<p>To go- not to go-
will default to (my now favorite term, adopted as it might be)…“SOC”…“secondary, optional and conditional.”</p>
<ol>
<li><p>The candidate needs to report. For everyone else, SOC.</p></li>
<li><p>If your candidate wants to go it alone, great. If not, great. It is no badge of “honor,” “courage” or mark of “maturity,” “independence” or “worldliness” to go it alone, nor is it some mark of weakness or lack-thereof “not to.” </p></li>
<li><p>BTDT. Went with 26 other “family” members. They couldn’t keep me away if they tried. Dad wasn’t being denied either. Ditto to the aunts and uncles, “Oma” (at 80) and “Nana” (not much younger)- add in cousins and godparents, sisters and girlfriend, and one “very little” puppy…the later dressed in her own plebe gear! (SHE made it to the front page of the local paper- go figure!!!) You can bet that picture has a prominant spot in the scrapbook on the “I-DAY” page!!! They all joined us for 3 really great days in Annapolis… and each said they “wouldn’t have missed it for the world”… and several told us they were “honored” to have attended!!! All to get up at o-dark-thirty, for a bus ride to the yard, a fast-moving line in front of alumni hall, then the “time to kill” until the oath of office… 90 degree heat- one thunderstorm??? (or was that the day before???)…and not one complaint…“it was an honor to attend!!!”</p></li>
<li><p>In retrospect: would not have done it ANY other way. It was a great day, and up to that point in time I don’t think I ever felt “prouder” of our mid - and of ALL OF THEM… than watching them take the oath of office for the first time. I am finding out it was just the start of “many” proud moments.</p></li>
<li><p>If you can afford it, and you have the time, then make the time to go. If you can’t, don’t beat yourself up over it- there will be lots of plebes on their own and lots of families that will adopt them for the day. The world will not end and you will not be labeled a “bad parent” if you opt out. Nor are you a “helo-parent” if you opt in. This is a day long in the making, and don’t let anyone try to tarnish it with “it’s time to cut the apron strings” rubbish. With time, it all comes. </p></li>
<li><p>All the above, of course, SOC to what YOUR new plebe wants. If they make it SOC, then default to what you can do! </p></li>
<li><p>In some circumstances there are family events to attend the day before I-Day. While this may not apply to some, it will apply to others. Coaches, foundation folks- to name just 2- have events for the incoming plebe and family the day prior to I-Day. If you can, attend- it’s a nice icebreaker to meet other families. If not, don’t worry- lots of other opportunities.</p></li>
<li><p>No, you will not be moving things into the dorm (thank goodness for that). In fact, you won’t be doing anything much between the time of your last hug at Alumni Hall until you see them after the Oath on Stribling. You, and hundreds more like you, will be roaming around the yard, smiling at every glimpse of any mid walking anywere, heck, smiling at everyone and anyone, finding your way through the maze that is the Midstore, buying your “plebe of whatever” tee shirt… and making sure your Mid’s name is on it (lest someone made a mistake!!!)…perhaps stopping in the Chapel to light a candle and sharing a few words of “thanks” with the Almighty. The time will drag and it will fly, and then you get to see them all file out for the Oath of Office and then you get to see them for just a short time after that - just enough to reassure you that “all is well” and it’s “one day down.” And then you go home and you sit in their room and you look at their baby pictures and you wonder how you ever got to this point in time and how fast the years have gone. And you feel overwhelming pride and you cry all over again, and it’s “all good.”</p></li>
<li><p>Hyper masculine environmnet or not (not sure I agree with that- it is what you make it)- the one common denominator is the “look” on all the faces that find their way to Stribling… a combination of “joy, relief, exhaustion, excitement”… there is no mistaking it, and it’s everywhere- on the faces of plebes, the moms and dads, the officers, and even on the cadre (this is a “first” for them as well!!!) And then everyone falls back into formation and march back into bancroft, and you make that longer than long trip home. Or wherever. </p></li>
<li><p>lastly- I-Day minus “one” not so aweful- it’s all what you make it. We heard from some families that spent the day doing “fun” stuff- visits to Washington DC, Busch Gardens, Ocean city… for us, it was a b’bque hosted by the lax team “officers,” then a wine-and-cheese gathering hosted by the foundation folks- then we all gathered for (what we all teased) was the “last supper”… found a great crabhouse right on the water… a beautiful night of cracking crab with friends and family (another “first” for many!)… then a night stroll by the city dock area for some ice cream… then home to bed. Not sure if anyone slept. No matter. </p></li>
</ol>
<p>Would not have changed one blessed thing- except for the whole flip-flop episode, but that was the “morning of” and is stuff of CC lore!!</p>
<p>BOTTOM LINE:
This is not a “one size fits all.” Do what your heart tells you and “full steam ahead.” No regrets.</p>