You need to put a “not for sale” sticky on things that are not for sale. Or plan to be at the sale along with the estate person.
I’d do blue tape or more, not a sticky that can be easily removed. I’d also have a list of all the NOT for sale items and get the company to sign it. Probably a good idea to be present for sale, just in case.
DO they know what items they are taking to the AL facility? I just (about) finished cleaning out my parents house after their move to CCRC. It has taken MONTHS to get the house ready for market.
They have a trusted handyman friend of the family. He has been a godsend… If you have a lot of stuff to dispose of, we found it helpful to do it in stages. One room I designated for actual trash/throw out. Another area was items in good shape but not needed, to go to a thrift shop or rummage sale. Another area was items that the parents wanted in their new place. And a HUGE pile of things I need to have moved to my house to go thru - al dad’s research and career items (to be reviewed before trashing or disposing), photos, memorabilia, jewelry, etc. I will have to rent a small storage unit until I can go thru it all.
The handyman kept me on track and executed everything. I would leave piles marked trash and he would dispose of it, corral all the rummage items together and so forth. We are now at the point where there are a few pieces of furniture that are probably sell-able (no antiques etc). The real estate agent and a friend are trying to post them on local yard sale pages.
Auctioneers will take care of everything, down to getting rid of what’s left over.
You must check everywhere for treasures. A friend’s FIL hid money behind the mantle. He was a hoarder to boot. They found thousands around the house. The money behind the mantle was partially mouse eaten. They had to take the partial bills to a bank to get exchanged. It was a mess.
My mom became seriously ill very suddenly and died three weeks later. When my brother decided to go through the refrigerator and freezer, he found $1200 wrapped in foil in the freezer. When we mentioned this to another brother who lives out of the country, B2 told us that Mom had told him it was there and it was her “cold, hard cash”.
We also found hundreds of dollars in coins in numerous places.
I can’t imagine having been ready for an estate sale in two weeks time.
My father died recently. I had gone through his things in a storage unit a few months ago and then cleared it all out after he died. His wife refused to see my sister and I so we couldn’t access any of his recent paperwork or personal items. As awful as that was, I’m glad he had pared down so it wasn’t an overwhelming amount of stuff.
My in-laws are a different story. MIL collects antiques and owns hundreds, maybe thousands, of pretty little tea cups! I will gladly help them go through their things so they can downsize while alive and happy. They should take the money and go live it up in Europe for a month or two. Unfortunately, they are still in the complete denial phase. Why cling to the 2 story + basement house and all the stuff when you’re over 80? They’re finding it hard to do stairs or even bend down to put something in a low trashcan. Let it be a lesson to us all to not get too attached to things.
We did a huge dumpster a couple of years ago, they have lived in the house nearly 50 years so it needed to be done! MIL has been disabled a long time, she used to hide stuff before, but she could not manage now, theoretically FIL knows where it all is.
I don’t see this as hijacked at all, these are all good stories. My sister was robbed recently & when I travel I hide my jewelry & home cash in all different spots, I also email myself and my DDs where they stuff is, just in case…because I hide it so well, I would forget!
I talked to an estate person and they are thinking minimum of two weeks after we meet, which is to be after all the stuff that is not for sale is moved, which will likely be about Thanksgiving! I will try to push on this so we can do the sale before the holidays, if they even decide the stuff is worth a sale!!
Keep the stories coming!
Get everything itemized. I think the people who sold the items in my late dads house robbed us blind, but they also cleaned out the place and that was invaluable (though we paid through the nose).
I would completely forget wherever I hid something. I can’t even imagine how well I’ll be able to forget things when I’m 30 years older!~
Another lesson, going through my Dad’s old stuff, we found some really great photographs. Who are the other people in them and where and why were they taken? If it was in his post-childhood and pre-marriage days, we could only guess. It would have been so much better to go through all this WITH him 10 years ago and help him downsize, rather than him putting it in a box in the garage and forgetting about it. I will try to remember this!
OTOH, his mother was amazingly organized. She must have given each of her children a folder with copies of important family documents. Her baptismal certificate and marriage license. Letters to and from an older brother who died in WWII. Newspaper clippings and photographs. Everything is annotated. Thank you Grandma! I hope I put my OCD tendencies to such a good use as well.
I have two photo albums like that from 1915-1930? - I think they were my grandparents - have no idea who 90% of the people are and there’s noone left to ask.
I have a steamer trunk in my garage chock full of old photographs. I don’t know who any of those people are!
As for as stuff, I am going to give away my extra stuff to my kids when they set up a house or apartment. It’s silly to hold onto stuff I don’t need or want while my kids spend on stuff I could just give them.
Just do your due diligence on estate sale company. Local estate sale company here has a load of law suits against it for not paying promised amount (of what actually sold, not estimate). Word has gotten around that they are not trustworthy but they are still operating and advertising new sales
If there are lots of old photographs and you don’t want them, offer them to the local historical society. They may know who people are and there might be some background in photos that give a glimpse of the town’s history.
@TatinG said,
We’re in the process of emptying my Mom’s house and the problem is our three adult “kids” all live in small apartments in large city’s. As much as the would like some of the stuff - beds, dressers, kitchen table, etc., they just don’t have room for it. I’m hoping that I can take just a few pieces and some old kitchen things and give to my kids when they have more space. I find it depressing emptying my Mom’s house knowing that the things she thought were special and really liked don’t hold that appeal to our family. A good lesson about stuff.
When my grandparents broke up housekeeping we kept very little of their antique furniture. It was the heavy Victorian type that is too big, too heavy and completely out of style.
As to the photographs, one sees them in antique stores. Old photographs of severe looking people in ornate frames. It seems sad that either their family died out or that no one remembers them or remembers stories of them and therefore, no one wanted to keep the photos. Forgotten people whose photos are gathering dust up for sale.
Prior to her death my mother assembled 3 albums for me. (I am an only child). Two were from her side and the other…my father’s side. My mother identified every person she could. I am doing that now, although I don[t expect to die soon.
When my mom died, I put together a photo album from her photos…one for each of my kids. Every picture is labeled, and dated. Most are of my mom and her family when she was young.
I also took a large Rubbermaid bin, and put things in it for each of my kids…from my mom. These bins are in my attic now, and maybe my kids will want them…and maybe not. But it’s one bin each.
I do agree with walkinghome. Much of the stuff we have, our kids have no interest in owning. Ever.
The other issue I have is that both live a trek away, and shipping to them would be very costly.
But before I got rid of stuff, I made sure that fami,y members had things they wanted. Beyond that, my goal was to get it out of my house (which took me about 10 years…).
If anyone lives near a major city, you might want to check out ETBH (Everything but the House) on the web. They are quickly expanding across the US. It is an estate sale company, but all sales are done online (like EBay). They come into the home, catalogue and photo everything with your input. Profits are divided (not sure of the percentage to each).