At this point, you probably aren’t talking hypotheticals any more. You know which schools she applied to and how much they will cost, what merit aid there is.
It’s too bad she doesn’t want to go to a state school. It would not be just like high school, and even if it were, why wouldn’t that be okay? Is everyone from her high school majoring in engineering? Would she even have a class with someone from hs? My daughter graduated from a Florida high school and went to Wyoming. There were two kids from her Kindergarten class, one in her dorm and another in her sorority. You’d think that going 2000 miles away would be enough to guarantee you were unique to that school, but no one gets to call ‘dibs’ on a school (my daughter wasn’t trying to avoid anyone). I think it is ridiculous to pay more for an OOS school just to avoid others from your high school but you are welcomed to pay more if that is what she wants.