<p>RTR: too bad we don’t live closer…you could join me walking…but not today; wayyy to cold!!</p>
<p>btw, don’t think it’s because you work that you haven’t formed these relationships…I have been working on and (mostly) off for years now and I still only have 2-3 people in town that I can actually relate to on many levels…</p>
<p>RTR -
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<p>See, there’s the challenge. If you are anything like me, I avoid the whole gossiping, talking about teachers, analyzing what everyone’s child is doing stuff. Even on CC you see me on the Cafe, I like conversation about things other than my kids - not that I don’t mention them, but not as the main topic.</p>
<p>I made a real effort a couple of years ago to strengthen my “girl” network. I have a bible study I attend, I walk with another woman, and I try to get together with a few other friends for breakfast occasionally. Some of the women in the bible group are far more conservative than I am, but they are women with good hearts and it helps to accept other points of view. We may not be best friends, but it is wonderful to see them each week and I have grown fonder of them the longer we are together.</p>
<p>I think the same is true for any kind of group that has a purpose of some sort. Book club, walking club, knitting club, etc. Since we women tend to outlive men, we really need some girl pals. My 85 year old MIL is a pistol - she is as sharp as a tack, works out on a rowing machine, a treadmill and a bike for at least 45 minutes three times a week - but she has lost her few girlfriends. So, I have learned from her and am trying to make some changes in my life.</p>
<p>I got a facial last week when we were on vacation. The women who did it was in her mid seventies…and said she was still happy to be working. But she mentioned that she lost her husband two years ago…and talked about how very close they were…and how they did everything together. Her advice was to reach out and make friends BEFORE you need them. Easier said then done I know…but joining groups and arranging lunches and breakfasts out is a good step.</p>
<p>I got invited to join our neighborhood women’s bowling league. Even though I’m having problems with my arm…I’m going to do it…even if I have to bowl left handed!</p>
<p>Re old in general…when did my knees start making that awful crunchy noise when going downstairs?</p>
<p>knees and stairs: Try to “engage your core” (sort of pull your belly button in toward your spine and upwards) when using stairs. That helps me to maintain a posture that is easier on my knees.</p>
<p>Mafool, i don’t know why, but that last tip just got me laughing so hard</p>
<p>RTR do you live near me?</p>
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<p>DH and I met in college. We have different hometowns, and when we got married we moved to a different state for his job. Despite having lived here for 20+ years, I don’t feel like I’ve cultivated a lot of close friendships either. We have a lot of acquaintances - I did all that volunteering stuff, because I was home full-time for many years and now work part-time - but somehow whenever the particular event was over or my kids moved to the next level in school, I didn’t keep up the connections I made with other women. My daughter has noticed that many of her friends’ parents seem to have more friends than DH and I do. I think in many cases her friends’ parents grew up around here, and have friends and family in the area they’ve known since childhood. </p>
<p>My parents moved away from the town I grew up in, and DH and I live hundreds of miles from our hometowns and our college, so somehow I’ve lost those connections as well. </p>
<p>I have already found myself surveying the parents I know to see whose youngest kid is the same age as D, so that next year when she’s gone to college I’ll have other empty-nesters to hang out with!</p>
<p>All My Children old timers (I think I watched it in Jr Hi)- just one question, did you like Kim Delaney as an adult actress anywhere near as much as when she played Jenny?</p>
<p>I have a tendency to “hole up” at home, so I make myself go out and socialize. It doesn’t help that I work at home, or that I no longer have kids in the house which used to provid ready-made socializing with other parents. Now, I have some friends of all ages (even some my kids’ ages), which provides nice variety. When I get tired of hearing all about everyone else’s menopausal symptoms and commiseration (which I do plenty of myself), I go hang out with the “kids” for some light fun. I enjoy their spontaneity and hearing about all the latest stuff, but I also don’t envy them all the hard life stuff they’re grappling with. They make me feel like the wise old one. I used to feel self conscious being the youngest or the oldest in the room but now I realize that it was all in my head. Young people appreciate an “old” person who doesn’t talk down to them, and elderly people appreciate a “young’un” who likes listening to their stories.</p>
<p>How come when your mom was 50 you thought she was older than dirt, and your 50 doesn’t seem so “old”?</p>
