It’s a compliment that belongs to women but doesn’t degrade them… not that I’ve ever heard. I’d ask what’s objectionable about that, but it’d be a waste of time, because it’s clear the real issue is that it’s gender specific.
What an exceedingly dull world we look destined to live in.
I wonder it this would be considered sexist if the student who said it was female, and not male? Would it then have been acceptable?
Honestly, people who make a big deal over trivia like this are really annoying. It makes me think they have zero self esteem and need to whine about silly stuff. Really, who cares? Grow up and put on your big boy (make that big girl) pants.
I really resent it when I hear things like this, because I think much of the American public is sick and tired of hearing about the delicate flowers who are offended by every possible thing…and this is a big reason for the rise of someone who could be the top dog. Sadly. The problem is, when the pendulum swings too far one way, people react, and it goes the opposite direction. This does not pay off for most of us…so hey, thanks for nothing!
Now do you want me to tell you how I really feel? 
I don’t quite understand the concept of separation of personal vs professional life. They are all part of me. I do find sometimes when I bring up my personal life to my colleagues, especially my subordinates, I become more of a real personal to them and we have a much better working relationship.
Today I went on an exploratory interview (someone found me on Linkedin). I found out an interviewer was going to be late because he just had a baby. When he walked in, I congratulated him on his new born. He just beamed and we had a lovely discussion about his new baby before we went on to our professional discussion. If he was a woman and I was a man, would I have been perceived as sexist and not treated my interviewer with respect?
It’s in the eye of the beholder.
I seriously doubt that dean is lacking in self esteem.
" If he was a woman and I was a man, would I have been perceived as sexist and not treated my interviewer with respect?"
If it was a woman and she just had a baby, you wouldn’t be interviewing with her. 
In all seriousness, if you congratulated her on her baby, I’m sure no one would have an issue. If you asked her how she would be able to handle the responsibilities and stresses at work when she had kids to go home to at the end of the day, that IMO would be inappropriate (and yes, that comment was made to me by a male superior at work when I was being considered for a promotion based on my successes in my job at the time 8-| )
I agree with bclintonk #150. I don’t think that the Dean was being accorded due respect by the student introducing her, in a professional setting. Gravitas . . . it’s practically the antonym of vivacity.
I should say that my husband thinks that this is an issue of free speech, and that the student was totally within his rights, and need not apologize for anything. We disagree on issues of this type.
As a young faculty member, I once told a grad student that it was fine to refer to me by my first name. So a few days later, he saw me in the hallway with an older male faculty member, and said, “Hello, [FirstName]. Hello, Professor [LastName].” I did not say anything, but I don’t exactly have a poker face, and it seemed pretty awkward to me.
Women are more likely to be sensitive to small indications of a lack of respect, I think, because objectively we do have to worry about it for quite a few years in a professional career.
There’s some good stuff written in the article @HarvestMoon1 linked in post #130:
Here’s just a small fraction of it and it’s worthwhile reading the rest:
"There’s nowhere to go if conversations about prejudice are constantly derailed because folks (and the people defending them) refuse to brook any suggestion that they’ve done anything wrong.
"Before the inevitable media hit job sullied the reputation of the term “micro-aggression,” it was actually starting to do the work of opening the door for the conversation, “Hey, I know you weren’t being all Hitler-y, but that remark you didn’t realize was sexist was still derogatory so you should stop doing it.” "
“And that’s what the “vivacious” term was. No one suggested that Dean Rosenbury go “barefoot and pregnant,” but that doesn’t mean this didn’t contribute to demeaning her career and position to use a word commonly understood to describe an overeager sorority president.”
"I fear more people want to bristle at the “attack” on the student and professor than engage in a thoughtful discourse about what happened. "
This was a passing recognition of this woman’s good personality, likely out of respect and admiration, and the student is getting kicked in the teeth for it.
I mean, how dare he say anything that couldn’t be taken directly from her resume. The audacity of the sexist pig! 8-}
IME, colleagues and managers who mixed their personal and professional lives together in most professional workplaces ended up complicating both due to giving colleagues/supervisors extra information to use against them or because the blurring of the lines undermined their professionalism to the point it negatively affected their ability to do their jobs and avoid putting our employer in a bad light.
Personally, I find it much less complicated to separate my work and my personal life as much as possible. This way, neither has a chance to muck up the other to my detriment.
It’s also critical to preserving good friendships as the one instance when a friend ended up working with me on a short term job assignment, he later joked that while I made a great friend or a subordinate, he’d hate having me as a supervisor/boss because I tend to be a taskmaster when reports aren’t getting work tasks completed well in a timely manner.
