<p>I have trouble parting with books, even the kid/teen books. So I just get a rid of a few at a time, it’s better than never brutally attacking the bookshelves. But it’s better than nothing. </p>
<p>Per big space-eating clutter, my mom has a trick to take a picture of it before give-away. That way you still have the memory.</p>
<p>^ The picture is also good when you do your taxes.:)</p>
<p>I know someone who did that with her children’s art work and crafts. She took pictures of their creations knowing that it was impossible to keep all of them. i thought it was a brilliant solution.</p>
<p>“DS has been in the dorms for less that 2 weeks and H spent today clearing out DS’s bedroom”
-This is another extreme. My D. has been out of house for 6 years and she still has her bedroom filled with her stuff (and battroom with all her toiletries) and few things in other spots of the house. She is always welcomed to visit us. She loves being back and we love her visiting us. I would not touch any of her things without her permission. Our house is D’s home also. Eventually she will ge her own house, but intill it happens this situation will remain. I do not need this bedroom and it also is used as a guest bedroom.</p>
<p>When D was home this summer, she did a closet/drawer purge. I went through the piles (to figure out what to donate, what to pitch, etc.). I put all the old underwear and ratty shoes in a garbage bag. H asked what was in there, I told him, he said “well, I’ll have to look through it…”</p>
<p>I burn. During the day. While H is at work. I am very thankful for this opportunity.</p>
<p>Do you think we need homemade VCR tapes of a football game he attended in 1979? I’m sure made with a crappy camera and after a few refreshments.</p>
<p>On a BETA VCR tape? Yeah, me neither :)</p>
<p>MIL is a hoarder. It will take dumpsters when she passes. My mother has huge collections (antiques, antique pie plates, china roosters, etc.). Her things are immaculately clean, well displayed, or stored. She grew up poor and has SO MUCH STUFF. I am dreading cleaning that one out too.</p>
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<p>This is the best policy to ensure there’s no later issues with violations of one’s sense of security regarding one’s personal property or worse, trust issues vis a vis those who aren’t sensitive about it. </p>
<p>In my case, it was my parents volunteering me to help neighbors without checking in with me to see if 1. I was willing to do it and 2. If my schedule allowed for it.</p>
<p>They ended up learning a hard lesson when I was home on winter break when it turned out I had to work late that evening and wouldn’t have been inclined to help those particular neighbors considering they waited until the NIGHT BEFORE the SAT exam to ask for tutoring help. :(</p>
<p>Now, they treat me as I’d treat anyone whose possessions/time is going to be imposed upon…check with said individual concerned first before doing anything else.</p>
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<p>It may have had deep sentimental value and as someone who has heard much grousing from colleagues/friends about how their spouses give no respect to their hobbies/possessions/time, I don’t think that’s a good practice for the long term viability of genuine friendships…much less a marriage.</p>
<p>A friend rooming with me who pulled the same stunt with my hobbies/possessions/time will at the very minimum, get a loud earful from me and if severe enough…be told to leave permanently. </p>
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<p>The fact you have this knowledge now means you have a better chance of preplanning how to research the value & dispose of those collections so you can get the most money for it with less/no pressure from selling off in a hurry. </p>
<p>The ones with the latter pressure or worse, just want to be rid of the stuff in a hurry for emotional reasons are the ones who end up taking a bath with CL bargain hunters like yours truly.</p>
<p>[Change</a> your thinking to get the streamlined, organized home of your dreams, with these guides to overcoming mental decluttering snags](<a href=“http://www.houzz.com/ideabooks/16057277/list/Blast-Decluttering-Roadblocks-Once-and-for-All]Change”>Blast Decluttering Roadblocks Once and for All)</p>
<p>My favorite from the article:</p>
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<p>Links within the article point to some other really great articles.</p>
<p>Another here who is in mad decluttering mode. At a certain point I just can’t take the clutter. Piles of stuff around the house stress me out. </p>
<p>Thankfully my daughter doesn’t care. She knows I keep things of sentimental value (school things for example that she’d just as well toss) and I won’t throw out anything she has used in a year. </p>
<p>Books however are off limits. I read and reread.</p>
<p>"When D was home this summer, she did a closet/drawer purge. "
-D. has done many of these purges. I like them because I usually pick clothes for myself. I am very lazy to shop, hate it.</p>
<p>Here is what H “rescued” from a bag of stuff I was pitching:</p>
<p>about 6 pair of cheap plastic earrings from the 80s
8 individual socks (no mate)
about a dozen used ear plugs</p>
<p>^^^^Ewwwwww . . . .</p>
<p>When we moved Son out of his freshman dorm, he was the last to move out. H went around to the other rooms and scavenged. I didn’t mind the plastic hangers, or even the laundry detergent. But he brought home someone’s half used bottle of mouth wash. Ewww is right.</p>
<p>I’m a pack rat and a collector (of books, especially). My biggest problem is getting rid of papers that “might” interest me some day–old letters, programs, etc. I suppose I could scan some of it, but that would take up a lot of time, too.</p>
<p>My wife is a packrat, too–but of completely different categories of stuff, so we have trouble purging together.</p>
<p>I am a minimalist and am happier to regret a few items lost over the years than to have more. H is from a family that never parts with anything. MUCH to my amazement he gave me many ties and jeans to give away today and did not pull anything out of my many piles.
I am actually worried as this is just not the man I have known for 33 years…</p>
<p>for most of our married life (and even the kids stuff) I would put things in black bags and take them to the garbage the night before and that way they could not retrieve…</p>
<p>When my kids were younger, I would pack up stuff they weren’t using and put it in a box in the basement without telling them. That way if they were looking for an item, it could be retrieved. I never brought one thing back upstairs and after a year in the basement, I donated the stuff and started over.</p>
<p>I did that too onward. I can’t remember the kids ever really needing much back.</p>
<p>Set a goal of straightening the living room bookshelves today, and found four books that Happykid needs to decide about, two books I might need while teaching this fall, and one to definitely toss into the Friends of the Library booksale bin.</p>
<p>Not much of an improvement at all. 
Especially as those “hm, I might need these when I’m teaching that class” books need to be squeezed back into the shelf somehow…</p>
<p>I must say that you guys are making me feel a little better that it’s not just us. Between my mother and my husband, I’m getting pretty frustrated.</p>
<p>My parents are finally selling their home and downsiizing. So once a week she gives me stuff that “you might want”. This week’s lot included a VCR tape of a movie she had taped off tv in 1981, four empty cardboard tubes from wrapping paper, three shirts I’m pretty sure she purchased in the 70’s, a toaster that doesn’t work, senseo coffee pods that expired years ago and I don’t know what else because I tend to just throw it all out.</p>
<p>My husband saves every container he can get his hands on from yogurt, apple juice to empty tin cans. I crush them when he’s not looking and hide them in the kitchen garbage but we still have a basement full. When he cleans up if I get mad enough, he goes through every piece of paper and asks if I need them first. Things like a receipt for a drill bit he bought in 2002 or a bank statement from 1984. Does he seriously think that even if I were to suddenly decide I needed one of those he would have been able to find it?</p>
<p>I was talking to the neighbor across the street while we both complained about our husbands. She said she had finally gotten him to throw out two bar stools that had been in the house when they moved in in 1988. He put them at the curb as we spoke and my husband came across the street and put one of them in our garage.</p>