<p>My son got 4 Ivy League rejections (out of 4 applied to) online last night and waitlisted to Tufts. He had kind of a similar reaction in that it is one thing to say, “I know I’m a long-shot, but I’m going to give it a shot and apply” and another to receive the notices, “Sorry… we had record numbers of applicants… many talented students… cannot offer admission.”</p>
<p>I think feeling like a failure or being depressed for a bit is okay. Generally first choice schools are ones that you visited and part of you envisionned going there. You put a lot of effort into applying to a first choice school and when you get the “Thanks, but no thanks” it’s normal to feel depressed on some level. You are mourning the loss of one dream.</p>
<p>What’s important is to remember is that you can be very happy elsewhere. </p>
<p>I know, for my son, his writing skills would make it tough for him to compete with Ivy league students. Another college may offer him greater opportunities to develop areas that he needs improving in without it crushing his undergraduate GPA. We were warned that if he wanted to go for a graduate degree, that having a so-so GPA at an Ivy League school would put him behind a top of class at the state university. Basically it’s impossible to predict all of what might have happened if you got into your top choice and what can now happen going to your second choice.</p>
<p>It’s okay to feel down. Just make sure you don’t stay down. Focus on deciding where you will go. That’s what we’re doing. He’s got a couple very nice offers and we need to learn more about each of them to choose where he DOES want to go. Then when you are decided, focus on getting the most out of it… and then yes, one day you will be able to say, “I don’t care that I didn’t get into x… because I’m really happy I went to y.”</p>
<p>Good luck! </p>
<p>p.s. The short answer is… I think initially ‘yes’ there was some feeling of being a failure.</p>