<p>One of the key reasons for those “punishments” was in the aunts’/uncles’ to provide a sense of perspective they felt their kids lacked because of their pickiness on how lucky their kids were to be in the US. </p>
<p>Another was because some expressed interest in joining the military when they came of age and the fathers wanted them to understand that in the military…especially the ones they served in during the '50s…you ate whatever the military gave you and if you didn’t like it, one must learn to deal. </p>
<p>Also, keep in mind most of the aunts/uncles were from the generation where the idea of kids…even adolescents/teens being picky was viewed as a serious breach of discipline/respect in the home. While one can discuss one’s preferences beforehand…once the meal has been planned out a week or so in advance or sooner you were expected to eat the meal served by the family. </p>
<p>Keep in mind most of the older cousins who grew up under this came of age from the late '60s to the early-mid '80s. While I got to witness some of this when visiting their homes, my parents were much more easygoing…though they did insist I finish all the vegetables I disliked at the time on my plate/bowl. </p>
<p>Good part of that is that unlike two recent presidents who are related…I enjoy eating a certain green vegetable they publicly detested. :)</p>
<p>It also factored in why I was welcomed back to dine with many families as a dinner guest while some picky eating college classmates who were imprudent enough to openly express their disgust/dislike over certain food items at the dinner table* weren’t invited back. </p>
<ul>
<li>Major no no…especially when dining as a guest in someone else’s home. It’s one thing if they ask for preferences BEFORE the meal and you express them politely. It’s another to do so at the dinner table…especially with open expressions of disgust.</li>
</ul>
<p>My DD#2 is a HS soph and quite the picky and weird eater. Generally will eat seafood (unless it’s “cooked wrong”). Pasta with clams is her fave. Hates steak. Likes chicken (thigh only). Likes pork-chops (bone-in only). Loves tofu, so we keep that in the fridge a lot. She just carves off hunks and eats it cold and plain. Likes cheese, but only hard yellow cheese (e.g., sharp cheddar) and, strangely enough, goat cheese. Will eat cooked tomatoes, but never raw. Same with carrots. “Small” couscous is ok, but not the Israeli (pearl) kind. She often changes her mind. Such as, she will declare she likes something and asks us to buy more. She will go to town on that item for a while but when we stock up, of course she decides she doesn’t like it anymore.</p>
<p>With six in the fam, we have a lot of taste buds to please, so we usually just present a “square” meal (protein, veggie, starch) and let her eat what she wants. If she doesn’t get enough, she can supplement with cereal, tofu, or whatever. The other night I made grilled shrimp with a mango salsa, rice pilaf, and a salad. She ate only the shrimp. The salsa was “gross,” the rice “weird,” and as for the salad: “you know I don’t eat salad.” Then she had a bowl of cereal. We find that “taco night” is relatively successful because we put out corn tortillas with lots of optional toppings and people can use what they want. DD#2 usually ends up with ground beef and sour cream. That’s it.</p>
<p>She doesn’t look malnourished (5’-3", 125), so I guess she’s getting enough of what she needs. I’m not too worried about it, just frustrated.</p>
<p>Mom of another picky teen here. He’s 17, college freshman and has Aspergers. He will eat almost anything “plain” - no sauces, no salt, no “flavor”. He will eat cheese pizza, but nothing else with tomato sauce. We started getting him used to college-type food about a year ago. He knows that he can eat items from the salad bar, ask for a plain grilled chicken breast or a plain hamburger patty. He will also eat unsweetened cereal (with or without milk) in a pinch. </p>
<p>We’ve asked doctors about his eating habits over the years, but they were unconcerned. He is skinny, but healthy. Fortunately, he does eat a variety of fruits and vegetables (as long as they are washed, peeled, cut and unflavored). I have noticed that peer pressure is starting to help - he went out for sushi with friends and actually ate a california roll (no soy sauce or wasabi, of course). He also knows how to politely decline food at other folks houses - he can always eat bread. </p>
<p>When it comes to fixing food at home - I learned to separate out the ingredients for him. Pasta night? He gets plain pasta and protein on the side. Chicken marsala? He gets plain chicken breast and veggies.</p>
<p>Yes, I was a picky eater as a kid. Like Romani, the rule was if you didn’t like what was served, then get your own dinner. I actually preferred that to having parents push me to eat things (which they didn’t do much because I had a killer stubborn streak). It worked for us, and I did expand my horizons and eat much more as an adult.</p>
<p>One of the things I realized once grown was that it wasn’t always that I didn’t like what was cooked, but maybe one or two of the ingredients. My Mom would make this italian casserole which I always hated. I realized as an adult that I don’t like black olives which were in the dish. I also really disliked another meal my Mom made, but it was because it had a heavy gravy and I still don’t care for gravy on anything. </p>
<p>So some of it is learning exactly what is the problem. They should grow out of it, or let them deal with it. Either way it will lower your stress level!</p>
<p>My kids are not picky eaters-I don’t know why, but others have commented through out the years how they are amazed at all the different foods my kids will eat!</p>
<p>I’m probably the only living American who can’t stand fruit and people are shocked, shocked by this. If it was something like milk, or fish or brussels sprouts (all of which I like) I’d never hear another word, but fruit? “OMG! What’s wrong with you?” So I try to respect other people’s food preferences. I did this with my kids and they are two of the least picky eaters around.</p>
<p>^This. Right now my freezer is full of… Trader Joe’s Mango Sorbet that she loved for a while, but now won’t touch. She is leaving for college next week, so I guess I will be finishing it off.</p>
