<p>I’m pretty sure that those are the only aspirations Mrs. Hambry, who introduced me to the War of Yankee Aggression during third grade Georgia history lessons, cared about!</p>
<p>Her sole concession to the emerging civil rights movement in the early 1960s was changing the the last syllable of a word from “er” to the polite form, “ra”, in the classroom.</p>
<p>And, actually, to be precise, they only cared about white men’s aspirations since women where not accorded the right to vote until more than half a century later.</p>
<p>dke: That’s fascinating. I know nothing of Northern Florida, but I’ve lived a lot of different places, and the ONLY place I’ve ever lived where the value of how women and men looked was of utmost importance, was in Manhattan. That’s the only place I’ve also ever met people who had either: breast implants, hair implants, chemical peels (on a regular basis), face lifts, regular injections of botox; regular visits to the spa/hair/nail salon; and seems like everybody I met had had a nose job at one time or another. Oh, yeah, and we would always joke that no one (women, anyway) living in Manhatten seems to have grey hair. </p>
<p>A friend from Seattle just visited us over the summer. She gets regular injections of botox, too, and had just recently–a few weeks before she visited us–had her face burned off, which I assume is a common practice. Women actually pay a doctor to give their face a 3rd degree burn. Ouch. What with all her lines burned off, and her regular botox for the lines that didn’t burn off and to prevent new ones, she just looked downright weird. By the by, she is originally from the Midwest. </p>
<p>Anyway - I’ve never met anyone in the South–yet–who has done any of this. I’m quite sure they exist, but not where I live. And working on Wall Street (for women and men) is a pretty common occurrence around here, too. Not a very big deal. Northern Florida must be very strange.</p>
<p>Women’s movement has always been carefully observed in the South.
(Sorry - it was just too good to pass up)</p>
<p>Boiled peanuts are something you just have to try - be sure to get them hot. They really are quite good. Avoid the so-called garlic ones…never had any that were any good.</p>
<p>Parent2noles, we got talking to the boiled peanut man when we first moved here, and were surprised to hear that he was from one town over in New Jersey where I grew up… ha! Go figure.</p>
<p>I was never called an “intellectual” until I moved here. I asked someone why they thought that and she said, “Because you read the New York Times every day”. errrr.</p>
<p>I wear no makeup, simply wash and brush my hair (no “do”), and dress on non-work days pretty much like you do, dke. Even my work clothes are simple and classic, no frill at all.</p>
<p>I have friends in Alabama, MS and Texas. These friends would not dream of leaving the house without their hair and makeup all “done”; their clothes pressed and matched, and HOSE (I never wear HOSE).</p>
<p>I would stick out worse than a sore thumb! It’s embarrassing enough to my children that I go to the grocery store 99% of the time in my workout clothes!</p>
<p>Last week, one of my friend’s sister-in-law came down to visit and to see her nephew play in one of the football games. We all had lunch before the pep-rally, which we do every week. The theme was Camo, so we all were dressed in hunting gear, one lady even had a fake fern attached to her hat. Weird, but true.</p>
<p>After that we went to the pep rally, and I don’t know what they are like around the rest of the country, but they are a BIG deal here. The gym probably had close to 3000 people in it. The band was blowing, the cheerleaders were doing tumbling runs, the drill team did a kick routine, the football players were feted. And, like I said, everybody dresses up, faculty, parents and especially students. It is a happening and it is a ball! Anyway, this northern lady, who I will say was fabulously cool, must have felt like she had landed in the twilight zone. I’m sure she went back to New Jersey and said, “you know everything you think about crazy texans and their football is true.” </p>
<p>Funny story, but it made me take a look at our “traditions” and realize that we are weird and different and I wouldn’t have it any other way! I’m sure there are cool traditions in the north that I would not understand, but I would hope that I could relax and enjoy it. Viva La Difference!!</p>
<p>Allmusic - NO hose around here!!! Workout clothes are my favorite (or a tennis outfit). You can wear them all day and nobody has to know that you got done working out at 10!</p>
LOL! I knew I’d reached middle age when I first started to visit Target or the grocery store after dropping kids at school, before shower etc! I will admit that I hope not to run into anyone I know, but so what!</p>
<p>Well, that was the question. Whether middle age had made me so sloppy, or whether I was just sloppy to begin with, and I guess it is the latter.</p>
<p>This works out well for me, since everyone I know grocery shops or Targets in workout clothes too! If I were the only one, I might be guilted into dressing up more, but heck if anyone could guilt me into getting made up or hair done to go to the Stop and Shop!</p>
