<p>I like Frye bags a lot. I have several pairs of Frye boots, and the quality is terrific.</p>
<p>This seems like another one of those CC threads like “coloring your hair” and “watching TV” or “owning a big TV” or “wearing a diamond” or “buying a nice watch” or “driving a nice car” or “using higher end skin products or makeup” where there can be an element of self-righteousness by some who do NOT make those choices. </p>
<p>Is it “wrong” to have expensive taste? Is it not socially acceptable in your world to buy designer clothes/shoes/purses? Does a potential spouse lose points and/or support to be part of a family if they like and purchase certain clothes? I really don’t get it. Or rather, I do get it…</p>
<p>My new dil came from a similar background economically. Interest wise…not so much. They camped. We didn’t and won’t. Charity wise both families give money (and in their case labor) to organizations. If my dil was judged and was judged by these standards it would have been unfortunate. </p>
<p>There does seem to come down as to who can spend the least on certain goods and clothing. What Not Wear actually had an episode about a young woman who put her stuff in a brown paper bag. That got her nominated for the show.</p>
<p>I really don’t care if someone carries a $10K bag or one from the thrift shop. I like quality items and can afford them. If the OP’s son sees his girlfriend’s spending on luxury items as something he wouldn’t want to support should they get married, he should move on from this relationship. Op’s son needs to find someone who has the same views on spending. Money is one of the main sources of disagreement in a marriage</p>
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<p>Oh, I thought her family couldn’t afford to pay for the wedding, so you did.</p>
<p>Anyways, off topic.</p>
<p>Notice the reference to camping? They lost a lot of money to a mental illness and then a divorce… Expensive taste on a crackerjack budget. </p>
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<p>This. Absolutely this. </p>
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<p><a href=“http://store.dolcegabbana.com/us/dolce-gabbana/women/onlinestore/bags”>http://store.dolcegabbana.com/us/dolce-gabbana/women/onlinestore/bags</a></p>
<p>I doubt that DD (25 years old) notices. But she’s not into fashion hype and has never carried a purse. </p>
<p>I pay a lot of attention to purse selection, but only for practical logistics not brand. They need to have a front compartment dedicated to my keys and work badge. I used to also need a cellphone compartment, but these days I always carry the phone in my pocket. </p>
<p>I have a phone wallet, which is great.
Can’t wait for apple pay.
I do like to carry a bigger bag in the summer, to stuff a sweater in.
In the winter, I end up with the clothes I started with, so all I need room for is my phone, a pen, and some lip balm.
I would feel pretty silly if I needed a $3,000 bag to carry thngs I could hold in one hand.
However, if they stopped using that gaudy gold metal trim and used goatskin instead of calfskin, I mght give them another look.</p>
<p>Funny, my DD just saw my black Antonio Melani bag that I so lovingly described - she really liked the look.</p>
<p>Don’t y’all remember maybe a year ago Oprah was in an exclusive Geneva Switzerland store and wanted to see a particular handbag (that was maybe $25,000?) The clerk didn’t realize she was dealing with a very rich person and tried to steer Oprah to a lesser priced bag - Oprah and her group tried to make it out like it was because she was black. I am not familiar with Geneva, but many areas of Switzerland, they are use to people of color being wealthy. The clerk I believe was Italian; the shop manager was very diplomatic in trying to gently say it was a misunderstanding. Unfortunately the clerk should have just shown Oprah the bag. I do understand some of these really expensive bags of such high quality soft leather scratch/mark easily… Usually Swiss are very much customer service, but I have dealt with a young snob once on a public bus in Lucerne that acted like she was ‘better’ than the rest of us on the bus (I accidentally barely touched her while she was sitting and I was standing and holding the grab bar - when she reacted, I said excuse me in English, but then gave her a tongue lashing in Swiss when she made a comment in Swiss about some Indian ladies sitting on the bus - who had as much right as anyone else to be on public transportation).</p>
<p>Off topic, but to get back to topic, some women spend more money on one luxury item. Some women it may be a glimpse into being ‘high maintenance’.</p>
<p>Also in the South, a woman’s handbag is sacred - not to be opened w/o permission! That may be ‘old South’, but I like the concept.</p>
<p>They didn’t recognize Oprah?
