<p>I am moving on Tuesday and I hope my parents pretend to be happy at least until they leave. I know my mom is going to miss me, we have talked about it and I understand she is very sad and feels strange, I am really the first to go away. But if she actually cries in front of me I will feel SO bad and will worry about her after she leaves, it rips my heart right out of my chest to see my mother cry. So I hope she saves that for when she gets home. It is an awful, awful thing to watch your parents cry. It’s gotten easier as I’ve gotten older but it is still extremely heart wrenching and that’s just not what I want to be focusing on when I move, I want to have fun and not be overly concerned with the separation. So I hope, for my sake, my mom waits until she leaves the building to cry. I can understand she misses me without feeling like I am being kicked in the chest repeatedly.</p>
<p>An interesting point for this discussion, my mom doesn’t know I feel that way. My parents haven’t been very close in my lifetime, though it appears to be getting better, and my mom never really had anyone but me to come to. She tried not to burden me with her troubles, but as I got older sometimes things just came out in front of me. I never wanted to say anything to discourage her from opening up to me if she needed to. I still probably won’t tell her. Kids will do a lot of things to protect their parents when they can. So if she does cry at move in, I will just have to deal. I just really hope we all keep as happy of a tone as possible. I’ll be home in November for Thanksgiving, and may even come home for Halloween. We all know we miss each other and that it will be okay. That’s all that’s necessary. My mom does bring up occasionally how sad she’ll be without me, but generally tries to take a somewhat less than serious tone because I think she knows it makes me feel bad. Nobody wants to break their mother’s heart. And she also makes a point to highlight how happy she is for me that I am embarking on such a grand adventure, and tells me I am going to have the time of my life. That last bit is SO important. So I would just urge parents to consider how much negativity they are putting out, and make sure it is proportionate to the positive feelings you are putting out about the move, too. Your kids still need that from you. Especially college freshmen-- check out the College Life section of this forum. They are so insecure and unsure of themselves in this period of their life, many of them. I would be willing to bet many of your kids could really benefit from a more positive spin on move in day than you are giving them right now.</p>