Sorry, I can understand your frustration! Won’t the no-roommate situation change, as housing shuffles around? Have they told her that she will likely get a roommate?
Agree with others that there are dorm guest rules that should work in your favor. And 45 min might be far enough away that BFF doesn’t want to do that much driving or pay for that much gas! I hope that your D is doing all the freshman activities and meeting new people…hopefully she will dive in to the college life and not have time for the BFF who isn’t a student there.