I thought I would update you all. I reached out for help thru my trainers and team doc and they are getting me set up with the help I need. I will admit that I wasn’t completely honest and a little dismissive and held back on how bad things were which I regret doing, but they are helping me out. it is completely confidential, and if I need medication then I will deal with that later. I want to thank everyone again for all the help. it was hard and a little embarrassing honestly telling someone else my issues face-to-face which was probably why I was sortof dismissive, but I honestly want to change for the better now and want the help.
I wish all of you well.