thanks for all the comments.
yes $500 at fafsa first filing day, spent down prior to filing upon my advice.
w-2 coop income
We are going to try one more thing before talking to finaid person.
reduce 44f (coop income) by enough to make it affect EFC in a minimal positive manner according to my calculations.
So basically report 44f as $5400 instead of $10000 (it should be ok to report less than what it is)
That would make the student contribution form AI = $20 (instead of negative in my calculations)
so total EFC should be $120.
This will help with 2 things:
maybe once all the negative numbers in the calculations go away, everything just works
or
EFC is unchanged with a reduction in 44f
Either of these outcomes should indicate that currently they are ignoring 44f.
IF EFC is unchanged with a reduction in 44f that would be ammunition when talking to finaid office.
If EFC goes up, then I dont know what it could be, but I cannot see how that could happen, as I currently believe the it is already assuming 44f equal zero in the calculations.
Maybe some of you think my relationship with my ex is too non-adversarial.
My current wife thinks the same thing! 
I think it helps that we used mediators instead of lawyers.
Don’t worry, I will come back and let everyone know the progress and outcome.