<p>Late to the party but I had to comment on one of the first posts regarding Southerners moving to the South and telling natives how things should be done. My area has become way too popular lately and one of the things about newcomers is that they think that whatever was normal in their old area is the way it should be and they’re not shy about saying so. Doesn’t much matter where they moved from.</p>
<p>Northerner (midwesterner), married to southerner (20 years), living in the south for the last 10 years. . .7 years in a very rural area (I think a lot of the differences are rural/urban–big city south isn’t much different from up north, but overall, the south is much more rural). BTW, I take no offense at confederate flags–see them all the time. They are accepted as a cutural/historical symbol of pride. Local HS had “Rebel” mascot, up-tempo “Dixie” as fight song, confederate flag on the school sign. Only outsiders would care about this or think of it as racist. </p>
<p>I had to laugh at someone from NJ saying her daughter is not rude. All Yankees are rude. In the South, you just have to know that. You don’t think you’re rude, but you will be perceived as rude. If you stay long enough you’ll start to understand why. Yankees are always trying to “improve” things instead of accepting things they way they are. They’re always complaining, talking too fast, being pushy, too impersonal. </p>
<p>Things I’ve learned: Never correct people or complain. Never, EVER correct people or complain in public. Always wave when you pass another car/truck on a country road. Never act impatient. Always chat with the checker. Always be aware of who is related to whom–and in a small town that means everyone to everyone else. Laws are made to be broken. Always drink sweet tea. Get used to seeing guns (I’m not a gun owner). Get used to explaining why you don’t own a gun. (“Because I probably would’ve killed H at least 20 times by now,” seems to work.) Learn to say “y’all.” And don’t worry, the South is filled with northerners.</p>
<p>I don’t feel too odd here with no makeup, graying unstyled hair, sweats/jeans–but I shop at the Mexican WalMart. One time, after complaining how long it took her to do her hair, makeup, dress in the morning, etc., a southern “friend” said to me, “I wish I could be like you. . .You just don’t care HOW you look!”<br>
Here’s another one: after moving to the Ozarks from SoCal, a friend asked me, “Why is everyone around here so ‘beat up’ looking?” (People who work outdoors, have no health/dental care, no $ for cosmetics, hairstyling–that’ll give you a look that you don’t see much in LA).</p>
<p>All the southern ladies of my Mama’s generation that I knew growing up believed that you should never leave the house without makeup and nice clothes (not dress-up but not housework clothes either, just nice looking) because in small southern towns you were bound to run into somebody you knew everywhere you went and would be embarassed if caught lookng frumpy. It was a matter of dignity for them I think. </p>
<p>My mother passed away 3 years ago. When she entered the hospital for the final time, upon check-in she realized that she had left her make-up and hair spray at home and ordered her two best friends to return to the house and bring it to her hospital bed. She knew friends and church members would be visiting her. She passed away one week later… A true southern lady in every sense of the word.
I rarely leave my house without make-up. It would somehow be disrespectful to her memory and my upbringing in the rural south.</p>
<p>“I have friends in Alabama, MS and Texas. These friends would not dream of leaving the house without their hair and makeup all “done””</p>
<p>Hee. My mother and I spent a weekend in Oxford, Mississippi earlier this year. I had heard a lot about the Ole Miss belles and the expectation that ladies look lovely all the time. Thinking “when in Rome,” I dressed up in my sharpest Diane von Furstenberg silk jersey print and did my makeup and hair to go out to brunch on Sunday, and I encouraged my mother to dress up too. We opened the door of the restaurant just as two teenage girls in jeans were coming out, and as we bumped into each other, one of them blurted out, “Y’all look so nice!” She walked away, gave an embarrassed giggle, and said to her friend, “I don’t know why I said that, but they did.”</p>
<p>I realised after awhile that the women here get up extra early to make sure that a full make-up is done, even eyeliner!! I guess I’d rather zzzz. (Since I turned 50 I do wear makeup but not eye makeup…takes too long.)</p>
<p>Although I will admit that I have many friends who don’t leave the house without makeup, I also have many who do. And my motto has become, “Oh, I know that everybody knows how good I can look when I’m dressed up!” I’ve lived in the same neighborhood for 42 years (except for the 4 years I spent in Dallas in college). I can’t go anywhere without seeing tons of people. But, it is a liberating feeling to not really worry what people will think if I don’t have on makeup!! :)</p>
<p>My son told me that one of his classmate’s parents talked to my son for an entire day about hunting when he was visiting his daughter at college! My son has never been hunting, so it was a little bit different for him.</p>
<p>Jack said,
</p>
<p>Jack, I have one family member from NC who married into my husband’s family and my husband’s family is from NY. This is exactly how she feels that some family members perceive her. She said that one family member actually tried to teach her about how one sets a table properly…give me a break!</p>
