I am sympathetic to the “portion of family property” problem-- to a point. Yes, it stinks to be the kid. But assets can be sold, borrowed against. Families don’t want to dilute ownership of a plot of land with a home on it which is owned by three siblings, and don’t want to have their views encroached by selling off a chunk to a developer. Quite legitimate. But you are asking a college to consider you-- with land, which has value, or a closely held business, which has value, or real estate, which has both value and current cash flow attached to it- in the same bucket as someone with zero assets. And those folks are out there, and all of you are competing for the same chunk of dough.
OP- hugs. I hope you can have a good meeting to clear up any misunderstanding or miscalculation on the part of the college.