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<p>Yesterday, I resisted the temptation to give you the attention you so desperately seek. But today I am feeling a little more generous, so what the heck?</p>
<p>Let me personally thank your kid for “increasing the denominator and lowering Stanford’s acceptance rate” last year. Watch. Now you’re going to say that your kid wasn’t interested or that s/he turned down Stanford, etc. Whatever, ■■■■■.</p>