@Trixy34 I think the important point is that the neuropsych. used a “survey” (questionnaire) with info from home, rather than an objective test, as the main part of the diagnosis. (I have seen a neuropsych play the radio while asking a kid to do a task, to test for ADHD, and then tell me that it isn’t valid since it is not a good mimicry of real life!)
I mainly wanted to suggest- regardless of diagnosis or no diagnosis- that some of the behaviors of the son suggest a problem that might be addressed with support of some kind. Doesn’t have to be meds. With or without a diagnosis, extra advising on time management and finishing tasks might help, or if the parents can afford it, hiring a coach (Landmark School can suggest one, and they often work online or by phone).
My own kid was diagnosed with ADHD at age 18. I knew something was wrong in high schooo, and I did have her evaluated. But no one told me how to get ADHD assessed and I found out later it was by questionnaire and not in the evaluation- that’s why I raised that point. The evaluation showed very slow processing and a learning disability based on a gap between “verbal and performance” but no mention of attention. Ugh.
Regarding meds…my kid generally cannot take ADHD stimulant meds because she also has bipolar 1 and stimulants can trigger mania. (The few times she has taken them the results in terms of papers have been stunning.)
The thing is, having the diagnosis just helped how we, and she, looked at her challenges. It helped her accept that she needed support (and accommodations, which she, like many, tended tor resist, but helped in a pinch) It confirmed my parental intuition that certain things were NOT her fault.
And our kid has made some changes to the way she approaches things based on the info provided by a diagnosis. It is really helpful, in general, to name a problem.
ps look up questionnaires- there are a gazillion online, for example:
for adult who might have ADHD https://add.org/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/adhd-questionnaire-ASRS111.pdf
for parent of child https://www.unitedpsychological.com/pdf/ADHA_inattentive_child.pdf