How do I convince him to let me visit colleges?

[Newzbugg]

<p>I believe that it is a good idea to visit the Cal college even if you doubt that you will attend there. Even if you already know that you will not be attending there, you will have at least learned more about what the college is like. Now is the time to explore and find out as much as you can about your options. If the money thing makes Olin more attractive to your father, then so be it. At least you know what it is that you are turning down.</p>

[bigp9998]

<p>Here’s an idea: pay for the visit yourself. You are 18 years old and there is no reason why you can’t afford a couple hundred dollars if it will determine the next four years of your life. And if you’re dad doesn’t want to go with you, go by yourself or with a friend. Come on, don’t count on your parents for everything. Have a little independence…</p>

[backhandgrip]

<p>You can’t do better ( free tuition!!!) than Olin for undergraduate. Olin will carry great clout at Caltech for graducate school. Go to Caltech for grad school.</p>

[mathwiz]

<p>

Here’s an idea: pay for the visit yourself. You are 18 years old and there is no reason why you can’t afford a couple hundred dollars if it will determine the next four years of your life. And if you’re dad doesn’t want to go with you, go by yourself or with a friend. Come on, don’t count on your parents for everything. Have a little independence…

</p>

<p>I suggested that, but since I’m not an adult I can’t do s***.</p>

<p>

Let me get this straight. You got into 2 of the top 6 engineering schools in the US–and you are complaining because your father wants you to go to the one that costs $130,000 less.

As I’ve said, my dad actually has a college fund set up for me, so money is NOT the issue. So if he didn’t spend the 130K on college, he’d have to pay a hefty portion of it to the IRS.
And I never said he wants me to go to either one, he just won’t let me visit, at all.</p>

<p>

It’s makes no sense to pay that much extra when the schools are so close in rank to each other–and when the college experience you are likely to get will be so similar (both small schools in fairly urban areas).

For some people ranking is not the only criteria on which to choose a college. Olin and Caltech are very different places.</p>

<p>

Here’s the deal I would make with you:
You can go to either school–but if you go to Caltech, then when you graduate, you need to pay me back the $130,000–with interest. This is so you would understand what it takes to save up that much money. (Then I’d consider whether to use it for your grad school, to help you buy a house, or for my retirement–which one depending upon your success in college and on-the-job).

Then I’d ask him if he paid his own way through college. Some people don’t realize that 17 year olds DONT HAVE 130 FREAKING THOUSANDS DOLLARS! And I don’t think I’d owe him the money, since he himself got his college money from his father and I’m planning to send my kids to college on my own if they want to go.</p>

<p>

Be thankful for your acceptance to Olin–and for your father’s good judgement in telling you to go there instead of to Caltech.

Again, they’re totally different places. Do you even know what you’re talking about?</p>

<p>Calcruzer, I’m not a rude or mean person, but your comments just aren’t helping me. I find them inconsiderate.</p>

<p>bookworm, sending you a PM now… thanks.</p>

[premature_gray]

<p>I think Calcruzer does not understand that your dilemma is you are not permitted to VISIT the schools.</p>

[paying3tuitions]

<p>Yes, Calcruzer, it seems that, unlike yourself who is to be commended for making tremendous financial sacrifice, this young man’s dad has ample resources for either college, but denies him the chance to visit and insists on the closer school. There are other factors, as well, including the Dad’s demonstrated temper rages lambasting his S, and the immeasureable issue that the Dad is a first-generation immigrant from Iran.
While I can hear your dad-ly frustration at what sounds like someone spoiled, I think here it’s more of a battle of control for emotional, perhaps cultural, but not financial reasons.
WHen the Dad denied S the visit earlier this month, it’s mades the S unable to decide well between 2 good choices.
My best advice to this young man in such a difficult vise was to make the decision sight-unseen, if necessary, if his research tells him Caltech is better–and (especially at this late date) – nuts to the visit.</p>

<p>MATHWIZ, I hope your research helps shed some light. Everyone is rooting for you to be able to choose, since both places have good to offer and you say your dad can afford either one.</p>

<p>Can Caltech extend the May 1 decision deadline for you? Contacting them might
buy you some time on that deadline.</p>

[mathwiz]

<p>Just posted on my other thread too, but anyways, me = Olin '11. My dad once again knows me better than I do. ;)</p>

[atomicfusion]

<p>So you can’t visit Caltech. I don’t see what the big deal is. College visits are overrated anyway and if you visit your views of the school will only be affected by how it LOOKS. Those stories about seeing the campus and “feeling at home” are pretty much bs. Even if you sit in on a class… that’s just one class… classes and professors vary A LOT. You can basically find all the information about the schools that you need about the two schools on here.</p>

<p>edit: but it looks like you’ve already made your mind so this post is futile.</p>