<p>Not even sure what you’re talking about, sally, I don’t think you know me at all. I guess he just lost me immediately with calling himself a “ladies man”. But I’m not trying to be controversial, I was just making a comment, didn’t think it would be a big deal. Shouldn’t have disagreed with the crowd in the first place, I guess.</p>
<p>I just wish I had known him. I love natty dressers.</p>
<p>Wow, sally, don’t you think you are over-reaching with your comments?</p>
<p>While I don’t agree with busdriver on this topic (the obit), I feel the need to defend her right to express her opinion without being attacked (not that she cannot defend herself).</p>
<p>I don’t think busdriver was offended that the deceased wanted to see Hillary Clinton as President.</p>
<p>You’re right, zoosermom. I’m actually a HC fan anyways, being compelled to adore strong women. I just read this obit and it reminded me so much of what my dad will write. I will try to post it here, though I suspect he will outlive me. And it will be a groaner.</p>
<p>I got a huge kick out of the obituary because it was so personal. I’ve never seen one before that referenced things that the decedent didn’t like. I could really have fun writing something like that. The shame is that he is dead and doesn’t get to see the reaction.</p>
<p>I love it! What a wonderful, witty tribute to a great father; I feel as though those of us who didn’t know him missed something.</p>
<p>Thanks for posting it, zm.</p>
<p>I was not trying to attack busdriver. I just think we should show a little respect for the dead, and for those who are grieving. Not that the family will read this thread, but still.</p>
<p>I suspect that this gentleman was not particularly sanctimonious and would not be offended by some random stranger commenting on his obit. He probably would have been quite entertained by the publicity it received. I also suspect that he would have encouraged his family to celebrate his long life and not spend much time grieving. Just a guess.</p>
<p>Lordy, I don’t see any disrespect for the dead here. And even though I found the obituary rather charming, I sure don’t mind hearing other opinions (lots of times I’m the one out of step), and I remind myself not to make hasty assumptions of why someone thinks what he or she does. It’s too easy to be wrong.</p>
<p>Obviously he was very well loved. Very nice.</p>
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<p>If he’d written it himself, and had been bragging about all his girlfriends, I would probably feel the same way. But I thought it was kind of cute that his daughter described him that way, and was referring to his mother, wife, sister, niece, and daughters.</p>
<p>^yes, exactly! That–as it played out–was adorable.</p>
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<p>If this is bragging, it’s the most self-effacing bragging I’ve ever read. These two paragraphs - bragging about wearing Fruit of the Loom t-shirts? really? - are up front, while buried in the last paragraph is the brief mention, with no elaboration, that he was the dean of the campus of the community college.</p>
<p>DonnaL and hayden: exactly. </p>
<p>This article has a photo of him and his wife, and does a nice job describing the (almost) lost art of the obituary.</p>
<p>[The</a> art of the obituary: Not dead yet](<a href=“http://news.msn.com/pop-culture/the-art-of-the-obituary-not-dead-yet]The”>http://news.msn.com/pop-culture/the-art-of-the-obituary-not-dead-yet)</p>
<p>Actually, hayden, (and I’m not intending to enrage sally again), it’s funny…as those two paragraphs are representative of good old PNW style bragging. The rest of the obit, not too much. Now I really do think most of it is funny and sweet, but those paragraphs you picked out are very representative of the type of bragging that is most likely a regional thing. I realize that Harry was from the south, so it would probably be considered as being self depreciating.</p>
<p>People from this area will know exactly what I’m talking about. Oh, so you’re wearing jeans to the show? Well look, mine have holes in them, and they’re dirty too. I just realized my dog might have peed on them. You like my outfit? Well, I got it for $2 at Value Village. You think your car is battered? Look at all the scrapes on mine, and it’s older, too! You stayed in a cheap hotel? Well, I slept in a tent, or my car. Better yet, I just huddled next to a rock on top of my backpack.</p>
<p>We don’t brag about wealth or possessions, but we really like talking about this sort of thing. I’m sure you have no idea what I’m talking about, and I’m not trying to be controversial, but this is probably why some of the obit appears different to me than it would to you.</p>
<p>As you say, bus driver, he was born and lived in the south, so what you’re used to in the PNW doesn’t really apply. I grew up in the south and really loved the obit. It sounded like funny, affectionate things his daughters had been teasing him about all their lives. Especially the remark about their being spoiled for life as a result of getting the lake view at campgrounds with their popup. </p>
<p>Check out the picture of him in the link sally405 posted and see if he looks pretentious or bragging.</p>
<p>You’re right, hayden, it is definitely different. I’ve lived in the south too, where it seemed that many people were totally dressed up and if you weren’t, you just might get ignored. Around here, you might think that old guy in the t-shirt and sweats is homeless, but he just might be a billionaire. Same country, completely different attitudes.</p>
<p>I reread the obit to see what I saw that others didn’t, and I really did find it funnier and sweeter the second time around.</p>
<p>busdriver, you are not (and never were) enraging me. And I owe you an apology for speculating about your negative reaction to the obit. I unfortunately based my thinking on previous interactions about subjects that had veered into political territory. I shouldn’t have done that.</p>
<p>I am not from the PNW but I live in an area with plenty of pretentious (or “ironic”) hipsters, which seems to be what you are describing–I know the kind well. And yes, such people can be insufferable–especially those who are smug and condescending to those who are not as “righteous” as they are. In any case, I HAVE spent a considerable amount of time in Mississippi and have been to many of the places mentioned in the piece. I still have strong family ties to the south and close friends who live where I do (midwest) who are from places like Long Beach. Harry’s story struck a chord with me both for the character that came through in the writing as well as the sadness I felt over not knowing if I could write such a tribute for anyone I know.</p>
<p>Okay, sally we are at peace, I’m glad you’re not angry at me. I actually am quite moderate, disliking most all politicians, and distrusting every last one of them. I suspect that you could write a tribute like that for someone you knew well and loved…of course only a certain type of personality would appreciate it.</p>