MODERATOR’S NOTE:
The other thing that is not helpful to him - talking about him behind his back. Despite a request on the thread, OP has not identified who “he” is; Therefore, I’m assuming it’s not the OP’s kid. “He” would probably be mortified that his parent is having this discussion, but would likely be less happy if a stranger is talking about him.
Regardless, I’m not sure what is left to say, so I’m closing the thread.