<p>Curmudgeon, why stop? Just go to a game. Get in your car, truck, on your motorcycle, Segue, bicycle, airplane, and visit. </p>
<p>I was unwilling to break the enjoyable habit of attending performances, so I haven’t - that’s why my budget now includes frequent trips to England. I’m leaving Thursday for a weekend trip to see my son play Billy Bigelow in Carousel. If he keeps up this performing fever, I may end up taking up to eight more trips over the next two years, one show per term plus the Edinburgh Fringe. </p>
<p>You can’t take it with you, right? And if your D doesn’t mind you showing up, I think you should go to every event you can. </p>
<p>“Don’t dream it, be it!” (Frankenfurter, RHPS)</p>
<p>Wow yulsie! Sounds like so much fun! Have a great time!</p>
<p>Now I have the image of cur. Head of George Clooney in Brother Where Art Thou and Intolerable Cruelties (slickster), body of George Foreman, riding a Segue through the brambles blowing across his dusty ranch, chickens running for cover as the batting machine launches another frisbee…</p>
<p>All of our children play ultimate and it is a huge part of their lives. The biggest attraction is the intense play but all within the “spirit of the game.” The teams can be extremely competitive on the field but 2 minutes after the game is over there is great fun going on between the teams including who can come up with the best post game cheer “honoring” if you will, the other team. </p>
<p>The intercollegiate teams love it when parents and friends show up to cheer them on but also to bring food and drinks. When an entire team stayed overnight at out house they were a delight, couldn’t have been more appreciative, and left no trace of even being there. </p>
<p>In terms of the boy/girl ratio, it mostly depends on who shows up to play. So it does vary. It’s a great sport that all ages can enjoy.</p>
<p>Sorry, just picked up this thread. I am so nonsports minded, but my D played volleyball. This year she gave it up because of so many other commitments, but I still attend games when my commitments allow.</p>
<p>Curmudgeon is probably so happy about the election that he’s forgotten about basketball ;). (me too)</p>
<p>Another thought: start a scholarship at your D’s high school for gifted scholar-athletes, then you can give a speech (which we would all pay to hear) every year at Senior Awards Night (or your equivalent) and relive the state championship and how special your daughter’s experience was. Our school has a couple of family-based scholarships like that. Some of them are just pocket change, but the little scholarships together can add up to books for the year and mean a lot.</p>
<p>I have been reading this thread as a detached observer (well, as detached as anyone can be after following the saga of Cur’s daughter over the past year). </p>
<p>But my daughter had a choir concert last night. I didn’t go (5 hours away); it’s the first time I’ve ever missed one of her performances.</p>
<p>I am no longer detached and am joining the pity party.</p>
<p>patient , I’ve actually thought about that little scholarship thing. Briefly. I need to re-adress that. Good thinking. </p>
<p>I’ve actually been doing a little better. The election helped some. My new found knowledge of UF (thanks to y’all) helped some. One of D’s teammates from last year just inked her National Letter of Intent today. I went. That was actually not too bad. So I was thinking school ball will be pretty cool still. </p>
<p>mezzomom, I hope you get over yours faster than I’m getting over mine.</p>
<p>Well Curmudgeon, I am glad you are feeling better.</p>
<p>There are players in my son’s league that are going to play, and play well in college, a few, division 1. I just found out the coaches in the league got together and voted my son “player of the year”.</p>
<p>So all that crap I wrote earlier about it’s ok for the kids to move on, and they know best, etc., etc…</p>
<p>Forget what I wrote. It was all nonsense. :(</p>
<p>Boo hoo, sniff, sniff…damn those gifted athletes and musicians, eh?</p>
<p>I wish my husband knew the game well enough to coach little kids. He’d love that. cur, go the jmmom route and help some Texas kids get scholarships. I did that for a 6’10" bball player from my son’s team. It’s fun, even though cheers only got off the bench if her mom came to the game. (She came once. She had six kids. I was so nervous, I could’t dribble to save my life.). Anyway, I started this kid with Five Star camp, urged him on to a fifth year boarding school and then gave advice through his placement into a Div III bball school. That kid is going to get a BArch out of it too. Sweet!</p>
<p>I miss my “sport” (if you can call it that-no competitions) from HS greatly–aikido (a Japanese martial art). While a part of it is missing the wonderful friends I made at my dojo, I also miss all the techniques I learned and how they became sort of automatic after a few weeks of continual practice. Alas, I have neither the time nor the means of transportation to get to the dojo here. It does free up sometime, but I’d be lying to say I don’t regret giving it up. However, athletics are a cost-benefit thing and sometimes the cost is just too high.</p>
<p>My daughter called yesterday and casually mentioned her UF team. What - you’re on a team? Yes, mom, I told you that. No, you didn’t. Well, I’m on a team - not the best, but the second best - we have fun. OK, so Carleton really got you into ultimate, huh? No, Mom, I’ve always loved playing ultimate. Uh, I don’t remember you ever playing ultimate in high school. Yes, I did - 3 or 4 times. </p>
<p>And for some reason, she seems to like playing ultimate at midnight. In freezing weather. She’s asked for cleats for Christmas.</p>
<p>I vote for adoption (or at least fostering) too. Some kids could really use an enthusiastic parent in their corner. I know a kid who has been in HS plays, sometimes leading roles, and his Dad doesn’t even come to see the plays. You could brighten up your own life and some kid’s life too. Glom on to someone. And go to the Ultimate things too. Your daughter sounds great.</p>
<p>I didn’t read much of this thread, so maybe this is already out there, but I suggest you can still stay involved at the HS. Our “Band Mom” 's kid graduated last year, and she’s still our mom. She says it’s her hobby – and the rest of us depend on her!</p>
<p>These are all great suggestions–but I know too that sometimes you just have to grieve for a loss. It is impossible to describe all of the layers and levels of emotional investment when your child has played at a very high level of competition. Certainly in time it all fits into place as a wonderful part of the mosaic that is your life, and your life as a parent. But it takes a while to sift through the memories and emotions and come to a peaceful place and then you can reach out in all of these new directions and they’ll be fantastic I am sure. Cur, we’re all here for you while you take this path.</p>
<p>(I am also giving myself a pep talk for when I find myself there).</p>