@QuantMech Tell your husband that free speech doesn’t preclude consequences for one’s choice to say whatever they want. Then tell him to sleep on the couch. 
Albert, many women want to be recognized for their accomplishments, respected for their results, trusted for their competence, especially in situations where it’s their performance and role that matter and are being highlighted. I might call that a non-gendered approach (maybe someone has a better term.) That doesn’t mean we can’t acknowledge one is female, another is male. Afaiac, it doesn’t mean we can’t say so-and-so is attractive or that it’s a nice suit (men wear nice suits, too.) But you watch the context and the rest of the message.
There are times/contexts when we want to be treated as a valued contributor first, not have to go through the rigmarole of, “And hey, she’s a woman, too.” Or, “Hey, she’s so young” (or so old.) Some of the “small comments” inadvertently make that distinction, throw some shade. I’ve observed it done to others and how it can- again, maybe inadvertently- undercut authority.
“Sexist” usually implies discrimination (or raises the question.) But it also points to comments originating in the gender.
@ really resent it when I hear things like this, because I think much of the American public is sick and tired of hearing about the delicate flowers who are offended by every possible thing…and this is a big reason for the rise of someone who could be the top dog. Sadly. "
I think you meant to end with … Sad!
Seriously, I think you are right. That’s why there are memes about how the greatest generation battled the Nazis, stormed the beaches at Normandy, etc and today’s 18 yo’s are offended by minor word choices.
It looks EGREGIOUSLY thin-skinned and bullying for a person in high power to publicly go after a weak subordinate over something the subordinate intended as well meaning.
Where’s she excoriate him? The particular quote does name the role, “president of our law review,” but her words are an illustration, not an attack. Her full writing is a link off the Above the Law page. I think we’re all thin-sinned, at times.
Isn’t that pretty much the reaction second wave feminists of the 60’s/70’s encountered when they objected to being called “honey” and asked to fetch the coffee?
I think we need to make a distinction between on one hand needlessly pillorying people who make innocent mistakes and on the other objecting to those mistakes and educating those who make them.
True which is why hopefully someone in her organization will take her aside and explain her mis-steps. Clearly the student got the message albeit inappropriately.
The thing is, I haven’t seen any read evidence the law student was pilloried. All I’ve found is the NELR piece in which she describes being introduced as “young and vivacious” but does not ever accuse the student or his advisor of being sexist. Clearly she was not comfortable with the introduction, but other than mentioning the words used how is she attacking him? It all seems a tempest in a teapot. He said something mildly sexist, a year later she mentioned it in an essay about feminism, gender, and identity as seen through her lens as a law professor. Anyone who would harass him over it (if anyone has) is an idiot.
Many many years ago I remember having a conversation with a professor in the department in which I worked at Harvard in which she spoke of some of the challenges she encountered on the way up and how they had almost forced her out of the hard sciences. She was young, soft-spoken, and petite but with a razor-sharp intellect.
She had encountered some overt sexism of the “why are we wasting a space in the doctoral program on you when you’re just going to go out and have babies and quit” variety, but most people recognized those for what they were. What seemed emotionally harder to cope with were the little comments that assumed she was less focussed on her career than her male colleagues, such as the assumption that her career would take back seat to that of her husband, a post-doc in another field, or the casually sexist jokes some of the guys would make. The jokes weren’t directed at her but they still had an impact.
A couple of her fellow post-docs used to refer to her as “the little sister of the department”. They clearly meant it affectionately but she felt it undermined her authority with the undergraduates in the lab. Same with one of the guys who picked her up one time, commenting on how light she was. There were other similar incidents I can’t remember now. None of these were events to go ballistic over, but the cumulative result was discouraging and she felt if she commented on them she would be labeled as oversensitive.
I believe things have improved and a that female student on the same career path would meet with fewer hidden obstacle than she did but some of the reason for the improvement is that women have quietly, and sometimes not so quietly, called out these kinds of behaviors.
I’ve worked directly for 3 women who have made the Fortune or Forbes lists of most powerful / influential women. They have all been advocates for using women’s talent, including creating women’s networks, and don’t engage in this silly nonsense of getting all worked up over trivialities like this. You can win the battle but lose the war by squandering capital on this.
lol, doschicos, #170! I have not yet pointed out that one doesn’t normally need to invoke one’s First Amendment rights when giving an introduction that is supposed to be complimentary!