<p>I hear ya. My older brother and my older sister were both “ridded” because they didn’t do well in their first year at college. One strike, they were out. My brother never really recovered and began a long downward spiral. My sister funded her own education many years later, and became an RN. I kept my grades up and got some help all the way through to graduation, but my dad loved that I had a *ton *of skin in the game.</p>
<p>Although I want them to have some skin in the game, it’s not what I expect of my kids. I take into consideration–as I would when hearing of any particular parenting style–my own parents’ values and background. My father was a product of the depression, and the necessity, if not cultural value, of his day was something like this: “Everyone the hell out of the house at 18: You’re on your own now.” He was grateful that he was able to go to B.U. on the GI bill–the first and only one in his family to attend college–and he was willing to help with college expenses to a degree, but with big stipulations, including “one strike, you’re out.”</p>
<p>I am happy to report that my own “snowflakes,” despite being raised in a middle-class bubble of sorts, have a strong work ethic, appreciation for what they have, and a sense of obligation to make the most of the advantages they’ve received. They realize they were lucky, and I hope someday when they have the means they will find good ways to “pay it forward.”</p>