<p>I didn’t let my first three kids eat in the grocery store. I occasionally let the fourth on my terms. Number four is probably a more patient person than number one and has always delayed gratification just fine and wasn’t the kind of kid to throw tantrums. I will admit, standards do relax a bit by the time one gets to the fourth, but overall, I think the last kid often gets the best parenting. I’m quite certain nothing was lost with that kid in terms of character development by an occasional cracker.</p>
<p>I shop at Wegmans and in our store we have a coffee bar, pizza bar, sub shop, sushi bar, salad bar, Wokery/Indian food bar, carving station with paninis and sandwiches, plus way too many other food stations. Plus there are always tons of samples being handed out. So I see lots of people eating in my store. The nice thing is that there is an actual food court where you can sit and eat so the snacking throughout the store is not that bad. It is not unusual to see a parent with young kids sitting down having a quick snack. </p>
<p>I tend to see people having their coffee and a muffin/cookie while they walk around. I have gotten into the habit of stopping at the coffee bar myself.</p>
<p>When oldest DS was a toddler, I had to feed him while I shopped otherwise I would never get through the store. My first stop was always the deli and I got him a couple slices of bologna or I got a few cooked shrimp for him to chew on. The seafood clerks knew him and laughed about his love for shrimp.</p>
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<p>Don’t know where you live, but this IS considered shoplifting in my area and the department and store managers hate it! My kids work at the local Wallyworld during breaks and summers and they find dozens of discarded food packages each week as they’re straightening and restocking shelves (not in the grocery department either). Not to mention the half eaten produce, half full Dunkin Donuts cups, etc…I’ve seen this many times and it’s really gross. So, even if the cashiers are understanding, the rest of the customers and store employees probably wish you would bring your own snack and bottle of water and put it in the trash when you’re done! I always did that when I took my little ones to the store with me…a small toy, a bag of crackers, and a sippy cup or water bottle fit nicely in my purse or coat pocket. If the kid pitched a fit, I figured it was my cue to call it a day and take them home.</p>
<p>PS. Yay, for Wegmans…I love that place and often stop and eat at their little cafe areas! But you do have to pay as you get the food, so it’s different than walking around eating out of a package!</p>
<p>Anyone who thinks wiping down a cart will prevent them from getting sick is deluded. More likely just the opposite in the long term.</p>
<p>Seems like those of us with a more relaxed attitude about this are from the New York/New Jersey area. So I guess in answer to the OP’s question, it IS regionalized behavior! I still don’t understand what the big deal is if you pay for the item!! I better start changing my ways if I ever hope to move from here!</p>
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I think it is kind of rude to be honest. It’s against any eating etiquettes.
Couple of reasons:</p>
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<li>People can leave the garbage in the carts.</li>
<li>Kids can leave the germs all over the cart.</li>
<li>Small kids can choke on eatable because parent are not paying full attention.</li>
<li>Encourage cheating, it’s foolish on the part of anyone to believe that 100% of people indulging in this activity pay. Ethics/morality is not part of being wealthy.</li>
<li>It’s not yours unless you’ve paid for it or have indicated to do so. So morally/ethically it’s wrong.</li>
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<p>As far as I’m concerned, eating something is an indication that I intend to pay for it. (I believe that people are generally honest and don’t spend a lot of time worrying about those who aren’t.) I don’t leave garbage in carts. If I were going to worry about the welfare of children in grocery carts it would be directed towards those whose parents let them ride around standing up in the basket instead of securing them in the seats. I also shop at Wegman’s. There are people handing out samples all over the store on busy shopping days and many people eating. The end of a loaf of artisan bread when it’s just out of the oven is one of life’s little pleasures. They even offer cup holders that attach to grocery carts. If I show up a the checkout with a half-full bottle of water, the checker would assume that I needed to pay, not that I stood in line already to pay for that one item.</p>
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<p>The problem from the store’s POV is that many people do not…so they have to have their employees keep an eye on shoppers that like to break open and munch as they go because they can’t distinguish them from other shoplifters (my kids report that often the well-dressed, ordinary looking people are stopped with pockets/bags full of stolen stuff). Sadly, times have changed and shoplifting is something that all of us end up paying for. The samples are a different story…most people get one, pop it in, and discard the garbage on the spot. They don’t care if they see you eating stuff from the cafe or whatever other vendors are in the front of the store…that stuff has been paid for already.</p>
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<p>I never said eating standing in shop is morally or ethically wrong. What I said is eating without paying or indicating your intent to pay is morally or ethically wrong. Samples are already paid for you by the provider.
