Good question. I can think of several reasons: fear (first/only child leaving home), money, habit are the ones that come to my mind.
I didn’t tell D which school to attend but I did give, ah, heavily directed guidance last summer/fall in molding her school list. I would like to believe I have her best interests at heart when I did the legwork for her. We visited various types of colleges/universities so she could see which she liked but I admit I got to chose those schools. In hind sight, I missed a couple that could have reshaped her search.
In the end, she chose the schools to apply (from a list I had vetted for cost), wrote her essays, opened her own letters, and picked her final school.
Even if your parents can’t pay, include them in the discussion for the simple fact you are family. Too often, students and parents find themselves in some adversarial relationship: “me against them” over one issue or another. I think if you are open about your interests, hopes and fears, your parents will help however they can. It may not be money or solid advice but maybe just their viewpoint may help.
One thing I learned is the college landscape had changed tremendously since I was in college. It’s even changed from the time D’s eldest cousin attended college 15 years ago. Your parents may think you can “work your way through college.” There are a couple of options (Berea College comes to mind) but it’s really no longer possible. By including your parents, they will learn and see what you’re facing.
This cooperative approach helped make the application process less stressful for all of us.