<p>* But I’m just afraid of the pressure that my father will put on me if he doesn’t think they’re good enough.*</p>
<p>Oh dear, this is one of the reasons that I (with my instructor hat on) don’t like giving grades when I’m teaching other people’s children.</p>
<p>My heart goes out to you. Some parents do place a huge value on grades, sometimes all out of proportion to their true importance.</p>
<p>(My parents always downplayed grades. I gather it’s because my dad, who was really quite intelligent and creative, had a rather checkered academic record himself. When we were in K-12, the only grades that mattered were our conduct and effort grades. As long as our teachers said that we were behaving and trying hard, they didn’t care about the other grades we got. Of course, they were pleased when we did well in our academic grades, but they never gave us grief when things didn’t go so well, as long as our teachers said we were behaving and trying hard. I remember that my parents would always take us out to dinner–a special treat as we never went out otherwise–to celebrate our report cards. But the only thing that would keep a sibling from getting to go was a poor grade in effort or conduct. And in college, I don’t ever remember my parents asking for information about grades or complaining about that C in freshman English.)</p>
<p>It’s great that you have such a close relationship with your mom and that you would feel comfortable sharing your grades with her. It sounds as though you are confident that she will agree with you that your grades are good. </p>
<p>I imagine that it is likely that your dad cares about you a great deal (even if he is demonstrating his concern in a way that I would not choose).</p>
<p>Because you feel so comfortable communicating with your mother, perhaps you could share your concerns with her and come up with a plan for coping with your dad’s possible reactions to your grades. Perhaps he will be more understanding than you think. Perhaps you could enlist your mom’s support in helping your dad to appreciatie that your grades do represent good work on your part.</p>