For a variety of personal reasons, carpe diem has always been my motto.
No regrets so far on that lifestyle choice.
@ahl, I love your restoration project. The steps you went through to make it authentic - I so wish we could see the before and after.
As I get older I’ve been thinking a lot about the “rest of my life”. I can’t imagine retirement with H - he sounds much like other husbands who are happy with the status quo. Interesting discussion.
^^^^ This is welcome to be a part of this discussion but also I could imagine that it could hold it’s own in a separate thread as well! Meaning, I think this is a concern or reality for many (men or woman!)
@abasket I totally get the need for something new. I found that doing volunteer work for an organization (Board member) whose mission is one I strongly support has provided me with a way to channel my energy in retirement. Much of that work takes me out of my comfort zone because (as for most nonprofits) it involves fundraising. I’ve learned a great deal and while I still don’t love fundraising, I learned not to take things personally. I have found so many generous people with generous spirits—it’s a bright spot in my life.
We were very lucky (actually, part luck and part years of planning) on our big move. We sold directly to a developer as a tear down, so we didn’t have to do a thing to fix up the house. Which was good, because I used to say the house was tearing itself down. Then I negotiated a six month rent free post possession agreement, where all we had to pay were taxes, maintenance, and utilities and such, and allow access to the developer’s surveyors as necessary.
So we had six months to find our new home and prepare for our move. I started packing and cleaning out immediately and continued doing so for five months. Husband was literally still packing boxes as the movers were loading the truck, which is why his travel suitcase accidentally got packed on the truck.
We had been in the house for 25 years and knew it was our only and final move. I had a number of ideas about what I would start doing after the move. But my mom passed away literally days after we arrived, and I spent much of the next year working with my brother on all of the financial and legal stuff, mostly done long distance. And dealing with our very ill senior cat, who survived for six months after the move. So I did not really get going on any of my original ideas for a year.
It was a surreal year. But in the end, a great fresh start which I have never regretted for one second.
Wow @Marilyn, that sounds like a great arrangement! So glad it worked out like that for you.
My DH is one to spout Marie Kondo stuff (always ready to throw out what doesn’t bring him joy-- which leads to amusing jokes to toss people into that mix). I would love to get excited about cleaning stuff out. I will need to get the next round of boxes ready for the shredder company to chew them up. Yes, thats a project that is tiring but rewarding at the end, but its a short term one. Maybe I will get excited about getting rid of stuff. Will take a look at the bag-a-week thread.
By thinking is more akin to @Bromfield2 - something new is something small, not huge. Volunteering, maybe study a language, who knows. Those would be more comfortable labors of love.
Something new can definitely be something small and can be helpful and energizing. The topic of the thread, though, Fresh Start, leads me to think of something much bigger. And- to get to bigger sometimes requires work and usually a lot of change.
I am that person who found out that “time is not the problem” re: doing the declutter now that we are at home with nothing to do. Nope, the problem is me. Or really, us. I would get rid of some things and he would get rid of others…
Lately I have been trying to get some things organized with the idea that it would be nicer now to live in our house if it were less cluttered, and that it would be great to feel more flexible and ready to do something different if we wanted to, whether it be selling the house or going somewhere for a few months. I feel like I am not going to get a whole big fresh start right now, for various reasons, but I want to be in a better position to be ready for one.
I’m 60 but my husband is several years younger than me. Once we became true empty nesters, very recently, we moved to a town closer to his work and to the airport since he travels a lot for work. This all happened literally the week before CA went into lockdown because of the pandemic, so all my plans for meeting new people, getting involved in new things, possibly retiring and finding something interesting to do here in my new town, have all been put on the back burner. So I feel like we did take a major step toward making a fresh start, but then immediately got stalled! People ask me if I like living in my new town and I can’t really answer, I have barely experienced it!
My fresh start was when I bought a pied-à-terre (which I gut renovated) in NYC 5 years ago where both my children and grandchildren live. H and I want to visit them often but we are not ready to give up living in the Bay Area yet. Pre-covid, we used to go 3 or 4 times a year each time staying 4-8 weeks. This has enabled us to interact with our grandchildren for longer periods of time and at the same time enjoy and explore the unlimited activities NYC has to offer. We always purchase one way air tickets so as to not set a limit on our stay. I am basically a city person and despite having another vacation home elsewhere, I like the hustle and bustle of a big city for a change of pace.
Both H and I have friends and relatives in the NYC area and we have also entertained friends from the Bay Area who are eager to visit NY with us.
Yes, we are retired.
One person’s idea of a fresh start isn’t always the same as another’s. Moving is definitely a fresh start.