<p>“In terms of depth, breadth, and quality of the academic departments, quality of faculty, Stanford and Berkeley are hands down better than Yale”</p>
<p>Datalook, I think you are a genius. Let’s take a closer look at why Berkeley is unequivocally better than Yale.</p>
<h1>1 - If you look at the graduate school rankings… oh wait. Did I just say grad school? This is a problem. Luckily, mathematics will come to the rescue. Let’s start with a simple equation. If e=mc^2, then undergraduate = graduate. Well, thanks to Einstein, we know that the former portion of the statement is true, so it follows that graduate = undergraduate, and we can therefore substitute the terms. But since this line of proof is getting a little complex, let’s begin with an easier comparison.</h1>
<p>Let’s take a quick look at admission rates. I am going to ignore all decimal points, since they make things a little more confusing, so Yale has an admission rate of approx. 75%. Common, how could any school that admits 3/4 of its applicants be any good???
Next, let’s take a look at cross-admit battles. Has anyone seen any threads on CC about Berkeley Yale cross admits, because I sure haven’t. Why is that, I wonder? Because Yale is embarrassed by the results. So they try to compare themselves to other schools, like Princeton and Stanford. Well, sure, Yale actually consistently wins or ties those cross-admit battles, but that is clearly just an indicator of the effects of rampant drug abuse on today’s teenagers.
I could go on and on, but I pity the reader, and as a result I will offer my final piece of evidence: God told me so. That’s right, you heard it! GOD. Straight from His mouth. Well, to be honest, I used an intermediary, but I do hear that the Oracle at Delphi is fairly reliable. So there you have it - from God’s mouth to your ears (and a bunch of people in between, but we’ll ignore that for now): Berkeley >>>>> Yale. In fact, Berkeley is actually the #2 school in the world, after the University of Montana (every single cow admitted to the University of Montana has subsequently enrolled during the past century. That’s a consistent 100% yield rate. Damn! Let’s see Yale beat that! Wait, did I say cows??)
I am, as always, very truly yours,
Eli140</p>