If you pop open a bottle without scanning it on the register then you’ve done something I consider morally or ethically wrong. It’s not important that your intention is to pay at the register. It’s against the eating ethics.</p>
<p>Vitrac, I’m from CA and I think people here are pretty relaxed about it, within reason.</p>
<p>I believe you pay AFTER you eat at most restaurants. Is that so wrong?? As long as you pay for it there is no harm in munching as you shop. The other stuff about leaving wrappers is just being a slob. People do that in many ways from littering to letting their garbage blow all over the neighborhood.</p>
<p>Are there any other Joan Didion fans who remember her essay that mentions being scowled at for wearing a bikini to the grocery store?
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<p>^ I don’t remember the essay, but I do remember shirtless men and shoeless women at the grocery store. I also remember smokers at the store . . . </p>
<p>Funny story - when I was a kid, I got a book from the Scholastic weekly reader thing about how to be a model. In the chapter on being a live mannequin at Sears and other such stores, they emphasized that you should NOT pose with your palm facing upwards, or someone would use it as an ashtray!</p>
<p>I confess that there have been times when I did open a package of sushi at Costco and ate one or more, especially when the line was quite long and I was very hungry. Of course, I paid for it, but I too am irked by all the rude folks who leave food and beverages all around stores. Some of it is for the store where they are shopping & some of it is from other stores. It really shows a complete slovenliness and increases the cost of doing business for the store having to have their employees clean up after the slobs.</p>
<p>I have also bought and consumed a bottle of juice at a health food store & paid for the empty bottle at the cashiers. Most of the time, I try not to do that, but I admit I have had lapses. ;)</p>
<p>Growing up, we never ate while shopping. We often devoured a loaf of raisin bread as soon as we got into the car though. 
I never sample any produce or anything that has to be weighed in the store (even tho sometimes the produce clerk offers). I admit I do sample the food offerings that are handed out by demonstrators at Costco, especially when I’m hungry on weekends.</p>
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<p>When you sit down in an restaurant, and you ordered food, it’s put on your name and the intention is conveyed.</p>
<p>But when you popped open a bottle in the super market, you have not made the intention clear because your intent was not recorded. </p>
<p>It’s ethically wrong whatever way you may like to spin it but it’s WRONG.</p>
<p>IloveLA, Is that from Slouching Towards Bethlehem? I should get that book out and read it again. (I am twenty years removed from my tenure in Orange County, when I first discovered Joan Didion.)</p>
<p>The local Vons sells Starbucks beverages and treats. And the carts there have cupholders, which seems to clearly imply that the store thinks it’s okay to sip/snack and shop.</p>
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<p>Actually, the last few times I’ve gone shopping, I’ve had the people who work in the produce department offer me samples in order to get me to buy. I always politely decline, because I just can’t imagine eating in the store, but I’ve seen this become very common recently. My dad also says he used to do it all the time (he worked in the produce department when he was younger).</p>
<p>We never ate in stores…if we weren’t well behaved, we were taken home. Mom talks to this day about leaving full grocery carts in the store and taking the screaming child home.</p>
<p>I think the in-store restaurants are a little different…as you pay for the product before you get it. I will get a coffee from Starbucks (seems like there’s one in every Safeway/Target around here) and sip while I shop…that’s about it. I just can’t imagine actually eating while I shop.</p>
<p>“House rules” seem to be fairly reasonable. Not sure what they expect to have folks put in the beverage holders in carts if they don’t want anyone to eat/drink while shopping. It seems that whomever runs/owns the place should be able to make the rules & how is it wrong to drink/eat if it seems acceptable in that place. I note that Costco only allows you to drink THEIR samples in their store and not bring in food or drink (even stuff you bought at their food court). You can bring in an empty cup but not sip your way through the store with a beverage you purchased (but OK with the sample beverages). Can’t say I understand it all that well–maybe something with insurance liability?</p>
<p>I have always politely declined offers of produce samples in their department because I was never convinced any of it had been washed. I know others have accepted these samples to decide whether to purchase.</p>
<p>I don’t know if it’s regional or not. I grew up in the South and was never allowed to eat in grocery stores. I once remember popping a grape in my mouth and being scolded by my mom. I never fed my children either. They could pick a treat but had to hold it until we reached the checkout and it was paid for. That’s what I see other parents doing at my grocery store currently. For me, it just seemed reasonable that you never “use” an item without paying for it first. Also, seems unhygenic to eat in a store. </p>
<p>Now, I do see samples given away in some stores. So, maybe times are changing. But I have to say, in my neighborhood, it is not common. (FYI, mostly lower/middle income, immigrant community).</p>