<p>Ive been following this thread. Its interesting. I think a lot of people think they know a lot about other peoples lives and choices, but they dont. </p>
<p>My H is a physician. We married before he started med school and paid for med school with student loans. I do work and have always worked. We were able to dig ourselves out of the student debt hole, but not without making major life choices. The biggest was moving from the northeast to a less costly area of the southeast. We dont have any family support nearby. When the kids were sick in elementary school, if I couldnt get out of work, my husband would take them to work with him and let them sleep in his office (he did keep them away from his patients). He definitely couldnt get out of work to stay home with them, and without family nearby, we just tried to make it work. It wasnt easy.</p>
<p>Speaking of my work, heres a little side story of something someone actually said to me when H finished med school and started his residency. I was teaching special ed at the time. I was told that doctors wives shouldnt be teaching and taking a job away from someone who really needs it. Really? We were knee deep in student debt, H was making a residents salary, we had no property, and we drove a very used Chevy Chevette and lets not forget to mention that I got a degree because I wanted to teach. Some people really are clueless.</p>
<p>It seems doctor lifestyles vary in different regions. On my street and the next street over there are 4 doctors, all specialists of one kind or another. The house prices range from ~300K-450K (and less expensive when first purchased many years ago). There are not any BMWs or Mercedes in the driveways, just Hondas, Nissans, Toyotas, and pick-up trucks. If you look at the doctors parking lot at our hospital, it is pretty similar. Now, we definitely have nice lives, just not the multimillion dollar lives people are mentioning we have. I do know doctors who live in million plus dollar homes and drive exceptionally nice cars; its just not the majority around here. </p>
<p>As far as my Hs work, he has always been a hospital employee. A few years ago, our hospital merged with a larger hospital and its healthcare system. Other smaller hospitals have also merged with this larger system. My H now covers two hospitals, instead of just the original one where he was hired, and they just hired their first PA to add to their group of 3 doctors. He likes the new hospital and the doctors and other staff he works with, but he also works his butt off shuffling back and forth between the two hospitals. The new PA is also working out, although her exact role is still being defined. Some of the other specialist groups are also now covering our hospital and this other, smaller hospital. It also seems many of the private specialist groups are joining the larger healthcare system.</p>
<p>BUandBC82: Sounds to me like you made sensible choices for all of your family priorities, and it’s worked out OK for you. (Your story is a lot like my family’s, right down to the “Why are you taking a job away from someone who needs it” comments to my wife) except I’m a lawyer. I’ve got no complaints and it doesn’t sound to me like you do either. </p>
<p>I think the controversy comes from folks who think that the career paths and financial choices we were required to make are somehow “beneath” a doctor. I don’t see any problem with it.</p>
<p>What if the cost of maintaining your mortgage AND a rental is mroe than you earn? </p>
<p>What if the cost of daycare is more than you earn?</p>
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<p>And therein lies the rub. Great, say 'here is what I did" but gosh, step back for once and think: just because that is YOU does not mean it has relevance for anyone else! </p>
<p>For years on CC you’ve been stating <em>your personal experience</em> (or that of your kids) in very factual and generalizable terms…with very very oversimplified advice and opinions as if your little experience tells us anything about the world in general. Like all of us, you live in a bubble that does not at all reflect everyone else’s constraints and demands and realities. <em>JUST BECAUSE IT IS TRUE FOR YOU</em> DOES NOT MAKE IT REMOTELYTRUE FOR OTHERS! The big difference is you seem unable to grasp this point. </p>
<p>I give up…I’ve said this for years now, and many others have as well, but you just don’t get it.</p>
<p>BUandBC82… thanks for your story…I enjoyed it. and thanks for being a special ed teacher…and the people that complain about your life’s choices…screw them.</p>
<p>And the move to North Dakota comments…I can’t believe educated people make these comments…</p>
<p>great post BU… same situation basically here…in practice 27 years , H works much harder now for less reimbursement. spends more time on pre-certs, pre-authorizations, over-rides for pharmacies (all of which is not re-imbursed), covers 2 hospitals, as well as his practice. works about 60-70 hours per week. Took years to pay off loans, We have a nice house purchased when things were better. i drive a little suzuki, H drives an old van… I have worked in H’s office since he opened…usually about 50 hours per week, most of the Dr’s wives i know do work.
