<p>I feel for you OP. My mom doesn’t work and I’m constantly reminded at school how “rich” I am… I wrote my common app essay about how I moved from Los Angeles to Wisconsin and tried to play hockey. In the end I failed and quit, but the point of the essay was to emphasize that you can work as hard as you want but you won’t succeed unless you plan things out and start ahead of your competition. </p>
<p>One of my kids wrote about a well known literary character she had been trying to emulate since middle school – sometimes successfully, sometimes not, sometimes with funny results, and sometimes she decided it wasn’t such a good idea after all. Another wrote about her experiences studying an unusual foreign language for many years just because she got interested when she was young, and eventually spending a summer in that country during high school. Another was about an academic EC that she did and why she found it so engaging, and how it had changed her perspective on the world.</p>
<p>I wouldn’t worry about this much. Take a look at the prompts, and ideas will likely come to you over time. But what seems like a good idea now at 15 might not seem like what you want to say at 17. I don’t think either of my kids COULD have written the essays they did (which were very successful for them) at the age of 15 – part of what made the essays good was that they showed growth in their perspectives over time. </p>
<p>Focus in on things YOU are interested in. Maybe read this book: “How to be a High School Superstart” by Cal Newport. It could lead you to some EC choices that make the essays quite obvious when the time comes. Focus on living an interesting life that is true to your interests for now.</p>
<p>A few more good resources:</p>
<p>Scroll down to the Essay section of this book:</p>
<p><a href=“A Is for Admission: The Insider's Guide to Getting into the Ivy League and ... - Michele A. Hernández - Google Books”>http://books.google.com/books?id=5DH7a7ECTRQC&pg=PT100&lpg=PT100&dq=Michele+A.+Hernández.+Finally,+the+last+major+section&source=bl&ots=-MmeJduEtu&sig=vrvS8NGKsD6KMxsgCXXDx2dN8AI&hl=en&sa=X&ei=2qX0U-KuIJG2yASluIGQBw&ved=0CBQQ6AEwAA#v=onepage&q=Michele%20A.%20Hernández.%20Finally%2C%20the%20last%20major%20section&f=false</a></p>
<p>AND Buy</p>
<p>On Writing the College Application Essay by Harry Bauld—formerly an admissions officer at Brown University and assistant director of admissions at Columbia University</p>
<p><a href=“http://www.amazon.com/Writing-College-Application-Essay-Acceptance/dp/0064637220”>http://www.amazon.com/Writing-College-Application-Essay-Acceptance/dp/0064637220</a></p>
<p>@GMTplus7 Have you got a chip on your shoulder.</p>
<p>@butterfreesnd Thanks for the advice. I guess writing about things like that shouldn’t be disadvantageous.</p>
<p>@bengalmombengal @dustypig I really don’t want to give homeschooling a bad name, as I think it’s very beneficial even if it may have it’s downfalls of sociallization. etc. But, apparently, that would be a very unique thing to talk about. I could talk about the experience of being homeschooled and being able to go the store at 11.am on a school day. Or eating a Kit-Kat for the first time at age 13. Or the pitfalls and advantages of not being exposed to negative cultural values.</p>
<p>I guess I shouldn’t worry about it too much. But it will probably be hard to write about these things without sounding ill-prepared for college life (I was sheltered a little, but since I’ve taken a few classes at the university, I’m getting better at knowing the ways and thoughts of people who didn’t grow up like me) . I’ll try though.</p>
<p>OP, you still have time to try community service activities; help at a hospital or fire department , local veterans, nursing home or shut ins, homeless shelter, etc.,</p>
<p>
No. Actually, reading between the lines of your original post, i sense that your ostensible request for essay advice is really an excuse to boast about your affluence and privilege. All the details u provide about your family life are gratuitous:
</p>
<p>@Princess563 Homeschooling is rare on the micro level but at the national level there are enough people being homeschooled that it isn’t all that uncommon. </p>
<p>" But, apparently, that would be a very unique thing to talk about. I could talk about the experience of being homeschooled and being able to go the store at 11.am on a school day. Or eating a Kit-Kat for the first time at age 13. Or the pitfalls and advantages of not being exposed to negative cultural values."</p>
<p>More importantly no highly selective college wants to hear about how you ate your first kit-kat. The highly selective universities are looking for people who are making a difference in their community or benefiting society at large. Those topics come off way too into yourself. </p>
