<p>The stats I’ve seen indicate that alcohol and/or drugs are part of the large majority of teen sex activity. I saw where teen births almost hit 500,000 in 2007. I believe the most recent stats also indicate that in the US the average age at first intercourse is just about 16. </p>
<p>Seems a strech to speculate that hooking up in HS and college is accounted for by guys getting the girls drunk. At least during my personal “trip” through adolescence and much more recently during the adolescence of my college senior son, there were party guys and party girls.</p>
<p>The reports that I got from the recent college experience were that condoms were made available in all the dorms and that the party people liquored themselves up, went out and drank more, and, if they found another party person, they hooked up and moved on.</p>
<p>Perhaps I have just not encountered these gullible victim females tricked into sex.</p>
<p>I think 07 makes a terrific point there. Even the phrase “he got me drunk” is ridiculous nowadays. One pictures a girl tied up in a chair with a funnel in her mouth, and alcohol being forced in. We all know that isn’t what is meant. What is meant is “he encouraged me to drink more”.</p>
<p>I agree unless it is spiked. That happens. I also agree that responsibilty should be shared by both gals and guys. Gals learn to say no and mean it, too. Guys learn to step back and not second guess. When you add their age, the party environment, I am not sure it’s a clear cut.</p>
<p>Yes of course, but spiked is something completely different. We don’t hear about someone secretly putting something extra into a drink, and then later the victim saying “he got me drunk”. At least I’ve never heard that. Most victims of such a secret drugging I’ve heard will say they don’t know what happened.
I certainly agree there can be dangers in drinking, but my comment was limited only to the “he got me drunk” comment, not to all dangers.</p>
<p>I can agree with Igloo though, that we all need to be responsible for our own behavior, and I agree about the not “second-guessing” too, but many will disagree on that point. Many will say if the guy feels the girl has had so much booze that she says “yes” to sex when she might have otherwise said “no”, then the guy should second guess her answer and choose “no”. It’s the old <em>I believe in equal rights, unless it puts me at a disadvantage</em> theme.</p>
<p>“The stats I’ve seen indicate that alcohol and/or drugs are part of the large majority of teen sex activity.”</p>
<p>Um, I think alcohol and/or drugs are part of quite a bit of adult sexual activity, too. I know my DH is more likely to get lucky if I have been drinking, lol!</p>
<p>“Basically, if a child results from a sexual encounter, the courts will determine what level of financial support you are to provide”</p>
<p>Right but it is based on the father’s income and it is appalling how little the courts award sometimes. In the case of a teenage father in school with no job, I have seen courts award $100 a month in child support. Ridiculous but it happens.</p>
<p>I had wondered about this. Do such moms tell their daughters that alcohol and sex mixes well when married, but is a “no no” when the sex occurs while not married?</p>
<p>BTW-- if the husband has sex with his wife “just for the pleasure of it,” has he
“used” the wife? If she is willing (and isn’t in the mood to have her own orgasm), has the husband still “used” the wife? If the wife “goes along” with this to please her man, what about her “self-esteem” issues?</p>
<p>Heck, I have two former BILs who were ordered to pay $100/mo in child support. Both were in their 20s and married to my sister when said children came into the world (and for a couple of years afterward).</p>
<p>I’m sorry–why is it ridiculous that a teen father should have to pay child support, even if he has no job? Money to support the child has to come from somewhere and it doesn’t seem unreasonable that at least some should come from the participating father. It could even serve as a deterrent for future activities, hopefully.</p>
<p>one aspect of your question(post 71) has been discussed, Himom a few pages back. It referred to whether or not it was fair for the woman to be permitted to make financial decisions not only for herself, but also for the male.</p>
<p>And for the age of consent, all states vary, and some have an age disparity clause.
But I think all here remember it used to be 14 in Georgia; everybody that remembers the Rob Lowe case should remember that.</p>
<p>“I’m sorry–why is it ridiculous that a teen father should have to pay child support, even if he has no job?” </p>
<p>Sorry my post was unclear. I wasn’t saying it was ridiculous that a teen father should have to pay child support. What I was saying is that it is ridiculous that the amount would be so low. What the heck will $100 a month pay for?</p>
<p>A teen father can switch to part time status at school and get a job to help support his child.</p>
<p>“And for the age of consent, all states vary, and some have an age disparity clause.
But I think all here remember it used to be 14 in Georgia; everybody that remembers the Rob Lowe case should remember that.”</p>
<p>I don’t remember the Rob Lowe case but now, the age of consent is 16 in Georgia. 18 yo sexing a 14 yo in Georgia is statutory rape but is a misdemeanor.</p>
<p>“Heck, I have two former BILs who were ordered to pay $100/mo in child support. Both were in their 20s and married to my sister when said children came into the world (and for a couple of years afterward).”</p>
<p>It really is amazing how little some courts will award in child support.</p>
<p>“I had wondered about this. Do such moms tell their daughters that alcohol and sex mixes well when married, but is a “no no” when the sex occurs while not married?”</p>
<p>My DD doesn’t drink but she does have sex. She will be 18 soon. I talked to her since she was young about sex and she came to me for birth control before she had sex.</p>
<p>“BTW-- if the husband has sex with his wife “just for the pleasure of it,” has he
“used” the wife? If she is willing (and isn’t in the mood to have her own orgasm), has the husband still “used” the wife? If the wife “goes along” with this to please her man, what about her “self-esteem” issues?”</p>
<p>Luckily I can sleep through it if I am not in the mood and it doesn’t seem to bother him. No self-esteem issues; I just realize he has a stronger libido than I do especially since he is younger than I am. Forget that stereotype about the older woman-younger man having better matched sex drives because it is not true. They are still for lack of a better word hornier than we are no matter what the age.</p>
<p>They are still for lack of a better word hornier than we are no matter what the age.</p>
<p>So not true.
I am still with my 1st husband- who mostly keeps up- & does pretty good for 55. Perhaps I should have married someone 15 years younger- although I got married when I was 23 ;)</p>
<p>OP-- you are a Canadian guy, right? You seem to indicate that your parents are together as a couple. It appears that whatever their view on teen sex, something has worked for them.</p>
<p>What aspect of their “liberal” view of sex seems out of step?</p>
<p>As this thread points out, there are US parents who counsel their child on issues of sex rather than attempt to “legislate” the child’s behavior.</p>