The silliness of insurance companies is becoming overwhelming… last year we were not paid anything for 6 months because our suite number changed…and care/caid/bc/etc had to have all new applications filled out, new numbers issued, licenses issued, address verified etc…so from january to june no checks issued.</p>
<p>Parent56, are you in a major metropolitan area? I do know spouses of DRs who do work but they are new docs,young with debt…i know not one over the age of 40± whose spouse works</p>
<p>no qdogpa, small rural area, not the best area for re-imbursement either. solo practice no coverage, 24/7 call. but please dont think we are complaining…we have a good life and income, have put 5 kids through school (only one left to go) but just stating it is not always the huge income wonderful career some seem to think it is.</p>
<p>Gee, how many doctor’s spouses do you know so you can make an generalization?</p>
<p>I AM a physician’s wife, age over 50 and I work and no, we don’t have any student loans to repay. I also know many other physician’s wives, age 50+ who work.</p>
<p>Re post 123, with all due respects, starbright, I see you comment liberally on a lot of US topics such as healthcare, jobs, college life, life in general, the economy etc etc and you don’t even live in this country.</p>
<p>So, this is an open forum…anyone can express his/her opinion.</p>
<p>"What if the cost of maintaining your mortgage AND a rental is more than you earn?</p>
<p>What if the cost of daycare is more than you earn?"</p>
<p>If you realize you do what you need to do to support your family, you make it happen. You rent out the house you can’t sell (big rental market out there now). You find a low budget apartment. You work opposite shifts so you don’t have to get daycare. People are always full of I can’t, I can’t. But they just want to do what’s easy, not what is necessary. Of course, we would have done ANYTHING other than staying with our parents when we were laid off, so it was a clear choice. There are always options, they just aren’t always pleasant or easy.</p>
<p>Gosh, because I say that someone who has invested 12 years of time post secondary education should not need to go to rural North Dakota (I have nothing against rural ND by the way…) if they don’t want to, I am suddenly elitist and whiny I guess. </p>
<p>No whines here. I practice very happily outside the US. I had $107,500 in student debt when I graduated 30 years ago and I paid back every penny with no complaint. In the first 10 years it was the equivalent of making 2 mortgage payments per month. I am grateful to practice medicine, it is a privilege. I/we have made family decisions based on the feasibility of 2 disparate careers and have lived, because of those choices, far from extended family and friends. But, it was our choice. </p>
<p>And, we did not do it because lawyers, politicians, insurance companies, cranky patients, MBA health administrators thought we should-- to be non-elitist that is. We worked hard, we delayed gratification, we invested time and money and sweat equity in our future. </p>
<p>Really, there is something wrong with that?</p>
<p>I know lots of doctors. My father was a doctor; one of my sisters, a brother-in-law, and numerous social acquaintences. A few are wealthy. All (except my late father) are at least what I’d call affluent. (I consider myself affluent, and yes, I drive an old pickup truck.) All I can say as a generalization is that none went broke practicing medicine. I’ve seen doctors get in financial trouble from bad business decisions (or, in my father’s case, bad business decisions, two divorces and some bad health) I don’t know a single doctor who “went broke” because the work doesn’t pay the bills. One of the most well off doctors I know gets indignant at Obamacare (and just about everything else) and insists that he’ll shut down his practice before putting up with the outrages he sees. He’s a millionaire - he can if he wants. But I’m very much aware that there are many doctors like Parent56 and BUandBC82’s husband - who had to address financial issues, did so successfully, and are doing fine - not “rich” mind you, but comfortable.</p>
<p>I don’t think that overstating things and injecting over the top drama into the discussion is helpful. Doctors aren’t “going broke” right and left because of changes in the financial aspects of the practice of medicine. I understand that the business part of medicine - particularly for a small practice - has to be incredibly frustrating. (My wife is currently working with the wife of a doctor who runs a small clinic, helping her handle some of the business details of the practice.) I’d like to see that changed; I really haven’t heard anything good about the whole insurance/Medicare/Medicaid reimbursement systems.</p>
<p>But overstating the case is not helpful. We’re not going to “lose the best and brightest.” Potential doctors are not going to suddenly decide en masse to go into IB or law or something else - that’s just dumb.</p>
<p>And yes: somebody has to provide medical services to people in North Dakota. It’s not Hell, it’s just cold.</p>