<p>I grew up upper-middle-class, both parents with graduate degrees, 3rd-gen college student, etc. I wrote about (for UC prompt 1) my passion (languages) and how it was at odds with the STEM-focused community I grew up in; (for UC 2) an unusual job I had had and what I learned from it and from the interesting person I worked with; and for the (old version) Common App, a language immersion camp I had attended. If I had to do it over again, I’d keep the UC essays and change the Common App one to an essay about my favorite teacher and how she changed the way I approach life (which I know may sound cheesy, but my English teachers responded really enthusiastically to drafts of that essay; I changed topics because I had a hard time staying under the word limit). </p>
<p>Also, one of the best application essays I’ve ever read was about the applicant’s unruly hair. So, no you do not need to have lived a tragic life in order to write an interesting essay.</p>
<p>Write about whatever brings a smile to your face. Another poster recommended you volunteer, and I would not recommend writing about volunteering unless it is your passion. Write about what makes your tick, what makes you happy, and what excites you. Don’t write something because that is what you think the college wants, they will see through it. Hey eating your first kit kat bar at thirteen can be turned into an essay. My favorite essay I ever read was about a boy whose mom cut his hair.</p>
<p>@bomerr Yes, I know that they want to see how I will contribute to the student body and all that. But I was just going to tie that into my personal experiences.</p>
<p>I just read an essay where a girl talked about how she developed a love for bacon, and then she created a metaphor comparing her love bacon to her love for knowledge. Another guy talked about how his grandmother died from cancer and how that drove his motivation to become a doctor. I thought it was a decent format.</p>
<p>Do you think it’s a bad idea? Maybe writing about homeschooling experiences is probably a bad idea, but do you object to this format in general?</p>
<p>@GMTplus7 </p>
<p>I knew it was going to sound that way to somebody, but I was just trying to give a description of what kind of a situation I’m in, so people can state reasonable, applicable advice to what I thought was a problem.
Please don’t make assumptions about me. I’m sorry.</p>
<p>Besides, last I heard, when applying to college, you have to present your parents level of education and what they do for a living, and of course schools are aware of your income bracket.
Not being first-generation and all that buzz could possibly be used against me in an effort for socio-economic diversity*, so I can NOT be fooling around with this essay. I just thought people should have this knowledge of my background to take into consideration, and of course, when advising about the essay in general.</p>
<p>(Please, please correct me if I’m wrong about what’s required when applying to colleges).
*Hopefully being an URM will offset this, by the way, but who knows?</p>
<p>
Well, no, not so much, but it is pretty clear you are feeling like you haven’t had adversity. That may be the case, so for goodness sake don’t write about something as if you had. You need to write about something you are passionate about.</p>
<p>Since many colleges usually give some sort of choices, my kids religiously avoided the adversity ones. They also both avoided writing about volunteer trips to impoverished lands. That’s done a lot and it has to be GOOD to be successful.
Eventually, a time came when they got one they couldn’t avoid. Fortunately, I think it was softened a little (write about a challenge you had, or something you overcame…). A successful applicant I know talked about her fear of public speaking and what she did to challenge herself on that. The boy talked about his (very real) challenge to medal at the state sports competition.</p>
<p>Finally, I would say that it appears you still have some time. You have an opportunity to try something in which you put yourself out there more than you might normally be comfortable with. It might sound “risky” to you or your parents but it can also yield rewards. You never really know what you are capable of until you push yourself.</p>
<p>Whatever you write should be relevant to the college review process. Pick some experience from the last few years or so and, just through a nice tale, try to show the personal qualities and strengths the colleges like to find in applicants. In the essay, that’s not champion this or hero that. It’s more about you, the kid you’ll be on campus, your perspective, etc. try to include some “show, not tell,” so they can engage in your essay, feel it, not just have to take you on your say-so. And you don’t need to take the prompts literally, they’re just a starting point. Just keep in mind the attributes they’re looking for.</p>
<p>I think colleges expect essays to show what home schooled students did with their time and how they took advantage of the opportunities home schooling provides. Writing stereotypical, “I never go out and I didn’t taste chocolate until I was a teen” is a waste and very far from the reality of all the home schooling families I know.</p>
<p>@Princess563 </p>
<p>" to her love for knowledge." </p>
<p>Knowledge is another thing colleges are looking for in students, since it is a school after all.
