Hospice care

Parent Cafe
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<p>Yes, jym, I do have a mother in a nursing home in Texas. She is there because of a disability, not an illness. She will outlive us all.</p>

<p>My grandmother did, in fact, live with us when she was bedridden, and I actually sat and held her hand as she died. She was not in hospice, not in pain, she just went unconscious and eventually stopped breathing. She did not want to be resuscitated, and my uncle, her son, just said to let her go. This was back in the mid eighties, and it was quite the norm, and still is where I’m from, for grandma to just die in her children’s home.</p>

<p>My FIL did have a period this past weekend where he was just like my grandma, where he was sleeping with his eyes half open, breathing through his mouth. My son sat next to him and held his hand. But eventually, he did wake up and even wanted a meal. He is in no pain at all, as he has a morphine patch and takes slow release morphine twice a day. My BIL insists that we give him quick acting pills that can be given every hour at least every four hours, at the hospice nurse’s instructions. Even if he’s asleep, he wants me to wake him up after four hours to give him the fast acting dose. Personally, I’d like to just let him sleep, but I’ve been given instructions, and God help me if he takes a turn for the worse due to my failure to follow instructions.</p>

<p>I’ve insisted that my husband relieve me Friday night, as, based on a lot of responses here, I’m figuring this will probably go on for several weeks. Thank you so much for the heads up.</p>

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<p>^^^^It’s not necessarily the case that it WILL, just that it COULD.</p>

<p>Best wishes to your family at this time-I know this is hard.</p>

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<p>The hospice nurses/doctor might be able to give you some sense from their experience, but at least with my dad, he went downhill and we thought it was just about over, but a few days in hospice and he perked up and looked better than he had in months – and then suddenly died ten days later. </p>

<p>Our hospice had a great booklet on the process of the body shutting down, and I really wish I’d had it before my mother and grandmother had died – it explained so much.</p>

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<p>My dad was on hospice for about 6 months before he passed, my FIL less than a month. </p>

<p>That being said my Mom is a hospice patient and has been for a year. She lives in my home and receives in home care several times a week. Her situation is probably a little unique because she has ALS but it is unusually slow in progression, although I am starting to see a steady decline.</p>

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<p>Just sending a virtual hug. Hospice is a blessing, we got the same booklet others have mentioned and it helped.</p>