That’s really two questions: Where is your kid going to school? How are you paying for it? I’d assumed that we were talking about situations where the first question is already answered.
As to the first question - If folks ask, I tell 'em. It’s not something that one ordinarily volunteers. Although…
We homeschooled our sons through eighth grade, much to the consternation of various neighbors. One neighbor in particular would intimate that homeschooling was a form of child abuse. We were new to the neighborhood. It wasn’t the most welcoming comment we’d ever received. But eventually, I persuaded my wife not to do violence to the neighbor. Some years later, when the older son was admitted to Harvard, his acceptance package was accidentally delivered to her house. She came and delivered it personally to my wife, asking, why is your son getting mail from Harvard? My wife isn’t usually a petty person, but this time…
@CoMoMom - I tell those who question the cost that Harvard was the cheapest option for us - it would have cost more for our daughter to attend the nearby state flagship. That normally shuts them up.
The reactions to the Harvard name continue to make for awkward conversations, but it’s easier for the parent than it is for the kids. Search for “Harvard H-Bomb” you will find no lack of discussion on this topic. The good news is that when the kids are at college, it’s not an issue, and they can even wear Harvard sweatshirts without people giving them funny looks.
I’m not too guarded about saying my kid goes to Harvard. We’re not on the coast, but a lot of kids go to good schools in our community and I answer anyone who asks with an honest answer as opposed to saying Cambridge, Boston or New England. I even have a H sticker on the back window of my car as I will for wherever my son ends up. I’m certain all our kids are amazing, but there’s some amazing kids at a lot of schools so I’m no more or less proud or embarrassed by saying Harvard than I would be if I answered Mizzou, Denver or Loyola. Daughter wears school gear around without a hint of self consciousness. If anyone makes a fuss we say we like it, but it’s just another school and drop it at that. Personally, I think we’re all entitled to exhibit the exact same amount of school pride as anyone else. As for the price, you can say honestly that it’s not even in the top 50 of expensive schools in the US.
@CoMoMom I have heard a lot of “interesting” comments too. Usually… When people asked about our plan to pay, I said something like “we are working on it”. If they continued to press then I told them that they can write a check to help us ( everyone laughs ). It is a not a perfect response but it seems to stop people from asking more questions about money. How did you handle the situation ?
While 99% of our friends are very happy for us, a few people have made " interesting " comments
For example-
C: " Harvard is too big for a 17-year- old, my daughter will go to a community college for two years , then transfer to Harvard or Stanford "
K: " My son got into Xx state honors college …it is better than Harvard"
M: " Why does your daughter want to go so far away? MY daughter loves me so much and that is why she is going to a state school."
S: " R— is practically Ivy League"
I usually just smiled and listened because I know they are still deeply hurt because their kids have been rejected. Yet, it is hard to bite my tongue sometimes… I do not think Harvard works with amy community college on 2+2 transfer,
Graduation is right around the corner for the Class of 2015!!! As I am attempting to plan for DS’s 2016 graduation, I was wondering does Harvard allow the graduating class to stay in the dorms until graduation or do they move out at the end of finals only to return again a week later?
I understand where people are coming from and it doesn’t bother me at all when people have reactions to the Harvard name. Shoot, I’ve had my own reactions to it. It does seem to bother my daughter, who isn’t hearing the subtext. So when Adult A asks where she’s going to college and she answers Harvard, she’s taken aback when the person’s next question is, oh did your parents go there? She assumes the message is that there must be a connection because she certainly wouldn’t get in on her own merit. When Adult B asks her what she wants to study and she answers Computer Science along with a humanities concentration, she’s offended by the answer, hmm, Harvard isn’t really known for that are they? Adult C asks flat out, are you rich or something? She doesn’t know how to respond to that at all. I’ve counseled her to let it all go and to understand the basis for these reactions.
Related issues. We all know that the Alumni Network is a wonderful bonus. Yet I run into people (like my sister!) who seem to think that making connections is the only reason to attend a school like Harvard. I began the fall semester telling people how proud I was that DD was enjoying her Latin and philosophy classes. And they are aghast that she’s squandering Harvard’s resources like that.
@student4ever Seniors are allowed to stay in their rooms throughout the days from exams to graduatuon. They need to be totally moved out the day after commencement. Thus some packing is required between party events.
Hello friends, SOS. Visitas is in two days. Do you happen to know which restaurant in Harvard square area is most food-allergy friendly? We have severe peanut /Treenut allergy and a few more. We just need a salad and grilled chicken. Online source stated that Blue Ginger ( Wellesley) is good but it is too far away. Any suggestions? Thank you.
Do you want sit-down restaurants, or counter service? For counter service, Flour Bakery (on Mass Ave a little south of Central Square) has great sandwiches and salads, and the nut and gluten status of the foods is clearly marked on the menu.
In the square, I adore both Alden & Harlow and Harvest. I don’t have any allergies, so I’ve never had to ask, but both are restaurants where a) ingredient lists are known and carefully prepared, so no unknowns would pop up, and b) servers are helpful and knowledgable.
I can’t believe that my son is graduating next week. How did that happen? I am seeking advice from those who have been there before. My pressing question is when/where is the best opportunity for photos in the gowns. I am worried about missing the opportunity. On a more complicated note, my younger son is also graduating from high school and I would ideally like to get a picture of the two together as well. Any suggestions on timing are welcome.
Other graduation “secrets” are very much appreciated.
lhenkin, you will have lots of opportunity for photos. My son’s undergrad graduation was so fun! We are also heading out to Cambridge next week for our son’s graduation from Harvard law school. I am so full of emotion right now. It will be sad to say goodbye to Harvard after so many years. It’s been such an amazing place for our son. He received a wonderful education, met some lifelong friends and met his wife all at Harvard. Best of luck to graduates and parents SOAK UP ALL THE FUN AND MEMORIES. DON’T MISS OUT ON ANY ACTIVITY. (even in the rain).
Hopefully, everyone enjoyed the graduation and all the events that went along with them, I know I did!. I still can’t believe my son is done with 7 years at Harvard. The weather cooperated and we didn’t get rained on during graduation. We enjoyed Mike’s Pastry WITHOUT having to go into Boston, YAY!!! I was a bit disappointed that Finale’s is gone, what happened? it was always crowded and so delicious.
any stories anyone wants to share about their experience with graduation?
Dear friends,
What do you know about the single rooms for freshmen? We were hoping for a suite that can accommodate but it is likely that my D may have a single room. I am now worried about the social aspect. Anything will be beneficial, Thank you!
Yes!Yes!Yes! Graduation was so much fun. I have never been to a more festive graduation. It was fun to celebrate with my son’s blocking group and friends. It was sad for me to say goodbye to his home for these four years. Somehow it didn’t seem sad for him or his gang. I think they are ready for the next adventure…which is the best result of a wonderful four years, right?
lhenkin, so glad graduation was fun. It was for us as well. I agree that these years went by way too fast. I guess we’ve done our job if our kids feel they are ready for the next chapter of life. Congratulations!!!
