<p>lmkh … glad that your D was able to finish off that last show.</p>
<p>I agree with many of the posters above … finish your commitments, take care of health, make sure your violin is fitted correctly, avoid pit orchestra if you didn’t enjoy it overall, etc.</p>
<p>The add’l piece of advice from me is because your D is a junior (versus a freshman). As a parent, we want to help them work through these battles and struggles and help them in any way possible. If she is going to make it as a musician and many other things she could study, she will need to learn to speak for herself and stand up for herself when she is feeling left out, under appreciated, or unrecognized. In the case of this experience, I would step back as a parent. If your D complains about this experience, coach her through the process of working through it rather than live out out the details with her. For example, if the time waste is the biggest problem, a conversation could start like this:</p>
<p>D: “I hate pit orchestra and I refuse to go to another rehearsal.”
M: “Sorry to hear this honey, what is going on?”<br>
D: “My back hurts, it’s a waste of time, and I’m not even getting free tickets for my family.”
M: “Wow, sounds like something has been building up and you are frustrated. What is bothering you the most?”
D: “I have so much on my plate and I lost 3 hours just sitting there watching idiots run the show very inefficiently.”
M: “So what have you said to your conductor?”
D: “Nothing, I just wanted to vent to you.” or “Conductor, hmm, I never thought of telling him how frustrating this is … I’ll casually mention it tomorrow.”<br>
M: “Sounds like a great idea … I’m sure he’ll want to know if his pit crew is annoyed. What else is going on at school?”
D: “My back has been hurting … I think it’s because I’m sitting in a chair for 7 hours.”
M: “Hmm, that’s not good. How are those back exercises going?”</p>
<p>Anyway, you get the point.</p>