When it comes to doing what it takes to reach top college goals, their are different ways to go about the goal. In the ChangeTheGame household, we like to live off of the “work hard/play hard” mantra because we only have one life to live. The goals based off of that tend to be a little old school (doing the best you can do, treating people right, sharing you time, your talents, and your treasures, and living your life to the fullest doing the things you love) so I am not certain how those tenants will end (daughter decided those reaches will be for graduate school, if at all). I don’t disagree that reaching for the top schools alone is just a false idol but hopefully there are other goals attached to that initial goal that make the journey a worthy one whether the child succeeds or fails in reaching that goal. So depending on one’s child, the advice in the original post could be the key, or may not be the key, but the hard work/focus on reaching a goal is something that “travels well” in my book.