<p>Now 50, and thankfully my face hands and neck are holding up well. The decision to cut my hair really short almost 10 years ago really works for me. I notice all of my gray hairs popping out whenever I start to let my hair grow out so quickly to the barbershop I go to get my hair cut (the inequity in the pricing getting a hair cut at the barbershop and the same haircut and the hairdressers). </p>
<p>My big question, why does my body sound like a box of rice krispies snapping, crackling and popping , sometimes at the craziest times? If age is a state of mind, I am grateful to work in day high school, because the kids do keep me young :).</p>
<p>I am still a loyal and faithful fan of the channel 7 daytime lineup which I dvr everyday. I actually like Kim Delaney as Claudia Joy on Army Wives. If you haven’t had a chance to read I Feel Bad About My Neck by Nora Ephron. I found myself laughing out loud and shaking my head affirmatively.</p>
<p>Kim Delaney was great as Jenny, but I really enjoy her on Army Wives. While I was not a regular NYPD Blues watcher, I thought she was very successful there. I guess watching her as a young lover the same age as myself at the time allowed me to connect with her.</p>
<p>My family makes fum of me for watching sappy Lifetime movies and shows, which I tend to do on Sunday while doing laundry. I find Army Wives and Drop Dead Diva just the thing I need on Sunday nights before a busy work week.</p>
<p>I miss Drop Dead Diva 
I can’t wait for Jane to come back.</p>
<p>was disappointed that Kim Delaney wasn’t invited to the AMC special on January 4th; then I realized it was only returning characters who were “alive”…</p>
<p>not to derail the thead, but I thought that special was ridiculous…would have been much better to bring back old characters “out of character” if you know what I mean…</p>
<p>anybody know where Julie Barr (Brooke)has turned up? Or has she retired?</p>
<p>Back to talking about friends –</p>
<p>I seem to suddenly have many many of them. I’ve always worked (except during forced periods of unemployment), so I have many work friends whom I’ve kept in touch with, of varying ages. When S2 was graduating from HS, in 2003, one of his best friends’ moms got all the parents of those friends together for dinner, and it’s turned into a more-or-less quarterly routine. Now, with one of the couples getting divorced, it’s turned into a women’s lunchtime thing.</p>
<p>I’ve also gotten to know very well the mother of S2’s girlfriend in HS (they’re no longer together) and through her I’ve met several wonderful women. We now meet at the diner for breakfast the first Saturday of every month – five or six of us.</p>
<p>I have another woman friend (mom of S2’s best friend in elementary school) whom I walk the dogs with. I feel like I must have 20 women I could call on if need be. I am blessed that way!!</p>
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<p>Brooke is coming back to Pine Valley. She should be in town around late February. I have always liked Brooke. Personally, I think she was Adam’s best wife. There is going to be some really good zingers between her and Erica.</p>
<p>[Julia</a> Rose Barr - Emmy Award Winning Actress on All My Children](<a href=“Page not found”>http://www.juliarosebarr.com/)</p>
<p>sybbie: how the heck did you find that link? thanks…Julie lives in NJ; surprised she is shlepping to LA but I’m assuming this is a brief stint?? maybe because her d started college…or maybe other stuff…good to know though</p>
<p>edit: nm,thought there was a younger child; my bad…</p>
<p>I think her child has graduated college. I remember there was a time when her daughter was working on Guiding Light as Lizzie Spaulding.</p>
<p>Back to old - going to be 50 next month, and I love this -
I think my brain went into mush-zone after I menopaused about 3 years ago; mush-brain plus ADD. I have low-thryoid and I seem to be fine for energy during the work day, but I am in my jammies at 6, and ready to read or watch tv. (I do have to get up at 5:45, so I have a little bit of excuse…) I know I should exercise more, but I lack the desire to sweat! :eek:</p>
<p>50 is old??? H turns 60 and will retire this spring, I’m 3 years behind him in age (long retired). 60 seems old. We both have wrinkly skin in places (mine started after those hormones were surgically removed- hard when you go from smooth to wrinkly hands in your late 40’s). My early 50’s were a fear of dying- my mother was a month shy of 54 when she died of a heart attack and I knew only one living grandparent as the others died before they were 60- I’m like my mother with a major exception- I never smoked. But, my H tells me only the good die young, so I don’t have to worry. My F is going strong at 83- in part thanks to modern cardiac care (and yes, he fits H’s statement). I think 50 snuck up on us differently since our son was still in HS then- we were too busy and many younger parents around us with same grade kids. An empty nest changes your focus.</p>
<p>No. 50 is not old. 50 is not old.</p>
<p>I am 55. 55 is not old, either.</p>
<p>That reminds me- awhile ago (okay, a few decades ago) my B-in-law came out with how he was really 10, not 4, years younger than my sister. The logic- he was only 33 and she was 37, he was really just about 30 whereas she was close to 40…(or was it 23/27/20/30?)</p>