@momof3boys said “I think today’s young men are probably more afraid of women accusing them of sexual assault more than women laughing at them sad to say.”
Ugh. Clearly, they’re not afraid enough or we wouldn’t all be here discussing this wretched case on a message board. What a depressing lack of humanity. You don’t have to be “radical feminist” to realize that something is very, very wrong here.
I really wonder what young men you are around. I have always been friends with boys and men and not one, as far as I know, has ever had a fear of being accused of sexual assault.
Then again, I don’t tend to hang out with rapists.
I was molested by my grandfather when I was a young teenager, sexually harassed by a male coworker while in college, and stalked by a mentally ill man after college. I don’t fear all men. But I do have a permanent feeling that there are men who might think my body is theirs to use and abuse. I don’t feel this way about any women.
Maybe young men are more afraid of being accused of rape than they are about being laughed at because it’s been drilled into their heads too many times that women have anterior motives and the males are the true victims.
@alh. Generally speaking, I don’t think a judge should be removed for making an unpopular decision. In this case, his unpopular decision followed the recommendation of the probation officer. Assuming the judge had no input into the probation report, that makes it harder to argue he should be removed.
That doesn’t mean I agree with the sentence. I think it’s absurd. If I were a resident of California, I would take a sudden interest in sentencing guidelines. If a judge really has the discretion to give so short a sentence to someone convicted of 3 felonies, I think that ought to change. I’d also be urging someone to run against Persky next time–which won’t be for six years.
rosered: I am so very sorry.
jonri: Thank you for answering my question. Your post is extremely helpful to me in thinking about all this. It does seem to me important to consider the correct way to respond to this unpopular sentence, and it has seemed to me both dstark and nottelling have good points. I really appreciate your point of view.
Congrats @dstark ! Nice to hear some good news in this thread for a change.
Agree dstark. You’ll be a fabulous grandpa I think.
I made us a grandparent thread.
It wasn’t clear to me if NYmomof2 might be making an announcement as well.
Thanks @alh, @LasMa, @jym626, @momofthreeboys, and everybody.
I am going to be an awesome happy feminist grandfather. 
I am jealous, @dstark . I want one too.
oops, posted on wrong thread.
I have both threads bookmarked too. 
I know that it’s important to look at both sides of every conversation, but it’s literally gotten to the point where I ignore the comments of certain posters just to avoid frustration.
I’m really glad that Emily Doe wrote her letter anonymously. It gives great insight for those who have never been assaulted and don’t know that trauma or pain. It also eliminates the very ignorant, yet very common notion that every women who accuses a “high profile” man of rape is in it for the money or attention.
@calicash:
It is almost ironic, where you have people who see any woman reporting a high profile person for rape claim it is about the money or attention, when the reality is that many women who are sexually assaulted don’t report it. Part of it is knowing the way they will be treated by some people, some of it if the experience of the person close to me holds is that there are also elements of feeling dirty and feeling like in some parts it is their fault (which given the way girls are brought up, even these days, doesn’t surprise me that they feel that). Those who think the woman has an agenda make it seem like it is all so easy to do, when the reality is for woman it is anything but trivial to report rape or sexual assault.
Didn’t read all 83 pages, so if someone posted this link already I apologize, but I think it is an amazing video on Consent. Many of you may have seen it already (it has been on cc before), I had my sons watch it and sent it to a lot of friends months ago, but worth repeating. Warning, couple F bombs in here, there is one made without that as well I believe.
This is very cleverly done, and the video in this story is surprisingly good at defining what defines sexual assault…
http://metro.co.uk/2015/10/28/this-new-sexual-consent-and-tea-video-from-the-police-is-brilliant-5466392/
This line of thinking is put forward on almost every college rape thread by certain members of CC, and it just boggles the mind that they really believe this. That a woman would be so upset by “regret sex,” as though it were the 1950s and they would be shunned and publicly censured by society for having sex while not married, that they would be willing to put themselves through the HELL that frequently accompanies an accusation of rape-the physical exam, the interviews by authorities who clearly don’t believe them, the ordeal of court testimony, the character assassination by defense attorneys, etc . I’ve read posts here on CC that insinuate that false accusations of rape occur with the same frequency, or nearly the same frequency, as actual rape, or that they actually constitute a bigger social problem than actual rapes. And then go on to state that women who are actually raped were somehow complicit because of what they wore, the party they attended, or the fact that they drank alcohol. It’s despicable. And it’s not just misogynistic men who take this POV; as the letter written by Brock Turner’s female friend illustrates, women are just as likely to victim blame as men are. I can well understand why so many who are raped would refuse to report it or refuse to cooperate once they see how they are being treated by authorities and other members of society.