@VeryHappy, that’s really a toxic workplace, IMHO. I hope you found a job at a better place. There are definitely risks of reporting anything in a workplace environment, especially if it is someone that the boss is championing. I admit I would likely not mention it unless I was prepared to find a job elsewhere.
MOWC, I hope you are right. It has always grated on me. I of course retained a lawyer to help me allege retaliation, but in retrospect I still feel that I didn’t get what I deserved.
I had a “situation” at the next company, as well, that’s also a good story. And another situation – not sexual harassment; just plain old harassment – at my last corporate job. I am absolutely thrilled to be 68 years old so I never have to put up with that doodoo again.
Those of you who know me in real life know that my behavior is extremely professional and I do not bring this on myself.
I know of a situation of boss having an affair with a subordinate. Person caught in the middle complained and was fired
My previous boss did not get along with her immediate supervisor. Boss filed a complaint with HR about her supervisor. Boss was fired a few days later. Boss had a few performance issues but the supervisor did, too. I think my organization’s handling of the matter was terrible.
I know there are posters here who are in HR, so I do not mean disrespect to you individually, but in general HR is not your friend. Their job is to protect the company, not you. They will assess the risk and do what’s right for the company.
I was in HR for ~35 years, and I totally agree with you. Their job is not to make employees happy; their job is to comply with the law while helping management get what it wants.
In the 80s, I was the manager of technical publications at what was then the 20th largest software company in the US.
I cannot even begin to tell you how horrible the sexual harassment atmosphere was there. A few examples: when one of the development area managers would get married, they would have a bachelor party with prostitutes, for example. The next day, they would come to the office and tell the rest of us about their shenanigans with the women. One year, at the annual user group convention, the head of the company started an affair with one of the younger female programmers. His wife was in attendance. They all made jokes about it, and tried to hide it from the wife. The manager of the customer service department literally left his fiance at the altar and took up with a young woman who was a receptionist who reported directly to him. He was sued for breach of promise by his ex. The young woman moved in with him. Her aunt, who was the person who raised her after her mother deserted the family, died of cancer in a prolonged and agonizing manner. Her manager/lover had no time for her emotional turmoil, and moved in a new GF from his department. The young woman committed suicide. There was a woman who was the manager of a development division who has at one time been the fiancee of one of the other managers. He broke up with her, and married. (and AFAIK cheated regularly on his wife) She began drinking heavily–I would encounter her absolutely ripped in the elevator after lunch–and I subsequently heard that she committed suicide also.
This was a company that didn’t pay bills until they were on the third or fourth invoice. Their lack of ethics was truly astonishing.
I thought mental health benefits (including rehab) were required in health insurance plans nowadays. Do those rules not apply to employer-paid health insurance?
Those rules do apply. I think the poster might have been referring to Employee Assistance Plans (EAPs) which most large employers provide, but not smaller ones.
As @VeryHappy says, the programs offered through employers are likely EAP programs. The “welfare call” I mentioned earlier is apparently something that some members of AA do as a courtesy when asked, to speak with someone who appears to be demonstrating a problem with alcohol.
As for “morals” or behavior of male management decades ago, yes it was inappropriate, but so is the mention of their race or religion. That’s irrelevant. So what if they were WASPS or what have you. If it was such a terrible work environment, makes sense to look for other employment options. As for delays in payment of invoices, that happens all the time. Stinks but is not uncommon.
Our company has a strong mission and values statement that we follow- not just lip service. HR’s role is to support the mission and values, uphold the law, and assess what is the “next right thing” for the employees AND the company. If we make a mistake with respect to an employee, we do what we can to correct it. Our HR department works closely with me every single day to make sure the correct decisions are made and that every matter is investigated thoroughly. I know I am fortunate and that every company isn’t like that, but I could not work for a company that disrespected its employees and/or acted inappropriately.
We are all coming at this from our own perspectives, of course (with respect to the OP’s dilemma) and I can understand the different viewpoints. Perhaps a conversation with the alleged drinker himself might be the place to start. Uncomfortable, but maybe necessary.
I won’t pile on with the unfair retaliation work stories, but boy, like some of the other posters on this thread, I have seen some nasty situations over the years…
I mean, even if the OP was 100% positive the coworker was having a drink while out having a smoke, I’d be very wary about reporting it. IMO, you have to weigh whether the people hearing the report WANT to hear it. And sadly, many times they do not, and the messanger gets shot.
@jym626, the company not only didn’t pay the phone bill until the cutoff notice came, but they didn’t pay our suppliers either. Small printers have to pay their workers, you know? They can’t just say, sorry, I can’t pay you this week because the client won’t pay us. People have to pay their bills and buy groceries. Some of them started asking us not to ask them to bid our jobs. These people were sleazy, period.
And yes, I did look for and find other employment.
@Consolation - Of course companies should pay their invoices in a timely fashion. But many just don’t. In fact some that I know of had minimum 60 day turn around (not 30, 45 but 60) and commonly didn’t pay until at least 90. DH knows lots and lots of contractors, and did this himself for a while. Got very tired of chasing down reimbursement that required multiple billings and late notices.
While several posters have suggested that the OP discuss this issue with the alleged drinking co-worker, I would be apprehensive to do that as it would eliminate the possibility of approaching HR anonymously later.
I’m in @techmom99’s camp of the paranoid. She wrote:
“I like your idea of asking why alcohol isn’t included, but I would take it one step more. I would type up (on my home computer) an anonymous suggestion and submit it that way. This is tso it can’t be traced to you. I am paranoid so I would probably wear gloves. Since you aren’t 100% sure that your colleague is drinking, I wouldn’t mention his name at this point.”
Folks…if you really think someone is drinking during the day…and in the job…even if they appear functional…
Please please…discuss this with HR or your immediate supervisor.
You could be saving someone’s career…or life.
@fendrock I am curious if you are tea total (abstainer) or from a culture that generally disapproves of alcohol, regardless of setting?
Why would this matter?
Why would it matter? I am from a culture that is not against C2H5OH, but I disapprove any drinking on the job. Taking sips of vodka from a flask hidden in one’s car is not like having a beer after work with your work buddies - IMO, it a sign of a problem.
I agree with BunsenBurner.
I would also say that, it’s not very professional, nor respectful of your workplace, to be drinking on the job.
It’s interesting to see that most people feel it is not my place to note this to HR, and, in doing so, to object to such behavior.
I wonder what behavior they would consider warrants comment – it seems that, in terms of drinking, they feel one can only object if the person is actually staggering around drunk or behaves inappropriately (berating someone, shouting, etc.) due to inebriation - in which case it is not the inebriation that is at issue, but rather the behavior.