It so disgusting how people are defending him by saying it was a mistake. I’m a teenager and my mistakes are leaving the light on when I go to sleep of forgetting to wash the dishes. MOLESTING a child is not a mistake. It’s a deliberate action made by a sick predator. And oh my gosh, the irony of Michelle warning people about transsexual predators when her very own son was molesting (and probably raping) young girls right under her nose. Of course the records were destroyed though. Jim Bob has his cult-y hands in Arkansas politics.
They ARE being ripped apart. And I truly feel for the children who were involved. But you can’t only play it to your advantage when it comes to media attention. When you are in the limelight, your dirty laundry gets aired out. And in this particular case, where victims are involved, it would be immoral to hide what happened. The parents made a choice to display their family on TV and perhaps advance their own righteous agenda. They knew of the abuse situation and should have known this would inevitably leak out.
So they are being “ripped apart” but it is based on their own actions. And as hard as it is for America to accept that the face of an abuser can be the face of a Duggar, it is an important lesson. This is not about religion.
the Duggars seem to subscribe to a religion that believes that it is better to ask forgiveness, than permission.
But as long as you are a straight white male, and you asked for forgiveness, it is A OK.
Carry on, with no guilty conscience or even atonement.
Agree completely. This has literally kept me awake. I am NOT an avid Duggar fan. I do NOT agree with all they do and how they raise their family, but I DID admire their seeming willingness to stick by what they believed. Now this. It’s sad to realize that they have such an awful thing in their family.
But this:
Where do you get “a religion that believes it is better to ask forgiveness than permission”???
I do not believe that they have carried on “…with no guilty conscience or even atonement”. And if they have, then they will be judged for that, but not by me.
Listen, please…I am NOT trying to defend them. I just hate seeing “religion” bashed about as the root of evil. It breaks my heart…maybe because long ago I felt that way too.
^^^Then what changed? Why do you feel differently now?
They sure seem to be saying that God has forgiven him, so it is time for everyone else to move on. It was just some bad behavior. And, after all, he did get a stern talking to from a family friend. And worked on a construction project for three months. They prayed on it, all good now. Right?
I find it quite hypocritical that the same Huckabee who supports tough juvenile crime crime penalties is perfectly ok with Josh Duggar getting away with not even a slap on the wrist. Perfectly fine to hold teen criminals accountable, but when it is the son of your good friend and supporter, it was just, "Good people make mistakes and do regrettable and even disgusting things.” Nice to see how that goes along with his previous statements on crime: “We’ve got to quit locking up all the people that we’re mad at and lock up the people that we’re really afraid of, the people who are sexual predators and violent offenders.” Like his good friend Josh.
Just as we want people NOT to assume this is less than it seems, we also want people not to assume it is MORE. Not yet, okay? It would be rational to check what we can and wait to see if more comes out. I mean, we have no reason, at this point, to suspect he is a rapist. We only know what we know.
Can I just try this?
I think CMMom is saying, in part, if we don’t like the exclusionary “us vs them” some religions play, then let’s not do it back. Eg, atheists versus all believers. And I suppose that can also be extended to not thinking the attitudes of one or two posters are those of all posters.
Huckabee is going to do more damage to his position if he doesn’t watch it.
Perhaps Huckabee is afraid that if he criticizes Josh Duggar, people will be reminded of his own son’s unappetizing past, including allegations that the reason he was dismissed as a Boy Scout camp counselor was that he killed a stray dog by hanging it. See http://www.newsweek.com/sons-past-could-come-back-bite-huckabee-94351.
Disgusting people and grotesque hypocrites, the whole crowd.
Alright, molestation is not a mistake. It is a sin, a grievous and sickening one.
DonnaL,
The “whole crowd” = Duggar apologists or Christians in general?
This whole situation is sad. I know as a parent I’d have a hard time thinking the police ( you know, like the guy the Duggars turned to for “help”) would do a better job of turning around my disturbed child than I could. Of course there’s no way my kid would have remained in my home with his younger sisters…seems to me there would be a residential setting with trained counsellors that would have been a better option.
