that says “Just Jew It” - maybe that would be too much? )</p>
<p>My niece’s best friend is from a small town in NC. When she met my neice she said that she was “thrilled” because she had never met a Jewish person before. She visited last year and really enjoyed celebrating Hanukah. I think in some ways my neice enjoys the novelty of being the out of state Jew. As others have said, it depends on the kid.</p>
<p>I have heard that Elon feels less southern than other NC schools because they have a large percentage of students from the mid-atlantic and northeast.</p>
<p>I think there are many kids from towns with no Jews who have read of Jews in Bible class, or seen one of the many tv or movie performers who talk a lot about their being Jewish (Seinfeld, Sandler, Stewart, Allen, Silverman, etc) who sincerely want to meet their first Jewish person for totally benign reasons.</p>
<p>I suspect there are a lot of Jewish kids who have similar feelings about blacks, kids from foreign countries, or, if they watch Big love on HBO, Mormons.</p>
<p>momjr - very good point. Elon draws substantially from Mass., NJ, NY and MD - it’s not really a “southern” school in the strictest sense of the word. Elon is also becoming more Jewish with each passing year - so the odds of being the only Jewish kid on your hall or floor are diminishing. I still feel very comfortable with Elon - but will certainly continue to collect information and will also post after our next visit in April.</p>
<p>First visit to the thread today and I missed the brief Westboro Baptist discussion. WBC will make a stop at Brandeis before heading to Harvard and, according to their website, this is the purpose of their visits to both campuses: "to remind these Jews that they bear the curse of their forefather’s murder of Christ. Further these college students of doomed america live for the devil himself, spending their energies on drunkeness, lust, sloth and greed rather than serving the Lord Almighty" </p>
<p>My D, who is a second-year at Brandeis, plans to prove their point about sloth, by sleeping through the whole thing ;)</p>
<p>Okay, sorry for the interruption. Back to the Elon discussion…</p>
<p>PRJ - perhaps your D has the right idea. After all, publicity is what they crave. If they protest in front of a Hillel and are ignored - maybe that is the best response - rather than a counter protest.</p>
<p>Fred Phelps and his group travel all across the United States spreading their message of hate and lies about minorities.</p>
<p>However, when WBC comes to Waltham to protest, they will actually be raising money for a local LGBTQ Jewish organization. Oh, the irony!</p>
<p>The point of this Phelps-A-Thon is two fold. First, we are using Phelps’ own hateful message to raise funds for a good cause, one that will help counter the lies that are being spread. Second, After the event, we will send Phelps a thank you card, telling him how much money he raised. This will certainly upset the group and it is possible that they will stop protesting in order to stop our fundraising.</p>
<p>I think the student body acceptance of diversity is an issue anywhere you go to college. My oldest daughter didn’t have any issues at Tulane because of the large Jewish population on that campus, but my D at Michigan was a whole other story (which also has a great Jewish community.) In fact, she had her first medical school interview today and she had to talk about whether she had ever encountered discrimination. Her horrible experience with her freshman roommate at last came in handy! </p>
<p>This girl was from a very small farming community in upper Michigan. She had never met any gays, Jews or people of color. Because she wanted to be a doctor, she requested a special housing program focused on students in the health sciences. The hallway was filled with gays, Jews and people of all ethnicities. I thought she would have a stroke when I met her moving in, she actually stated to my D that first night that she “couldn’t believe they had her sleeping with a Jew!” Yup, lots of fun. She once asked D how she could live next door to Muhamed from Lebanon? In fact, D had no problems with it and actually liked the guy. The end result was that by January my D was pulling her hair out and wanted to change rooms. They called in a “diversity counselor” to see if things could be worked out. The roommate admitted she was the problem and when they gave her the options of living with kids who might not be courteous, or studious, or had guys sleeping over, she thought my D was an angel by comparison. Anyway, the kid began to change and they stayed roommates. My D recently saw her on campus and the roomy admitted that she had grown up a lot in 4 years and apologized for her earlier behavior. They are still both on the path to med school.</p>
<p>What I am trying to say is, that sometimes a bad situation can be a learning experience for both students. The roommate learned to get out of her comfort zone and my D learned how to deal with discrimination in a civil manner. Good life lessons for both.</p>
<p>So, even if your kids end up somewhere with few Jewish kids, they may in fact be widening the perspective of those other students on the campus and learning how to cope in difficult situations.</p>
<p>MoltoBene - what a moving story - thank you for sharing it. I think sometimes our inclination is to protect our kids from all possible hazards - including people who may be unfamiliar with Jews. But as your D showed - it can be a growth experience for all involved. I guess there are times when minority kids have to act as an ambassador of sorts - your D certainly did and rose to the occasion.</p>
<p>MoltoBene: Thanks for sharing your story. It’s nice to hear one with a good ending. I had to laugh when the health sciences floor was filled with “gays, Jews and people of all ethnicities.” It reminded me of my sister’s preppie roomate at Penn who was surprised that “there are so many Jews here.”</p>
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