Emotional stories about serious personal growth are another one. </p>
<p>Kit-Kats and being home schooled not so much. </p>
<p>OP, google “college essay brainstorming.” There are tons of worksheets that will help you think of interesting things about yourself.</p>
<p>I can easily imagine an excellent essay on the subject of how you ate your first Kit-Kat. It’s all in how you tell the story, not whether or not the story is interesting intrinsically. </p>
<p>There have been a lot of great comments, so I apologize if I repeat/rehash what some people have said, but I will say a few things:</p>
<p>1) As others have said, the essay is a way for the admissions folks to find out about <em>you</em>. You don’t need a sob story – although sob stories are gripping. You just need something that shows more about you. As others have discussed, one great thing you can do is just talk about the things that you have <em>accomplished</em>. Since you’re not undergoing x sob story or y catastrophe, what sort of great things do you have the time/resources/support to do? </p>
<p>2) It’s cliche to say, but everyone is unique. You don’t have to be a 100% special snowflake to still have things in your life that are not quite the norm of everyone else. I think a lot of people (especially when they are younger) are not self-aware enough to recognize this, and so they mistake their own life as being too boring/uninteresting…when it isn’t.</p>
<p>However…</p>
<p>3) You are actually pretty self-aware. (First of all, I will say that anyone who recognizes their own privilege instead of looking at it as an accusation is ahead of the game. And I want to say this as a compliment. Self-awareness is such a great trait to have and to cultivate.) You recognize that a) you are privileged but that b) you have some things in your life that are not common. It’s just that you don’t seem to think that your unique circumstances are as ‘compelling’ as others (as you wrote in another comment, talking about being deprived of ice cream doesn’t seem like a good essay to put up against someone whose teeth are rotting out…)</p>
<p>However, I would suppose that there is more than meets the eye here. There may be something that you are not fully aware of, or that you are improperly discounting.</p>
<p>I can say that because in reading your background, I see a little bit of myself in you. Not totally, since my circumstances are different in enough ways, but just enough to make me wonder if there’s something that could apply. For example, you write:</p>
<p>"My parents are married. My father is an Aerospace Engineer with a Ph.D and my mother a Chemical Engineer with an M.S, (Although she doesn’t work outside the home anymore). I think we’re upper-middle class. I will be going to college as a third-generation. I am an URM, but I’ve never felt discriminated against.
I’ve never been hungry, or out of doors, or without clothes. I’ve never been raped. I’ve never even heard of anyone here using drugs. No one here is getting pregnant in high school. (I’m flabbergasted at others who insinuate that this type of activity is so common).
My parents are health nuts, vegetarian, and only shop organic. My mother never allowed any white sugar or meat in our house. I can count the number of times in my life that I’ve had ice cream. (I’m just trying to give you an idea of the type of environment our house is, and I know this is not usual because of what others tell me).</p>
<p>My parents are very strict about my education and I’m home-schooled my whole life with two tutors, an online curriculum, various classes at local universities, and my mother. Some would call my parents extremist, but they’re all right. They have made it clear that they will not lie for me, and I know what’s expected of me. I want to go to MIT or Carnegie Mellon and I’m passionate about linguistics, CGI, and computer programming.</p>
<p>TL;DR: If you don’t know any alcoholics or druggies, never were impoverished or pregnant out of wed-lock, what is one to do?"</p>
<p>So, I am also a URM (albeit, I guess that doesn’t really matter now that I’m out of school, does it?) with parents of comfortable socio-economic status (I dare not compare and contrast specifics too much…I mean, I certainly wasn’t deprived of white sugar or meat, and I went to public schools). I can also say that I have been pretty fortunate in not being hungry, out of doors, without clothes.</p>
<p>What struck me about this snippet I have quoted here is that it shows a sense of urgency and discipline from your parents. Maybe I’m just projecting from <em>my</em> experience, but I know that coming from a comfortable background, I always thought, “Why are my parents stricter than my [mostly white] friends’ parents? What is there to worry about? We are doing well, so what’s the big deal?” That’s the vibe I get from your parents too, so I wonder if you also think that way some times.</p>
<p>For me, when I dove into it further, I realized that there is a certain tenuousness here. There is a precariousness to being a URM that socioeconomic status doesn’t seem completely able to overcome. </p>
<p>I mean, as another URM, I think it would be great if you could go the rest of your life never having felt discriminated against. I think that would be great. But I feel like there is a pretty rich ground to discuss the sorts of things your parents have set for you to do to have the sort of life that you have vs what other parents set (and maybe since you don’t come from a public school environment, maybe you don’t necessarily see that?) I dunno. I think that would be fascinating. But maybe I’m just a nerd.</p>
<p>Anyway, these are just things to think about – things that not a lot of folks could necessarily write about, but maybe you don’t quite yet have the experiences to make it work.</p>
