I have always done things alone quite happily. Getting married and having a family and being surrounded by people all the time has been tough for me. Now and then I get to be alone again and it is delicious.
I don’t like going to parties alone when I am not sure I will know anyone. That is about the only thing I don’t like doing alone. Events with more structure, like concerts or plays or athletic events, I can handle.
I’ve always been a believer in that you don’t need an entourage to enjoy yourself. Of course if/when you travel for business there are plenty of times you find yourself alone. I always have a book or a magazine and will enjoy a nice dinner for myself although I generally won’t wander too far from the hotel. I certainly have tried to see sites that interest me when I am away for business if I have the time- went to the 6th Floor Museum and Dealey Plaza in Dallas once on a trip, once I went on a tour to Muir Woods when in SF and found a free day. I will go to museums by myself frequently, I will sometimes go to an afternoon movie, especially if it is a film I am interested in and DH not so much, and I generally prefer to go shopping by myself.
I can do most everything alone, but travel with a group. My travel agent says some groups are geared towards singles, but still I hesitate.
The PCT is awesome. As you say, bikes are prohibited on it. There’s a road bike route that goes along the Sierra and the Cascades, crossing the PCT many times. It’s called the Sierra Cascades route. I did it in 2012. From time to time, we’d come across PCT through-hikers, looking even more scruffy than we were. I love that they all have trail names.
Thanks to this article, I did have a lovely drive along the cliffs overlooking the ocean to go shopping at a boutique for lingerie–ALONE! It was great! H politely declined the offer to go shopping and stayed home. I have traveled a bit alone, as has H, both of us for work. We both are so busy working, there isn’t as much time for sightseeing as we might otherwise enjoy.
Cardinal Fang, am impressed as well. I had never heard of that trail. Hope you can keep us informed of your progress. it sounds tough. I rented a bike once in Aspen, and headed off, quickly realizing, no way could I ride a thin trail on a bike. Crushed gravel yes, dirt roads yes, but trails, no.
Anxiousmom, sympathies. What a hard transition.
For safety reason, wouldn’t you want to have a partner when biking?
I also tend to go shopping alone. Its just easier.
I don’t really have the opportunity to be alone much. I’ve never really stayed alone - I grew up sharing a bedroom, had college roommates, moved home, got married, had kids - I’ve never had my own place and only recently did I stay in a hotel room alone when hubby ended up in the ER overnight.
I definitely run errands alone and I’m home alone during the days. I’ve never gone to a movie alone, and I’ve eaten in places like panera’s alone, but I wouldn’t go to a nice restaurant alone. Obviously I’ve never been on vacation alone. I wouldn’t enjoy a trip or show without a companion.
I do worry sometimes, probably way too much, about how lonely I’d be if hubby died first.
oldfort, strictly, yes, a companion is a good idea. Some of us don’t have that luxury, thus choosing to set off and make one’s way alone can be incredibly empowering and liberating. Having lived in the West and Midwest, I do see it more as part of the history and ethic of the far West.
Having dealt with a lot of loneliness over the years, I found a way through from a book. So you are lonely, accept that emotion. And then what are you going to do next? I like the point of the article, which is that people usually feel better if they just go and do, rather than avoiding going out alone.
I enjoy doing things by myself. When H and I decided to divorce in the early fall, I intentionally made myself do MORE things alone so I could get past any discomfort I felt. I saw lots of movies, attended social functions, alone. I’m not going to NOT do something I want to do because I don’t have company.
@CardinalFang I’m very excited for you and so impressed! please keep us posted.
I’m an introvert, and sometimes I would rather be alone, than even with my H, even though " generally", he is also an introvert, and is comfortable with companionable silence. But he still talks more than I do, about random stuff anyway, even with strangers, yet, he rarely asks for directions or advocates for us, if we need a change in accommodations, or other things.
So even though I like traveling with him, if I am going to have to be my own advocate all the time, it can be less stressful, to be alone, and it’s exhilarating to not have to be concerned with anyone else’s needs or interests.
I don’t usually read when eating by myself,unless it is a newspaper at breakfast, but I find that is a good time to write.
I had never flown by myself, but 7 yrs ago when I was 50, I took a short trip to Santa Barbara to see a pair of concerts, and had a fabulous time.(even at 50, that was only my third trip by air) I had never been there before & admittedly Santa Barbara is not exotic and everyone speaks English, but it still was a big step for me. I took a bus from the airport to my hotel, which was on the main drag, and it was walking distance to the theatre. After the second show, I was still so pumped up that I went to a bar, where a related cover band was playing, and met lots of nice people, mostly a friendly couple that were about my age, which made listening to the music and even dancing more comfortable.
Except for the flying part, ( I am claustrophobic), I would love to do it again.
Im actually looking for a short retreat kind of thing to do, this summer, but just deciding how structured I can stand.