I would look for a fee-only Advisor. (no commissions)
Been with Vanguard for decades, but its website is better for DIY’ers. (Also had Fidelity accounts for years, and personally found their site too busy – too much stuff on the landing page when I only want to do a single transaction.)
re: American Funds. If you approve of their individual compositions (large cap, small cap, Total Market, etc.), you can likely find a similar fund at much lower cost – or zero cost – at Fidelity, Schwab and Vanguard.
Does the FA only manage the inherited IRA?
“Mom never would have moved her account.” Is the exact wrong reason to keep it open if it ain’t working for you and/or has high fees. (When my last parents, they had 4 full service brokerage accounts, which I eliminated as soon as I got the death cert. Just processed an electronic transfer from the Vanguard website. Never once spoke to their broker/sales person.)
That stood out to me also. Trying to give the FA the benefit of the doubt, but the suggestions don’t seem logical.
“recommendations to get a HELOC, stop accumulating money in my personal savings, and cut my periodic distribution.”
No idea why the HELOC would be needed, unless IRA distributions are being used for expenses that could be covered by a HELOC and the OP is in a high tax bracket? Would still need to weigh taxes associated with distribution vs. HELOC interest charges.
I would agree that there is no reason to take a distribution larger than required if the money is just accumulating in a personal savings account, but then the mention of the HELOC doesn’t make sense.
I agree that Schwab and Fidelity can also be good low cost platforms.
I think everyone will have a different experience with how much they like or don’t like a website and I’ve heard the complaint about Vanguard’s site before. Personally, I don’t find it unintuitive/difficult but everyone’s mileage will vary on which website works best for them.
Many FAs will use Fidelity and / or Schwab as their platform - but you’re still paying a FA - and many FAs use American Funds (and they likely have lower cost versions) and others like DFA.
If one is going to use a FA, sure you can find one that only uses certain funds but some of the fund groups with expense do perform better than others.
I’d imagine the trick would be to find an advisor you are comfortable with, first and foremost, should you not want to self manage.
Of course, Vanguard/Fidelity/Schwab can get you a FA for a small fee or you can even robo manage that might be just as effective and at a lower cost. There are various robo services, some of which come with a hybrid model so there is someone to talk to if you need that as well.
The HELOC suggestion was a big red flag to me. Especially in this relatively high interest rate environment (historically still pretty low).
Also, wanting to increase your personal savings isn’t a problem as far as I can see. If it helps SWAN (sleep well at night) then by all means, keep increasing it.
This IRA is/was a gift. @sabaray don’t stress about making ‘perfect’ decisions, make the decisions that work for you. I’m assuming since it is an inherited IRA, you need to liquidate it within 10 years anyways (If I’m wrong, let me know). Wishing you well.
Unless the IRA was inherited pre-Secure Act and allows stretch IRA distributions. If inherited after 2020 (I think), then yes, ten year timeframe to empty the account.
To answer a few questions: I inherited the advisor. I knew her for years as my mom’s advisor. Their firm had H’s 401k which converted to an IRA with them. We had a lot going on in 2025 so didn’t really pay a lot of attention to investments but I wanted to get on top of things for 2026 so requested the meeting. We have accounts with another firm but I wouldn’t feel comfortable asking them to handle this. I am not worried about 30 years down the road as it is highly unlikely either of us will be around.
I do have to empty the account in ten years. H asked where we were on the timeline for this and we were told “they were keeping track of it”. There are projects we want to do at the house and a HELOC might make sense but my goal is to sell the property and move to a smaller footprint. I did want to cut back on my distribution (which was larger than most would recommend) but we had significant medical and veterinary expenses that aren’t going away any time soon and now I’m figuring out my cash flow. I also helped both of my children financially last year and that won’t be happening going forward.
I appreciate everyone who has responded. I’m going to head over to Bogleheads for some education and move on from there.
HELOCs can be ok for large, unintended expenses IF you are in a high marginal tax bracket today and IF you expect the rate to drop in the next few years. For example, you are in the 32+ bracket today, but by the 10-year time you will have to exhaust the inherited IRA you may be below the 22% bracket.
But if your expected taxes will not change by withdrawing say, $30k from the IRA for a new roof, paying a HELOC interest makes little sense to me as you will have to withdraw that amount in the next few years anyway.
How many more years left to complete the inherited IRA distribution? Will you be retiring before the end of the 10 years?
(personally hate debt, so I am biased, but I know some bogleheads borrow against a HELOC to invest in the market. Margining your house is crazy to me, but some do it.)
Another circumstance is to have it in your back pocket as a liquidity bridge if you are otherwise fully invested and there is a market drop. You are betting the dip is shorter term and your investments will return greater than the interest cost during this period. Having different sources of (options in) liquidity is always a good thing.
My in-laws FA seems keen for us to keep my in-laws money in house. We let him keep the money they gifted us this year in an account to sorta compare his approach to our normal fidelity one.
My mil brags all the time that she lives on her social security and doesn’t spend any of the money in their retirement savings accounts. I have no idea what she’s saving it for except for the fact that she doesn’t want to spend it. Or gift much either since this is only the second year we’ve received any gifts from them. And that’s because the FA and accountant have been trying to get them to make gifts. They aren’t huge gifts either but kinda a bare minimum of which we are happy for but they don’t impact our lives to be honest.
We gave our first years gift, 1/2 to fund our granddaughter college fund and the half to help fund a wedding for the other.