<p>@"Subversive Asset" </p>
<p>“What struck me about this snippet I have quoted here is that it shows a sense of urgency and discipline from your parents. Maybe I’m just projecting from <em>my</em> experience, but I know that coming from a comfortable background, I always thought, “Why are my parents stricter than my [mostly white] friends’ parents? What is there to worry about? We are doing well, so what’s the big deal?” That’s the vibe I get from your parents too, so I wonder if you also think that way some times.”</p>
<p>I used to think my parents were too strict. But the thing is, I only felt that way if I was around other kids who’s parents weren’t as strict, and I would try to emulate these kids. That proves peer pressure definitely exists and can affect anyone. I think that if I had been sent to public school with the way my parents are, I would have serious problems.</p>
<p>But by now I think I take my school work pretty seriously, as in my mother doesn’t have to bend over backwards to make me study, or my father doesn’t need to raise his voice to make me pay attention to his physics lessons. They are a good influence and I think the values eventually just rub off on a kid, even if he/she thought they were too strict when he/she was younger.<br>
And, yes, they are definitely down on the discipline thing. </p>
<p>“You are actually pretty self-aware. (First of all, I will say that anyone who recognizes their own privilege instead of looking at it as an accusation is ahead of the game. And I want to say this as a compliment. Self-awareness is such a great trait to have and to cultivate.) You recognize that a) you are privileged but that b) you have some things in your life that are not common. It’s just that you don’t seem to think that your unique circumstances are as ‘compelling’ as others (as you wrote in another comment, talking about being deprived of ice cream doesn’t seem like a good essay to put up against someone whose teeth are rotting out…)”</p>
<p>Thank you very much. I actually was a little worried that some people would think I was bragging, (one person did), but I have absolutely nothing to boast about in being relatively well-off.<br>
My father is an engineer. He makes money. I’m a lowly high school student with nothing to my name. My mother has an M.S. And I’m, again, a home schooled high school student.<br>
This is just a simple genetic lottery. You and I have apparently lucked out and we have done nothing. What’s there to brag about?</p>
<p>“1) As others have said, the essay is a way for the admissions folks to find out about <em>you</em>. You don’t need a sob story – although sob stories are gripping. You just need something that shows more about you. As others have discussed, one great thing you can do is just talk about the things that you have <em>accomplished</em>. Since you’re not undergoing x sob story or y catastrophe, what sort of great things do you have the time/resources/support to do?”</p>
<p>And finally, the original question about my essay. </p>
<p>After I posted this thread, that same day, I went to the library and picked up three books that I had ordered filled with real College Application essays. And now I understand why this question may have looked ridiculous to some here. The essays are great, and only one or two I have read are real sob stories.</p>
<p>Since I’ve started high school, I’ve been trying to make sure I have the perfect transcript and studying for standardized tests. I attended a seminar on College Application essays, and the woman kept saying that we had to describe how we grew after overcoming a challenge. She kept emphasizing upon this and insinuating that this is the only way to go. (obviously, she was trying to sabatoge us). And then I watched that video with the Amherst University admissions officers. And then I read some essays that reflected the overcoming-challenge theme. And so naturally I started panicking. Silly.</p>
<p>I have things that I’m passionate about (eg. CGI, Computer programming, and most of all, foreign languages) and life experiences. I guess I’ll be fine.</p>
<p><<<…interested in linguistics, CGI, and computer programming…>>> Just based on that, a school would be interested.</p>
<p>But seriously, I see a LOT of essays, but the best I EVER saw came in 2013 from a young woman who came from a very privileged environment. The subject was kind of “mundane” (her meeting a great guy and their first few hours together), but it was her writing that caught my eye. I told her to not change a word - no editing - no polishing - that it was perfect as it was… Sally Rubenstone, the Dean of the “Ask the Dean” forum agreed with me that it was the best SHE had ever seen as well. That student got into every elite school she applied to (except Yale), and got some great scholarship money from some colleges even though her family could have afforded any school.</p>
<p>So a sob-story is not needed nor is a quirky topic needed - just a compellingly-written essay.</p>
<p>I’m glad you’re feeling better about this process! You did the right thing – reading well-written essays is the best way to learn how to write well yourself.</p>
<p>I personally think the “write about a time you experienced failure” or the “overcoming a challenge” topics are really just done to death. Especially when for most kids it’s about losing the championship game, or getting a poor grade, or not making the team or something. A lot of kids feel like big fat frauds writing those essays, and I don’t wonder.</p>
<p>Write about what interests you and show that you’ve thought about things and issues outside yourself and your own life, and you’ll be fine!</p>