When my husband and I got married (second marriage for both, and we’d combined 2 households), one couple of friends got us a sunset sail, or something like that. We had a very small wedding (less than 10 people), but we thought that was a great, thoughtful gift. Even in day to day life with our kids, they certainly have everything they need, but we value experiences with them more than “stuff.” Maybe we are getting over the age of conspicuous consumption, or whatever it should be called. Good for these young couples who don’t want so much stuff.
@Bromfield2 My friends and I have talked about those sites and most of them do just send a check (also taking a percentage) I would just write a check. They may have changed policies though! I would call and ask.
D1 and her SO take 2 weeks vacation every year. They have traveled overseas extensively on vacation and paid for their own share. They have not combined their assets and I am not sure if they will after they get married. I am sure their honeymoon will be exotic, but I am not sure who will be paying for it. By the time they get married they would have been working for 7+ years. Something to be said to wait until one is financially established before getting married.
S and FDIL are going to Jamaica for their honeymoon. He used this year’s tax return to fund it.
They filled out a gift registry because most of their kitchen things/linens are hand-me-downs or leftovers from the college and early employment years. I had to explain that this would be their big chance to get new items and many older people (their parents’ ages) like to give gifts over just writing a check.
@oldfort, my D2 and her fiancé also have been working and supporting themselves for 7 years since graduating college. They will be going on the honeymoon to Hawaii that is booked whether people contribute to the honey fund or not. Gift contributions toward their honeymoon would help them, I’m sure, as they are not swimming in the dough since they are performing artists. D1 has been working for 3 years and supporting herself since she went to graduate school for four years. Her new spouse is a graduate student. They are funding their own honeymoon too. They both are very well travelled.
Good thoughts above. I should have added, it was not only the book that changed many young adults’ lives, but it was our recent downsizing which involved a lot of purging, that made me realize just how much needless stuff we had, that we had NEVER, EVER used! I hate to see young adults these days start collecting stuff they will never use, but get because many people in our generation think the only proper way to celebrate a newly married couple is ‘stuff’. Now granted, new linens, upgraded small kitchen appliances are nice, and if newlyweds want them, more power to them. But many newlyweds who live in large suburban areas have much smaller spaces due to high costs of rent/owning and just don’t have room for things. I’m all for minimizing ‘stuff’ after going through our recent purging process.
My son is doing things backwards. He qualified for some world triathlon competition in Cozumel and then he got engaged. So guess where the honeymoon is? Meanwhile, I will be be worried about this Zika virus for the next several months, even though she isn’t currently pregnant.
Actually, D2 and fiancé had originally thought of going to Costa Rica for their honeymoon and decided against it due to Zika and picked Hawaii instead.
DS#1 and wife included a honey fund in their registry and also included the option to make donations to their favorite charities. That was very important to them. To answer @Bromfield2 , MOB and I together gifted them one of their items on their honey fund to the bride for her shower gift. They told us that they get a message from the honey fund that the item / activity was “purchased”, but yes, in reality the $ all went into one pot. In fact I am not sure they even did the thing we “bought” them.
I have no idea if DH and his wife combined their finances or still have separate accounts. They had already had their pay checks set up in direct deposit into their own accounts. I would guess they still do, but it’s really none of my business and I’ve never asked.
DS and w took a nice honeymoon. They too had been out in the workforce for several years and were financially independent. Like someone mentioned above, they used airline miles to book the flights (they watched the deals for months and snared the flights many months before the honeymoon). We paid for the first few days of their honeymoon (gift to them, and we got the hotel suite for them with points) and they covered the rest. DS is a pro at finding deals on the web, so I imagine they kept the cost comparatively reasonable
Son and his fiancee like to hike and they are going to one of the National Parks on the other side of the U.S. from us. They have camped in the past, but for this trip they will be staying in hotels for the travel nights and a lovely Airbnb, with great views, for the main time.
This is one aspect of the wedding prep that my son really enjoyed arranging – had the plans lined up early, reservations for flights, accommodations, etc. locked in. He is handling the cost – fiancee just finished professional school and he is four years out of college/working. (They plan to fully merge their finances.)
Two close relatives got married last year. One had a HineyFund, but didn’t even have a honeymoon planned (for a good reason…but it was taking place a year after the wedding to an undetermined destination).
We sent them money. That way…they could use it for the real honeymoon or for something else. Their choice.
In addition, they did stay at a family cottage for several days. We did a champagne, cheese and champagne glasses gift basket for them whic was at the cottage when they arrived. And they had one of our cars…and we had the wedding dress cleaned for the bride.
Lots of different options.
I have absolutely no objection to contributing to a honeymoon fund if there is a destination and a honeymoon planned.
Best typo of the day!!
I agree about the typo!!!
I confess that I am paying for the honeymoon. Son and DIL are such a sweet couple and have no money. They were married about 10 days ago and are leaving in a week for a national park vacation. I set a moderate budget, booked the flights, etc. I’m not recommending that anyone else do this (I’ve been married twice and went on two honeymoons without a cent of parental money) but I can do it financially and got off relatively easy being on the groom’s side of the wedding.