We have a family member (my husband’s brother) who has been mentally ill since his early twenties. I could write a book about it, but part of his life was spent homeless and living on the streets. He is currently living in a facility. Anyway, we do help out panhandlers on occasion, primarily with things like food and water bottles. Husband hands out socks sometimes. Rarely cash, but $5 here and there.
There have been some undercover stories that show that a lot of these people just treat this like a job. They are not even poor or deprived. There are resources out there that will help people, and handing out money on street corners is about an unproductive an activity as one can take part in.
I prefer giving to women and children shelters. We collect items to donate. Usually the local shelters have a list of items posted online. We also like to give to the local pantry. The article made me think twice. Here this woman was just trying to help someone in need and her own safety was at risk. It just gave me something to consider the next time I stop at an intersection. It is sometimes hard to tell who genuinely needs help. Sometimes you want to offer something but then you hold back when you read such stories. Outside our grocery store a volunteer from the Salvation Army stands next to a kettle. I passed by today not having cash on me but next time I will make sure to have a few bills in my pocket to put something in that kettle. Life is so unpredictable.
I think a case can be made that anyone who chooses to stand in an intersection holding a sign as their job has some issues preventing him or her from choosing some other form of work. I have no doubt that among the panhandlers is a con artist or two, but doing that indicates they’re not very good con artists. I think most have no other options, or none that they can access for whatever reason.
I don’t give but I always feel a bit of Confusion. As someone mentioned I’m driving out of the grocery store with a trunk of groceries in my car. I’m very fortunate.
I have a family member who went through a hard period and I made a decision at that point to not give money to people on the corner. Many will use that money for drugs and alcohol. Thus prolonging them getting help.I will sometimes give them food. My D sometimes hands out socks.
One of my friends had a brother who was an alcoholic and drug abuser. He lived in public housing and he told my friend that a lot of the guys on the off ramps lived in his apartment complex and were schemers. Basically he told her just give money to me. He was also a scammer.
On the other hand I have another friend whose D suffers from schizophrenia who lives on the streets. My friend always gives to those who she feels are mentally ill. I have another friend who often will talk to young teens who she sees panhandling. She listens to their stories and encourages them to go to a shelter or has even let them use her cell phone to call a parent.
My H plays volleyball daily on a beach where a lot of homeless hang out. They run the range of alcoholics to mentally ill. Interestly they don’t ask the volleyball players for money. One likes to read and asks for books. Another lost his beach umbrella which gave him sun protection and asked them if they would get him a new one. After a heavy rain they will sometimes give the guys dry clothes. Surprise was that they are particular about what they will take.
I donate to an organization that provides portable showers for the homeless.
The homeless dude hanging out near the movie theater in our small town would scream and throw food back at the well-wishing people offering food items to him. He only wanted money and he made it loud and clear after being given a hamburger or a drink. After watching this a couple of times, don’t offer food (and I never hand out money).
When I have been in NYC I have seen people who are truly homeless, disabled, and mentally ill. My heart breaks. Here where I live the groups staffing intersections appear to be drug users who clearly work together.
Once my husband was in Detroit on business. He came out of a restaurant carrying a pizza box. A street person approached him asking for money. My husband offered him the pizza. The person asking for money replied, “what kind?”
Many years ago we exited a highway and at the bottom of the ramp was a man with a “will work for food” sign. We drove by but for some reason felt sorry for him. We went immediately to a store and bought a bag of bananas, oranges, and apples and drove back to the ramp and handed him the bag of fruit. He looked at us so confused and as if we were insane.
I only give food. When we are traveling and leave a restaurant with a doggy bag we always give it to the nearest homeless person. They always seem grateful. We once had almost a whole pizza which we offered to a homeless man. He shared it with another homeless person.
Seeing homeless people always strikes me hard since I know that a lot of them are mentally ill. I am 100% convinced that if it wasn’t for my constant advocacy for my son with schizophrenia, he would be on the streets. The system CAN work, but it’s almost impossible for an ill person to navigate by him/herself. 
My brother died of the effects of alcoholism. He was never homeless, never begged at an intersection. At the end he was living with another sibling and was trying to sell his banjo and his car to buy the beer we wouldn’t give him. He died anyway. He would have died happier if he’d had his beer.
