I have had work trips to great locations, and sometimes I bring my children. I actually felt guilty leaving them with family the summer I was in Rome, but I couldn’t have parented and worked very well.
That is your choice and your privilege. 70K is a luxury price. When we made the decision to be full-pay at a particular college, we needed to feel we were getting value for our money. If the thought that someone, somewhere might be getting a slightly better deal really bothered us, then I would question how at ease we really were with our own financial decision. If some hypothetical person out there is an FA cheater, it really makes no difference to me and my own decisions about the best use of my resources.
Actually, there isn’t a “system.” Colleges have different financial aid policies. Is it “fair” that a student whose parents make 120K a year would get FA at Princeton but not at a state school? Is it fair that FAFSA doesn’t take into account the income of the non-custodial parent while CSS/Profile does?
Don’t count other people’s money.
I don’t know how you’d have a clue how much FA someone else was receiving, any more than you’d know how much they pay in taxes.
And I agree with NJSue. If I’m comfortable with my own financial decisions, it matters not to my own decision making. That’s between them and God (said in the non-religious sense of the word). It’s just the worst kind of nosy suburbanite to track this about other people.
I got FA and took vacations but with my own $$$–not theirs. Can be done very cheap–$200-$300 avg BITD
@thumper1 my high schooler has 2 more weeks off and the pool wants her to work pretty much every single day because all the college students are leaving!
Students that might want the same summer job next year, or a good recommendation, certainly have to be careful about asking for time off.
This summer D was late getting home and will be early leaving. I told her not to mention her end date when job hunting unless asked directly, or she might not have gotten a job at all, never mind trying to take time off for a vacation. I don’t believe she and I had a single day off in common the whole summer, so we couldn’t even do a weekend getaway or local day hike.
So I am already planning a vacation for next summer, when she will be home much earlier.
Some kids truly have to take advantage of every day during the summer to maximize their earnings. They’ll do the same over the holiday break picking up seasonal work.
My son attends a school that has a COA over $70K, gets moderate financial aid, and we do take vacations. However, we started saving for his college a few months before he was born so we were set to pay our EFC and planned and saved all along. As our income increased we saved more because we knew our EFC was going up. Our parents did not pay for our college and our goal was to pay 100% for our kids for them so we put lots of other things on the financial back burner but not vacations because we also wanted to have those family experiences.
I feel like my family definitely seems like one of those who are on FA but still manages to travel quite well (annual trips halfway around the world to the country we emigrated from plus annual long-weekend road trips). The latter is something we do since my family has always valued being able to get away for a while while the former we do because my grandparents are getting older and have a lot of health problems so it’s really important to our whole family that we spend time with them while we can and help take care of them.
We make it work by making the trips as cheap as possible (searching for the absolute cheapest plane tickets available, living with family if possible, cooking for ourselves) and minimizing the money we spend during the rest of the year. My parents drive cars they bought used 10+ years ago. We eat out maybe five times per year, don’t have cable, have minimal cellphone plans (~$10/month, no data), keep our thermostat at 18C in the winter (no a/c in the summer since it only gets up to the mid/low 30s) and only buy clothes/electronics when we really need to.
I recognize that I’m still pretty privileged for my family to be able to afford vacations at all, but I just wanted to show how my family is able to afford to travel while I’m on FA without racking up any debt.
Ah, well, we did recently take a family trip-first one with all five of us ever (We did one other family vacation 15 years ago before our third son was born). Oldest son graduated from college and got married across the country, and we were all there for 11 days. Biggest expenses were the flights, airbnb and the rehearsal lunch (which was actually ridiculously cheap for all those people). My dad couldn’t make it (he’s 89, and doesn’t travel anymore), but his money helped make it possible; we simply could not have done it without his (major) help.
And yes, we do get a lot of financial aid, and yes, oldest son did graduate debt free. He also had a yearly corporate NM scholarship and worked every summer full time plus.
I really do appreciate the enlightening comments that many of you made as to how to take great vacations without spending a boatload. As someone currently trembling under the weight of tuition at a LAC with another tuition coming down the pike, it was highly informative and gave me some great ideas.
I have less appreciation for others who expressed annoyance that I would dare to wonder about such things (I believe one referred to me as “the worst kind of nosy suburbanite.”) I gather that all the good city dwellers on CC are above this sort of thing. 
Unless you have absolutely ZERO discretionary funds, vacationing is always a possibility. Everyone spends those discretionary funds in their own way.
I sometimes wonder why a lower-income family would spend the money each week to eat out in a fairly nice restaurant (lets say $100), go to the movies every Saturday ($100 with snacks), wear North Face jackets, drive a new car, pay someone to mow their lawn, or buy junk food at the grocers…I could go on and on and on. Every little bit adds up. My family chooses to be very frugal in a lot of ways that onlookers deem strange but we vacation each year. My husband and I can go away for 10 days for about $2000, a mere $40/week. Hmmm, this is what a light smoker spends on cigarettes each week, its also what some families blow on junk food at the grocer, or what one person spends eating out lunch every day, or a few scratch tickets with your daily Dunkin Donuts coffee that costs $25/week ~ all choices in how to spend that discretionary money.
Our household is eligible for financial aid based on FAFSA; profile schools are a whole different ball game of course. I really feel for families who fall in the donut-hole, who at one time had some discretionary income but college costs have either diminished it or eliminated it all together. Usually those same families though are ones who have had an opportunity to save for retirement, have equity in real estate, or in other ways have had the ability to prepare for their futures. Some of us may choose to spend that $2000 each year taking some time from reality (vacation lol) but never really had incomes high enough to stash anything away or invest in our futures. Sometimes that break from reality is the only thing keeping me sane.
We haven’t been on “vacation” in over ten years, and that was my kids one and only trip to Disneyworld. We use our vacation time to visit out-of-state relatives and it never feels like a vacation. My kids are on financial aid but I’m really hoping we can do something special this summer–it won’t be long before they are all on their own and this might be our last chance? Lining up schedules seems to be so hard. I think people who vacation are generally healthier. Most people have to make it a priority in order for it to happen. Not only with financials but with time management. We just haven’t and it’s a regret.
@redpoodles, I hope you can manage it, especially given that the days for a family trip are getting shorter. I’ve always worked so much and I was a single parent until D turned 17 that any time we could sneak away for a long weekend or more was treasured and help us to keep connected.
Sometimes signs of extravagant spending aren’t what they seem. My D got rid of her older North Face on a local selling wall for $10. The woman that bought it seemed psyched to get one for that. I see them, and other name brands that are a lot of $ new, in our local thrift stores from time to time too.
I’ve used Groupon to afford a nicer restaurant than i might otherwise choose. I actually have someone mow my lawn because I don’t own a lawn mower - it’s cheaper to have someone else do it than me buy one and keep it maintained, etc. My neighbors and I all use the same guy for a discount as our yards are sort of like one huge yard anyway.
Things are not always what they seem, is my point.
But I also totally get giving up some things to afford others. I gave up my coffee shop visit every morning and what used to be about once-a-week restaurant meals in favor of making my own coffee and one more weekly meal at home. I put the difference into…a vacation fund 
@OHMomof2 I am as frugal as they come and I get that you can purchase things at thrift stores and use Groupon, I was truly just trying to come up with the other ways in which persons CHOOSE to spend their discretionary income. Examples only, as was the DD coffee and the scratch tickets. I guess I’m a bit defensive because I am often asked how we manage vacations…and those are the people I know are paying full price for name labels, eating out, paying for household chores that they are capable of doing themselves, and yet can’t fathom why they can’t go on vacation.
Gotcha. We all make our choices