I have access to my DS portals. Doesn’t bother him in the least and it allows me to help him manage things since his schedule is pretty packed as it is…
I didn’t have access to D’s portals, but I never asked, and she’s pretty buttoned-up and on top of things. S is completely different and I had to help walk him through setting them up. I have a college spreadsheet I had put together so I added direct links to the portals with login info saved on my computer. He would check it daily. Now that acceptances came in, I’ve gone back and checked to see if there’s anything important either of us need to know.
Nope.
I had access to the Common/Coalition apps and the College Board. I did not have access to the individual college portals. Even now, for both of my kids’ schools, parents have a separate login to access the financial account info to pay the bills.
Not to her application portals, no. This was a kid who genuinely did her college applications entirely herself- I only got to read the essays when I paid the application fee, lol. I do have access to her college portal now that she’s enrolled, via the parent access - not using her details.
I had access to S17’s portals. He was also very laid back and didn’t care. I didn’t really do much. I still have access to his college portal because that’s where the bill is paid. TBH I don’t log on very much other than bill time at this point.
D21 isn’t to the applying stage yet, but our school has parents set up a separate “parent” naviance account so I can explore all I want. I can add schools of interest, but they show as added by parent not student, and only D can remove schools once they’re added. I like it this way - my niece is the same age and her school just lets parents use the same ID as the kid. One parent is insistent on adding uber-competitive schools that niece has no interest in. Makes it hard for the counselor.
Access? I’m pretty sure I’m the only one that uses them. 
S19 was fine with my knowing his password for the Common App and his portals. He did most of the keeping track but I did log in every week or so (especially to the CA acct) to make sure transcripts were sent, etc. I didn’t really have much of a reason to go on his college portals. He, of course, logged in himself to get his decisions.
I never had access during the application process to anything my kid submitted…except the financial aid application forms.
Once matriculated, we had access to the bursars office. But we also made it clear that we needed to see all grades online each term and the kids did this (it helped that they also sent deans list letters here). Without seeing grades, we weren’t paying the next term bill.
Only access I have is to the bursars office to pay bills. Have never looked at college grades for any of my kids. But, I know my kids well ( and their grade points are on their resume). We discuss things, they handle it all well and we’ve not had any issues.
If I thought my kids needed my help and oversight I would certainly have access.
Interesting question! I didn’t have access to my D17 or S19’s college app portals. D17 did it ALL by herself, that’s her nature. S19 needs more oversight, but he does resist much parental management…his reactions sound a lot like your Ds, so I did not have access and did not ask for it. He did not want me to read his essays so I think this was a part of it, but I didn’t push it since I know his desire for independence when it comes to his school stuff. However, since IMO he still needs oversight, I did go over deadlines and his Common App home screen (with him logging in) periodically to make sure that everything was submitted on time and was showing as received.
This is totally separate from billing/payments, IMO. Once your child accepts, they are sent a link to pay the enrollment deposits and housing deposit (similar to when they complete a college application and get to the payment page). When a student actually enrolls, they are sent a link to have parents create their own billing account and absolutely every parent should have this.
There isn’t anything personal or controversial on the portals besides their application info including their essays. At some point, after enrollment, she would be filling out a housing preference form which could have some personal info (habits, lifestyle) but that isn’t a factor now. I am wondering if your Ds refusal has to do with her stress level and personality. Perhaps she doesn’t want to deal with it now, or gets stressed when you talk about and feels like this would open the door to more (I can relate…my S hated my spreadsheet). You can look up enrollment deadlines, housing deposit info and how housing is allocated, orientation info on the colleges’ general websites if you are worried about missing deadlines. You should also be able to look up all kinds of general information about the college and programs online. This is what I would do. IMO students should be allowed to “own” their own portal access if they prefer, and its a valuable step towards the parental hands-off of the college experience.
Honestly, in this house everyone has access to everything. All passwords are stored and there isn’t really anything worthy of hiding anyway.
OP here. Interesting mix of responses!
All I’ve asked D20 for is access to portals for schools where she has already been admitted. I never accessed the common app, other than the review together before submission. I don’t access either kid’s high school portal/grades.
I can live without college portal access for now but the huge question in my mind is “Why not?” So it makes me wonder if there is something secretive on there but I can’t imagine what it would be. I do think she feels anxious and vulnerable in this process so maybe it’s just about control.
We are full pay and scrounging for merit here and there and I sometimes wonder if there are things to apply for after acceptance, that I don’t know about. But I try to do my best with the colleges’ regular websites.
I guess it probably varies by school, but there isn’t really anything interesting in the portals for my daughter’s schools. I guess the University of Iowa is more extensive with info on housing etc, not that I’ve actually spent any time on it. But the vast majority are just checklists showing what’s required and whether they’ve been received and eventually a decision letter.
At my kids’ universities, they have their student portal for class registration, academic record, financial aid, housing, and meals. Only they have access to that.
They can add an authorized user for billing and tuition payment purposes.
For the college portal, the student can give delegate access to parents for limited view or full view. Typically finance, housing, and academics (course/grade/GPA). Most students give the parents access to finance info (someone has to pay the bills!). Mine doesn’t mind if I can see her grades so she just gave me full access. I’ve only logged on once since August 2018 to see if 529 has paid for the tuition we submitted.
I have to have access to D18’s account- or I can’t pay tuition or housing. She doesn’t care. I can also see all her grades- on the rare occasion I check and see a bad grade, I jokingly give her crap about it. She would expect nothing less.
I did for college apps. There is just too much administrative cat herding. I didn’t really feel like it was a student’s responsibility to make sure the adults in charge actually do their jobs. Plus, we knew of a case where a boy was supposed to handle this for himself and there was a screw up with his school that went unnoticed until it was too late.
I don’t have access to college portals. Parents have their own portal for payment.
I’ve seen a lot of portals in this process, and all portals are not created equal. Some have no FinAid information, and don’t even let you know if the school has received the FAFSA/CSS. Others have separate checklists for FinAid items. Still others have scholarships and merit money listed or links to such. Even more, some colleges email reminders about FinAid, including grants and merit money stuff.
My son knows we’re in the hunt for all types of FinAid, but he’s a teen. He’s not going to necessarily tell me everything that’s on every portal. He might not even look at it. What he really cares about is “was it YES or NO?”. If I left it to him, he/we would miss out on just about every FinAid benefit. Especially because many colleges have Scholarship application deadlines that land earlier than decision day. We can’t wait to find out if he’s been accepted to start the FinAid hunt.
During application time I did. He didn’t want to be bothered with all of it. Once he chose a college and started we only have access to the parent portion so we can see the fee statements and pay the bills. It has been fine.