Sometimes I think we should just give people what they need.
This article appeared last year. It made an impression on me. https://www.washingtonpost.com/sf/local/2017/07/21/how-disability-benefits-divided-this-rural-community-between-those-who-work-and-those-who-dont/?utm_term=.083ca122df21
Most of us have limited funds for charity. We can’t give everyone what they want/need, so we try to direct our giving to where it’s most useful in supporting the cause we want to support.
Personally, our causes are medical, education, helping with “basic” needs such as food, clothing, shelter, and supporting our faith. With medical we sometimes give to individuals as long as we’re sure we know the situation. It helps them pay bills - either medical or all the other stuff that comes with a medical problem (like loss of job income). With all others we give to organizations that can pool our donations to do the most good for the most people - some local, some worldwide. I do research on the organizations to make my best guess at which ones truly use the money correctly vs high paid executives or using too much on fund raising.
Once in a while we make exceptions with the others, but again, we know the situation. I know the kid I give a couple of bucks to needs it for lunch money. I know the kid I’m helping afford the field trip.
With limited funds, I just like having best odds of it actually being used for causes I want it to go toward.
I’ve belonged to churches that have sponsored meals for those in need, but where the parishioners were still regularly “worked” for cash. Currently, there is a woman who drives her car to our church and stands outside the door as people are exiting with a sign “Please help. I need food for my children.” Sometimes she has some kids with her. I have invited her in when coffee and doughnuts are being served, she wants cash. I am certain I am meant to feel guilty about leaving a church and not leaving a hand out, but I find involving her children is despicable and know there are many agencies and resources available to her in our community (and she is driving a decent looking car). Perhaps I am just cynical. Any thoughts on how to handle this?
If she won’t accept food, I would think a church employee could ask her to leave.
i rarely give to those at stoplights/signs, but did recently when it was pouring rain outside. That man looked so sad.
Years ago i was in the grocery store, and asked a random guy if he “had the time?” . . . and he thought i had asked him if he “Had a dime?” . . . and he said “NO. NO. dont have a dime or any money” ---- and then he walked off. I sort of thought that was rude at the time, like who doesnt have one dime to spare if that’s what i had really asked! But now, i get it – it’s not smart to pull out your wallet or purse and give to people like that; its risky.
my Bay Area sister was just astounded by the amount of homeless when she moved there. She now just gives to groups who help, but not to anyone personally. She works occasionally with Colin Powell 
and once escorted him a few blocks through the city. Some homeless people recognized him and shouted out to him. He took the time to stop and shake their hands and give words of encouragement. (but no money). I Love that guy!
I know that if I hand a water bottle or a $5 or a granola bar to a panhandler, I might be giving these things to someone who is part of a scam and doesn’t “deserve” it. But I have a lot of good things I don’t deserve, and I can’t help but think that if panhandling is what you do for a living, you’re definitely in desperate need of something. What, I don’t know, but money and water are what I can give, so I do. This really is a personal decision.
Passed a “Will work for food sign”. Bought some food and gave it to them. Driving away looked back and they were throwing the food in the garbage.
A statement that really stuck with me by a local organization:
“As a rule, the homeless are NOT panhandlers and panhandlers are NOT homeless”
Locally we have taken to serious observation and have found that the majority of panhandlers have iPhones and we always look at at their shoes. Amazing some of the expensive shoes being worn.
I volunteer at local food pantry and food is always available both in the form of groceries and in daily hot meals. Donations to these organizations help out the community and the needy much more than giving to panhandlers.
Thanks for posting that article @sabaray . The article reminded me of the book “Hillbilly Elegy”. If you haven’t read it, you might find it interesting. My heart breaks for people like those families and I don’t know what the answer is.
So, I dont give at street corners but still want to say we can be kind. That does include how we speak of panhandlers. We dont know another’s circumstances until we know them. We can lean on police or TV reports in making our decisions. But often I hear a basic distrust of so many who are in need.
Think about it. It surprises me how easily judgmental we can be. I dont think that’s enough. Sorry.