Confessions of a School Snob

[cptofthehouse]

<p>Worse for some places than others. I’ve known kids at these “stress” schools who elect to take their premed courses elsewhere due to the stress factor and other issues I mention in my previous post.</p>

[robinsuesanders]

<p>

However, if you haven’t lived in a small, rural community you probably do not understand the mentality of sticking close to home. If I had to hazard a guess, I would estimate 80-90% of his graduating class (in a school fairly highly ranked by USNWR) will attend one of a number of “no-name” schools in the area. It is more of a lifestyle choice than a lack of desire or motivation.</p>

<p>What my original question really was is how do I come to terms with his desire to stay within 1 hour of our little corner of the world, when I feel strongly that great opportunity lies outside this area? And, am I being elitist or snobby to feel that he’s wasting his talent.

</p>

<p>curmudgeon’s post (#74?) is spot on.</p>

<p>I do understand (in part) having lived in a small rural community growing up where many of the kids wanted to stay local. Of course, since I moved into that community when I was entering 6th grade and never really fit in, I spent my high school years desperately planning my escape … And hated being told I had to go to an instate school 'cause that’s all my folks could afford, and not appreciating (at the time) that in-state for Va was a pretty good deal for a top student who “had to go instate.”</p>

<p>So I think you encourage (and cajole) and maybe even pay for a solo trip to one or two schools over a high school break to schools that you’d like him to consider and see what happens. And see if he’ll compromise on the issue of college applications: You pick two (say School X and School Y) and he picks at least two of his choosing. And you don’t criticize his choices and he does his best to do a good job on the applications for yours. If he asks why you get to pick two places to apply, tell him honestly that you want him to have choices involving several * types * of schools come April 1. And have him apply RD everywhere. And wait. And while you’re waiting, try not to worry too much. And don’t nag S about his preferences for staying local, but do answer any questions he might ask about why you think School X and School Y might be good for him.</p>

<p>And once April 1 comes, you celebrate with your S all the acceptances and you look hard at the FA/merit packages and tell him which schools must be eliminated (if any) because they are not affordable, and tell him that you will NOT submit the enrollment deposit until May 1. And you wait some more. And don’t nag him about his preferences for staying local, but do answer any questions he might ask about what might be different if he were to decide to go away to School X or School Y. </p>

<p>Then on May 1, when S tells you his choice of school, you say, “Congratulations and good luck” regardless of which school he chooses.</p>