<p>I agree. The best thing would be for my daughter to take a leave of absence and come home. However, she has refused. At this point, she is not thinking clearly because of the depression. She is isolating herself. Communication is at a minimum. Friends and relatives have contacted her, trying to be supportive, and she has not responded. </p>
<p>We have been in continual contact with the college for the past 3 weeks, and have begun to put it all in writing. It is a one-way conversation. They will not tell us much and do not seem to have taken action even though we have told them about a previous breakdown during which my daughter tried to harm herself. Meanwhile, my daughter is getting worse.</p>
<p>We have been taken unawares by all of this. We were so focused on sending our daughter to college that we didn’t really think through what would happen when she got there. Also, we went to college during the years of “in loco parentis” so we had no idea how much more stressful and lonely being a freshman is nowadays. That would be my advice to other parents–think as much about how to help your child transition during freshman year as you did about where they should go to school.</p>
<p>We are continuing to put a plan together. There is a lot we can do…but nothing that guarantees a happy outcome. I really feel that mental health laws need to change. At 18, our daughter does not have the capacity to choose for herself, especially in the state she is currently in.</p>