Another aside…earlier mention was made about not liking the Duggars–even the girls, and the tiny ones. Sad, really, and it seems to be piling on. (Not liking the girls/tiny ones) And adding in about Michelle’s confession about her bulimia–not sure why that is relevant. I hope we can stop piling on…it’s horrifically bad as it is, and lives have been ruined by the actions of Josh, and his parents. I can only hope that the girls can move forward, and not be forever marred by this event and the resulting media attention.
Guess I am included in that “whole crowd”, right? I have most definitely said one thing and done the complete opposite of what I meant to do—many many times. Over and over. And will again, I am sure.
yep.
I became one of those disgusting, grotesque hypocrites who believe in a Savior and in forgiveness. And who realizes that I am indeed a disgusting, grotesque hypocrite. I strive to be better and t am thankful that I do not strive alone. I also do an awful job of expressing that, though. And this is not the place… I do NOT want anyone here to think I am saying they are somehow less than I am or I am better than they are…indeed quite the opposite is true.
I am and have always most afraid of being perceived as coming across as “holier than thou”. Please forgive me if that is what I have inadvertently done here.
Again, back to the Duggars: I join with “lookingforward” in asking that we not make assumptions beyond what is known fact about this situation. Also that we accept at face value the family saying they have felt guilt, remorse, shock, grief, etc… about this.
Oh please zeke. I don’t think ANYONE could read Donna’s post and think she was talking about all Christians.
Stop looking for things that aren’t there.
I did. See above.
also, this:
I am pretty sure I also would not immediately (or perhaps ever) wish to get the police involved as long as I felt the situation had been dealt with where the perpetrator would change his ways and the victims were helped. And, according to reports I have read, the Duggars did try to do those things. They DID send their son away …was it to the kind of place many of you would have sent him? Nope…but apparently they were satisfied at the time that he’d changed or overcome or whatever you want to say. The Duggars have also said the victims received counseling.
Question: in all earnestness, I ask what exactly would you now have happen to Josh, to his parents, to the family. If you ran the zoo, that is. How would you make this all better? Short of having a time-turner-thingy like in Harry Potter?
Well, it looks like you are wrong.
Stop assuming you know how others will read statements like that.
Well as I’ve said many times, some people just look for reasons to be offended.
I am truly curious what was meant by the “whole crowd”. I can only assume the reference was to Christians as we are all indeed hypocrites. If you know someone personally who professes to be a Christian, ask them if they are perfect. …if they ALWAYS do what they mean to do…to be good… I am pretty sure the answer will be no.
So, hey, even though I don’t think DonnaL meant the “disgusting hypocrites” description to be in any way flattering, it is accurate and I am not offended.
Me: “That Duggar guy goes around saying gays are child molesters, and meanwhile he’s a child molester himself!”
My buddy: “Maybe that’s his way of saying he’s gay.”
@romanigypsyeyes I agree…people who feel backed into a corner often will “look for reasons to be offended”. Just as many who feel very strongly about a matter will opt not to consider that their words may be misinterpreted. The written word is tricky…we all need to check our filters on occasion.
Btw…this was not really addressed to Romani–it’s just her comment came last. It’s a general statement on how easily we can offend, or take offense on an anonymous message board. Be kind.
There is a huge difference between forgiveness and accountability. Forgiveness comes from realizing nothing can be done to repair a damage that was done and that the only way to get rid of the pain that was caused is to give up a desire for restitution or repair (ex. forgiving a debt). Forgiveness does not in any excuse what was done or not hold the offender up to accountability.
I have forgiven the relative who sexually abused me for three years as a young child. But I would never have asked him to baby sit, and I avoid speaking with him at family get togethers as much as I can without causing a scene. Carrying a grudge against him only caused ME pain - didn’t hurt him at all. So forgiveness was not about him, but about me (and, since I am a Christian, about Christ).
One might forgive the Duggars for their actions and failures to act, but hold them accountable for making blanket statements that all homosexuals or transgendered people are child abusers, knowing that the majority of sex offenders are heterosexual males, or presenting themselves as such huge promoters of purity, including an episode which focused on Josh’s being educated about marital sex by his parents on the night before his wedding and making a huge deal about how he saved his first kiss and hug for his wedding day (since we all know now that that was a lie).