<p>My mother has to have sauerkraut to mix with her mashed potatoes. This is not something that caught on with any of the rest of us,</p>
<p>And turnips? Yech.</p>
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<p>Well there is the disconnect. My wife’s family and mine all have their favorite dishes. There have to be three versions of white potatoes. There needs to be oven roasted kielbasa. There must be caramelized butternut squash. There are two rival stuffings. And there is a running debate on the correct spice level in the pumpkin pies. At makes for a lot of fun debate and needling. And a some point someone eulogizes grandma Wanda and her gibbet gravy. </p>
<p>I dont understand these low wattage ‘holidays’ where people choke down twice as much bland, dry food looking for the elusive flavor in a normal portion the proper version of the dish. The purpose of Feast Days is celebration after all.</p>
<p>Yes, I think the disconnect is the degree of sentimentality people exhibit over holiday-related details such as food. Some people exhibit a lot, and some others (unsurprisingly, including Pizzagirl) exhibit less. The takeaway should be to know your audience.</p>
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I do that. When I make mashed potatoes, I provide myself with a little buffet of sauerkraut, roasted garlic, caramelized onions and corn so that I can have an entire plate of different mix ins. No. I’m not kidding. Pig!</p>
<p>Thank you dmd!</p>
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Actually, that sounds really good, except for the sauerkraut.</p>
<p>Re dmd’s recipe: if you are up for it, I would suggest using creme fraiche, perhaps with heavy cream to thin as necessary, instead of the sour cream. Creme fraiche can be simmered without breaking. It is also easy to make, using a little buttermilk and heavy cream, if you can’t easily buy it or don’t want to pay an arm and a leg.</p>
<p>Zoosermom, your plate of mix-ins sounds intriguing. I know you would never consider eating at KFC, but they have these “bowls” that are a similar concept. Albeit made with execrable mashed potatoes. :)</p>
<p>Those mashed potato mix-ins sound good. I’m on my way, zmom!</p>
<p>Consolation - we never did any kind of thing with marshmallows either, and we’ve served green beans with slivered almonds, but not any kind of actual casserole.</p>
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<p>I don’t think you’re hearing us. We don’t think that foods that aren’t swimming in fat / sugar / salt / 25 different ingredients are necessarily bland, dry or inedible. Think of it as the little black dress philosophy – simple and elegant, not overaccessorized :-).</p>
<p>zoosermom:</p>
<p>was it your H that needs some sort of antipasto and pasta at Thanksgiving? I have an idea that will give him what he needs but keeping it light…I use wooden skewers often for certain appetizers. I have made an antipasto on a skewer using tortellini and veggies. Maybe that will be something for him?</p>
<p>cooked tortellini, small mozzarella balls, cubed cucumber, olives, cherry tomatoes, cut up peppers…marinate in olive oil and herbs overnight, thread them on skewers and voila, you’re done! 
I suppose you can add meat to it too, like salami or ham, but I keep ours veggie only.</p>
<p>Consolation—it hadn’t occurred to me to use creme fraiche, but I’m sure it would work. You’re also making me wonder if a little buttermilk powder would stabilize the cream/sour cream mixture.</p>
<p>Argbargy wrote:
“And a some point someone eulogizes grandma Wanda and her gibbet gravy”</p>
<p>I’m sorry, I can’t stand it, the image of gibbet gravy cracked me up. I think you mean giblet gravy. And the missing ingredient that none of your relatives has figured out is probably some coffee. Really.</p>
<p>Yep. I bet it’s coffee.</p>
<p>I think a lot of your families would be disappointed with the meal my in laws serve.
I have never seen any casserole, marshmallow or jello served. Heck they don’t even serve rolls or mashed potatoes. Gravy consists of the pan drippings. Whoever heard of Thanksgiving meal without potatoes.
Green beans are frozen green beans from Trader Joes that are blanched and at the last minute saut</p>
<p>I don’t think people are disappointed because the meal is less (or more) fancy per se–the disappointment comes solely because it is different from what one is sentimental about. Thus (for example), I am perfectly happy with cranberry sauce that still retains the shape of the can, or homemade sauce. What I am not really happy with is mango-cranberry emulsified sauce with star anise, even if it tastes pretty good. I’d be happy to eat it some other day, but on Thanksgiving I’d rather have cranberry sauce. But I keep it to myself during the meal.</p>
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This is fantastic! He would love it. Plus also portion control, which is a huge issue for him.</p>
<p>My first NY boss was an Italian-American woman. I grew up in a very WASPy household. I was astounded that lasagna could be considered an essential part of Thanksgiving dinner. But now I think it’s kind of cool for immigrants to integrate the traditional (which probably bears little resemblance to what the Pilgrims actually ate) with their own traditions. Thanksgiving dinner is pretty much a 19th c invention. [What</a> Was on the Menu at the First Thanksgiving? | History & Archaeology | Smithsonian Magazine](<a href=“What Was on the Menu at the First Thanksgiving? | History| Smithsonian Magazine”>What Was on the Menu at the First Thanksgiving? | History| Smithsonian Magazine) Apparently we should add fish, particularly shellfish and eel if we want to be authentic!</p>
<p>BTW, I did not grow up on green bean casserole or marshmallow sweet potatoes. We did have cranberry jelly from the can though until my Mom belatedly caught on that the simple sauce on the bag is super easy and much tastier. My mother made a great stuffing, decent turkey, mashed potatoes, and some sort of green vegetable (it may have been the same or different every year, I had no memory of anything in particular.) We had lots of somewhat weird holidays based on what was available where we were living (Thailand, Japan, East Africa)</p>
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We have that, too. Not because anyone eats it except my mom, but because when he was growing up my brother gave a cranberry jelly speech every year, and it wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without reminiscing about the speech.</p>
<p>We have can shaped cranberry sauce, too! It has become an in joke.</p>
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<p>Ha! </p>
<p>And its my wife’s grandmother, although at this point I have heard about the apartment they lived and the family walking over to her place early in the morning for years. She lives on.</p>
<p>"Does anyone else have a family member whose tradition involves pasta and antipasto at Thanksgiving? My husband feels lost without those things. "</p>
<p>Not for Thanksgiving but Christmas. MY mother was Italian from NYC and I didn’t realize people ate roasts or turkey at Christmas for years. I thought you had pasta, antipasto, salad with olive oil and red wine vinegar, two kinds of sausages, etc. The sauce alone took all day to make.</p>
<p>I love my in-laws and in-laws of the in-laws who come celebrate with us on Christmas. But I finally decided to have a “traditional” Christmas dinner for just my H, kids and I on Christmas Eve so that the ham and whatever else wasn’t as disappointing. I feel much better about Christmas food now, even though I basically make two special dinners two days in a row.</p>
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<p>Ha - me too! I was in college before I learned that cranberry sauce didn’t retain the shape of the can! But I don’t feel any worse the wear for it.</p>