<p>A quick scan did not show any mention of genetic supertasters. Supertasters are people who taste bitter foods to a much greater extent than the rest of us. They literally and factually taste things the rest of us can’t. I am one; I was a terribly picky eater well into my twenties. My son and daughter were, as well.</p>
<p>My solution was to stock up on simple foods that didn’t require much cooking (cheese, milk, yogurt, carrot sticks, fruit, etc.), teach my kids to cook and shop, take advantage of “the spice of hunger” (a hungry child is much less worried about the taste than one who isn’t hungry), and in general LET IT GO. Food is not worth a fight. In fact, fighting about food sets a child up for lifelong eating issues.</p>
<p>Had the last and would look forward to trying the former two. However, indications are that I may like Durian fruit from having some Durian fruitshakes at an Asian dessert place with some friends.</p>
<p>dmd–actually I thought of the whole supertasters thing too wrt this conversation. </p>
<p>Not sure I qualify but I definately taste things, especially in meats, that others don’t (meat often tastes “gamey” to me). </p>
<p>To the OP there was an excellent NPR discussion on (I believe) Science Friday last year on supertasters…worth looking into. They had a funny discussion about whether a “mixed” couple of one supertaster/not could “survive.”</p>
<p>This is just funny…my dad (91!) has decided he doesn’t want to eat broccoli 'cause he just doesn’t like it (mom served it all the time). He keeps referencing that Pres. Bush doesn’t eat it so why should he? I agree with him…just wish he’d decided that about 50 years sooner!</p>
<p>I’ve never made the kids eat stuff they say they hate. But I always put some on their plates (never kept me from serving it!) and say “at least TRY it…your taste buds change over time…you may like it someday! How do you know today is not the day?” Lo and behold they do like a lot of what they used to dislike. I try stuff all the time that I don’t think I’ll like…it’s sort of a family joke–will she or won’t she like it?</p>
<p>“at least TRY it…your taste buds change over time…you may like it someday! How do you know today is not the day?”</p>
<p>That is exactly what happened with my older D. She was always suppose to try “one bite”. One day she did this with the shrimp I’d made and said, “Hey! I like shrimp now! Cool!” Now it’s one of her favorite foods. The same thing happened with several different vegetables.</p>
<p>Back in HS biology class studying genetics we did a tasting test which showed that I could taste “bitter” in a big way. I was totally surprised that others just couldn’t taste it.
Nice to know that good cooking can alter those flavors big time!</p>
<p>My son just very recently decided mushrooms were edible after diligently avoiding them like the plague for years. But his GF is vegetarian so I think that may have made a major impact. :)</p>
<p>Footballmom–I’m not a fruit fan either. And I’m not sure where that came from. It has to be in my distant past, some horrible incident, whatever. Although no terrible “fruit” instances come to mind. But if I’m offered fruit (say DH cuts it up and presents it to me), I’ll try it and love it at the time but NOT enough to go out and want to try it again. Which is weird because it’s sweet and wonderful. Just nothing to which I return.</p>
<p>If anyone has a great theory on this, go for it. Might be good for me!</p>
<p>There’s enough nutrients in stuff like cereal that she wouldn’t get scurvy. That shouldn’t be a concern. </p>
<p>I might have been described as a picky eater but not nearly that picky. Basically, I’m not willing to subject myself to a day without eating meat. Always been that way. I don’t like the core of lettuce either (usually if I get something with lettuce at a restaurant I’ll rip the leafy part from the core part and just eat that). Don’t eat pork which can be sometimes problematic. Also need all my food spiced somehow. Minimum salt and pepper. </p>
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<p>Saw Balut on Bizarre foods. That looks awesome but I’ve never tried it before. Tried durian once, it is literally the most vile food I could possibly imagine. I think between eating meat off of a rotting corpse and a durian, I’d have to go with the rotting meat.</p>
<p>Hey, I’m going to stop complaining and worrying - many of you have teens who are pickier eaters than mine! And maybe it is a sensory or genetic/bitter thing going on. I have always been very good about not fighting about or forcing food (other than a daily multi-vitamin I insist we all take)…if anything, I’ve probably catered to much to her special tastes… Funny food story to share: The first hamburger patty I put on DD’s plate as a toddler - she looked at, shook her head and said “poop.” I’m like noooo its a burger! Good stuff! “Poop” she said shaking her head…stubbornly refusing a taste… she’s never eaten a hamburger, and to this day won’t try a bite. In two years (she’s a junior) she’ll be on her own with food and meal planning… Yay!.. Love her, just not her picky food requirements (although in 2 years I’ll probably post a tearful rant about how I miss cooking those special meals for my new off to college DD - ha ha!)</p>
<p>footballmom104-With D it was veggies, not fruit. And yes, one bite, even if it was only one pea or carrot slice. And she HAS changed what she eats-even designed a vegetarian plate at one of the restaurants she worked at. So I’m a big believer in this system. There wasn’t a punishment for not doing it and no on shoved anything at her-just asked her to try one bite. I’ve always tried to get my kids to hit the main food groups at least a little for their health.</p>
<p>One aunt who had several toddler/young boys during the '60s basically responded by not serving them anything else until it is finished. She figured once they got too hungry, they’ll deal. After a couple of times, they realized they eat what was served or the food served stayed on the plate to the next meal or few. </p>
<p>Nowadays, while they have their food preferences, those older cousins are some of the most adventurous and open-minded when it comes to food.</p>