Maybe the clerk was snobby cause she is American.</p>
<p>My girls get a bag whenever they break up with a BF. The more I dislike a boy, more expensive the bag is. The deal is usually if you go back with the boy, I take the bag back. </p>
<p>Both of my girls have very nice bags, some were hand me downs from me. I gave them each one of my old Chanel bags. D1 buys her own bags. She wouldn’t expect her future H to buy her bags.</p>
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<p>Perhaps I didn’t explain it quite right. It didn’t have to do with wanting or not wanting what peers in social circles have or don’t have. It was more that they were not exposed to designer handbags or clothing while growing up in rural VT. So, one might not desire what one doesn’t know much about in the first place! </p>
<p>My girls are their own person. Sure, they NOW have more exposure living in cities and having gone to colleges where there were girls who had such handbags. So, they know a lithe about them now I suppose. And since their desires do not depend on what their peers have or don’t have, they still don’t want designer handbags. They don’t seem to care about this. BUT sure, they like nice things! I’m surely not putting down quality products! I was only talking about handbags in this case. My girls have other nice things or else items they do care about. It may be a brand name back pack (ie., Patagonia) or expensive ski equipment or a good keyboard, etc. They just are not designer handbag and clothing types. </p>
<p>In any case, even though they are city girls, I still think there is something to be said about their background being in a rural area in the mountains. I think there is some influence in one’s background no matter where they grew up. Heck, a friend was joking with me about this on my FB wall today. I had posted photos I found online of D2 who was in a public performance last night with a number of award winning Broadway stars. While these folks were all quite a bit older than my D, they were dressed up a lot and I notice that my D was in casual clothing. She obviously can walk the walk and talk the talk (or sing it) with these stars, but I thought she looked out of place in her attire and my FB friend who happens to also live in VT joked that my girl is from VT and so she still has the Vermonter in her even if she is performing with stars in NYC. And, well, I think there is a bit of truth to that.</p>
<p>Bringing up ski equipment, makes designer purses seem almost frugal!</p>
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<p>Exactly! LOL!</p>
<p>This is what I was trying to say. I’m not knocking expensive things! But one’s exposure to things and perhaps some of their desires have some relation to where they have been raised and so forth. It isn’t a matter of what their peers want or have but simply what they care about. And frankly, most kids in rural VT aren’t exposed to or care about designer duds. But skis? Sure! My kids grew up in a ski resort town and have skied since they could walk. It ain’t a cheap sport. My kids were racers, and one raced in college. Ski racing equipment is expensive. My older D still skis (she now has a professional career). What she wanted for Hanukah was definitely not a designer handbag (could care less) but rather, money toward ski lift tickets this winter in Europe because she is living in Europe this year. </p>
<p>My other D…hmm…well it is a good two months past her birthday when I asked her what she wanted and she could not come up with anything and I offered to get her a new winter jacket as she is still wearing the same one she got probably 8 years ago in college. She has yet to go out and buy it. For Hanukah, she could not name anything she wanted. Now, she is saying she could use some pants. I offered to buy her a nice pocketbook (not designer) but she could care less about that. Meanwhile, she has two gift offers from me and has yet to buy a thing! </p>
<p>Even trail passes are expensive.
Here’s to new snow!</p>
<p>“But one’s exposure to things and perhaps some of their desires have some relation to where they have been raised and so forth.”</p>
<p>Absolutely. My 22 yo son, for example, would not have a clue about any of these names / brands, even though his twin sister might, and I have some of the brands in question. But we just took him to Brooks Brothers to get some suits and an overcoat, so we impressed on him that BB was a classic “name brand” that will do him well for investment purchases. To Soozie’s ski example, we all have things that we care about and may care about a brand name, and things where we don’t. </p>
<p>" D1 buys her own bags. She wouldn’t expect her future H to buy her bags."</p>
<p>That’s what I think is the thing that MCAT is worrying excessively about. There is no “expectation” that a SO buy a handbag. He might, or he might not. When I’ve wanted or needed a new handbag, I go buy it myself. H hasn’t bought me one in years. </p>
<p>Anyone who reads (including the Wall Street Journal) , watches tv or goes to the movies winds up with quite a bit of exposure to name brands. </p>
<p>There are all areas in which we each snob, and areas in which we reverse-snob by proclaiming that we know nothing about the thing in question (with the implication that those who do are wasting their time on trivialities). If I’m being honest with myself, I’m kind of that way wrt professional sports. </p>