Anyways, if a FA that was my parents FA would question the money I spent, I would feel that was gatekeeping. A scold so to speak from the grave of my parent. I don’t think it would make me comfortable to be questioned about how I was spending money that I had inherited.
yes, I get that, but you are betting/margining your home to do it. Why not just margin yoru portfolio for relatively smaller, one-time expenses, such as a new roof? (in many cases, roof associations have lenders).
But the risk of say, taking out a large chunk for medical bills, only to find one disabled, and can’t return to work to pay off teh HELOC?
When we met with the executor of my in laws’ estate (both of my in laws were alive at the time), he mentioned that my MIL wants us to keep “her” money invested the way she has invested it since she inherited it from her parents … she never spent any of it other than the dividends. He did say that it is just a wish, as it’s not actually enforceable. MIL has done a couple other things to try to control from her future grave. H doesn’t believe in ghosts, so he plans to do what is best for our family when (and if) he inherits money from her.
I don’t know how others feel but sometimes I feel that our meeting with our financial advisors, they like to emphasize leaving a large chunk of money to our children and less about maximizing our lives that we have spend our working life accumulating.
It always starts out, if you continue to spend exactly the same amount that you are spending right now, you will have this huge chunk of money to your children. Won’t that be great to pass your wealth on?
I guess, but I also want to travel and make improvements to the house which are going to cost more than the bare minimum that they think we will be spending for the rest of our lives.
I certainly don’t want to run out of money. And it would be nice to have money for the kids to inherit. It’s not what moves me either.
But I’m retired, we still have parents alive and so it may be well into our children’s retirement also that they inherit any money. Since the tables are for us to live into our 90’s
When the FA said “stop accumulating money in my personal savings” maybe she meant that the money could be making more in a high-yield savings account rather than a bank account, if that’s where it is? In that case, I would agree with the FA. That’s the only time I give her any credit. No pun intended.
If I asked where we were on the timeline for the IRA and was told “they were keeping track of it” without giving me a direct answer, I would be furious and would’ve pushed back.
Like you, I let my mom stay with a “FA” who I didn’t care for as my mom didn’t have enough money for it to cost her a lot and my mom would’ve never left her, but at one point she sold my mom an annuity (she was 88 at the time, I think) and I laid into ol’ Tiffany and threatened to report her to the state if she didn’t get her out of it immediately without penalty. I don’t like when people take advantage of the elderly. i wonder whether the FA is used to your mom not pushing back and she thinks you won’t either. Personally, I’d say adios to that FA and, if you don’t want to put it under your current person, just roll it over to Vanguard and handle it yourself. If it’s truly substantial (more than $500k) and you want a little oversight you can pay .3% and get one of their personal advisers to keep it all in check. We started using one two years ago as we started approaching retirement and wanted some guidance on Roth conversions and other stuff. I had handled all our investments on my own but am willing to pay a little as a backstop and so dh has someone to help him should I go first. They don’t do super in-depth tax planning or the like, but you gain access to tools that are helpful. And you can use your person at the other firm to advise.
Once you figure out your cash flow, you can change your distribution, right? You seem to have it pretty much under control.
That’s sounds (to me) like the advisor is actually saying, “Wouldn’t it be wonderful for these assets to continue producing an income for me, hopefully I will be able to convince your heirs to keep this money here too”.
We lean towards the “give with warm hands” philosophy so we’ve always matched $ for $ for our children to fund their Roth accounts once they got part time jobs, and as they grew from children to young adults - helping them move their savings from a passbook savings account to CDs to taxable brokerage accounts. We will probably continue to give yearly gifts for them to add to their brokerage accounts - starting early means that each of them will have plenty in their retirement from relatively little investments.
Our retirement accounts are for us, not them. With all the love in the world, I am going to spend that money as I choose and not think about how nice it would be for my children to get a big check after I die.
I hope you get to do all the travel and home improvements you want - you earned that money and I hope you get to enjoy it.
Amen. We did not work hard all our lives to make our son rich. We gave him the best education we could and taught him how to build his own wealth. The rest is up to him. If there’s anything left when we’re gone, it’ll be a windfall for him, but leaving an inheritance was never part of our financial plan, and I would leave any FA whose advice continually contradicted our stated requirements. @beebee3 is right:
There are articles on what the mega-wealthy do. Probably none of them on this thread. The articles say that the mega-wealthy rarely sell stocks but instead borrow against the portfolio each year when they need cash to live on. So they don’t have cap gains and take advantage of the automatic step-up on basis at death. So limited taxes and tax deduction for the interest, I believe. So the suggestion of a HELOC maybe will have you keeping company with the mega-wealthy.
@beebee3 and @ChoatieMom, both of our FAs volunteer to meet with our kids about their financial lives. The best of them consulted with ShawD on benefits when she first started working and again when she switched jobs, did a detail financial plan of how she would be able to afford a two-family house, and I think estimated how long she had to get a job after her move to California (it takes a while for NPs to get certified and hence employers tend to wait until they are in CA to offer a job). I think they even start with scholarship applications for college. Smart strategy to be trusted by the kids.
Our FA has worked with our son since he was 11. He is well on his way to financial independence. This is the inheritance we’ve given him and what I meant by teaching him to build his own wealth.
Our FA talks extensively about goals at the start of the relationship, and he asks whether anything has changed at each semi annual meeting. He operates based on our goals. For us, making sure we have enough to cover our needs based on a long life expectancy is the goal. We don’t want to run out, even if H ends up living to 100 (as it appears his mom will do). That means our kids may well inherit money when we’re gone, but that’s a byproduct of the goal … so we’re not worried about positioning the money to be tax efficient for them. If they inherit, they may have to pay a hefty tax bill. Oh, well - it’s free money. That’s the difference between me & wealthy people, I guess.
