I would say that the biggest college choice a student has is the most basic choice: whether or not to even attend college after completing high school (at least right away). Is this almost 100% a decision to be made by the parent(s)?
I started college at 17 and was (supposed to be) restricted to the all female dorm. It turned out they put me in a co-ed dorm (single sex on each floor).
My daughter started at 17 and there were some forms I had to sign. IIRC, anything medical, and anything NCAA related (drug testing and releasing those results), some travel forms.
It wasn’t a big deal. I signed a ton of forms anyway, so what was 4-5 more?
There were a few scholarship programs my daughter couldn’t apply for because she wasn’t 18. They were government programs. There were also government internships she wouldn’t have been allowed to take because she would have had to be 18, but most of those were for the summer following freshman year and by then she was 18.
Parent(s) can almost prevent a kid from attending college immediately after high school if they want. This is not to say that most parents will actually do that if college is financially affordable.
Again, this is a something that parents have the power to do, even though only very authoritarian or otherwise extreme parents will actually do that.
I was thinking in terms of the other way around – a kid who doesn’t want to attend college after high school, at least not right away. Does a parent have almost 100% of the decision in a case like this, if the parent wants the kid to start college?
None of these examples are a school restricting a 17 year old student from doing something that an 18 year old could do.
If the kid who does not want to start college at all is able to be financially self supporting (outside of the parents’ house), then no. Otherwise, an authoritarian-enough parent can apply considerable pressure on the kid to attend college, though a rebellious-enough kid can (self-destructively) intentionally get rejected everywhere, flunk out of community college, etc…
However, if the kid wants to start college after one gap year, a parent can veto that by refusing to pay (or cooperate on financial aid forms) unless the kid goes to college immediately after high school.
She was restricted from registering because the medical forms were required and if I didn’t sign them, she couldn’t have attended. She also could not have used the medical facility if I didn’t sign a form allowing her, at 17, to receive medical services. An 18 year old (at least in Florida) has the right to her own medical records, so an 18 year old could have registered and requested any medical services she wanted.
I don’t know if there were things my daughter couldn’t have done even with a form signed by me. I think she could not have driven a school vehicle, even a golf cart. There may have been jobs she couldn’t have as her school has a lot of government contracts and some of them required the student workers to be at least 18 and a citizen - the citizen requirement was called into question a lot more than the age requirement.
The town I grew up in had a curfew for those under 18. It also had a university and students had to comply. No, not a school rule but a law that affected those under 18. I remember a guy in my dorm was furious that he’d been off campus and was picked up for breaking curfew. He was 18 but didn’t have an ID with him and he couldn’t reach any of his roommates to bring him an ID because they were all out at the bars.
Parents can influence the decision by how independent they will force their child to be. If a parent is unhappy that an 18-year old who has unilaterally decided to not attend college but work at the local grocery store and buy a new car, that parent might decide it’s time for that child to live on his own and enjoy all the benefits of being an adult. A parent may decide it’s a learning experience to have to figure out how to pay rent, utilities, feed oneself, cell phone, car note, etc, out of $10/hr.
If a child is faced with living completely on his/her own with absolutely no parental financial assistance, or go to college as the parent desires, the child may feel the decision has been taken out of his/her hands.
IMO, while I would not say the parent has 100% control over the decision, cutting off all financial assistance moves the needle away from the child having 100% control over the decision. Again, in my opinion, very few middle-class children are going to decide to live in poverty in order to avoid attending college.
Are there really boarding schools where one can graduate early??
I am not familiar with any unless there are truly exceptional circumstances. However I am willing to be educated!
^^ I recall that @SculptorDad 's D was going to graduate from Grier a year early and had been accepting at Mines. Changed her mind - stayed the extra (senior) year and chose a different school. There wasn’t a compelling reason behind it.
All of these restrictions can be cured by a parent. If the school is not allowing something, it’s because a parent is refusing to act. The school is simply following a law regarding minors; the school is not setting or enforcing its own restrictions.