<p>NewMassDad,
My intent is not to “attack” you but to respond to what frankly really surprised me in your post because I have known you a long while on CC and have respected you and found your post today rather shocking because it was from you. I feel that your post was a gross generalization about a group of people (students at Ivies) and I do have a D who belongs to that group. It appeared to ME, that you WERE talking about ALL, not some, and then making assumptions about those who attend Ivies. Since your assumptions did not fit my own kid’s situation and I can ONLY talk of my own kid, I felt compelled to respond. </p>
<p>You wrote:
“IMHO, the main reason folks seek educations at some places is for the NAME. And that they get.”</p>
<p>You did not say “some folks.” I only know that MY kid did NOT pick her school based on its name. She was the antithesis of someone who only wanted an Ivy. I already explained that she was going to pick Tufts and Smith over her acceptance to Penn. She never cared about her school being an IVY whatsoever. She had specific things she wanted in a college. SOME of these were…(and this is why her ultimate choice is a good fit) being on the East Coast and not far from skiing, near a city, medium sized, very challenging academic environment with a motivated student body, availability of an architecture major in a liberal arts curriculum, study abroad opportunities, general feel for fitting in, a ski team at either the club or varsity level (would have done club but since she did get into Brown and it is a varsity team, it was even more attractive as only 2 of her schools had a varsity team…Brown and Smith), and she liked the open curriculum at Brown (Smith had that too) and the emphasis on independence such as independent studies or guiding one’s own learning, Brown had connection with RISD (is on second RISD course so far), availability of club soccer and tennis, dance, theater, music, and I am forgetting what else at the moment as it has been two years and I have gone through this with another kid since then. She wanted a “good college” but prestige is not her thing and in fact, she is someone who almost goes out of her way to be overly modest and not let on that she even goes to an Ivy…in fact, nobody in her entire graduating class went to one. </p>
<p>You also wrote:
" let us all thank the Ivies for providing a place where the seekers of status and privelidge can hang out for four years, while the kids who really want an education can head to the Reeds, the Oberlins, the Chicagos and many others to learn with fewer distractions."</p>
<p>Now you are saying that you never said ALL kids at Ivies were seekers of status and priviledge, and that you hit some raw nerve but the way I interpret the above statement was that Ivies were where seekers of status end up and that anyone who really wants to learn or get an education ends up at schools like Reed, Oberlin or UChicago. It seems to ME, that this WAS a generalization about those who attend Ivies, and not any “some” or exceptions. The opposite, therefore, that I would infer from your statement is that those who go to Ivies do not seek an education or so much want to learn but are more motivated by prestige and priviledge (oy, my kid is on financial aid no less). That was the inverse of your saying “while the kids who want an education go to blah blah.”</p>
<p>In a later post you wrote:</p>
<p>"I do not know wy a regular poster like soozievt needs to drag in what my own family did several years ago, other than as some backhanded way of attacking the credibility of a posting that did not even say what she accuses it of saying. Nonetheless, for the record I will clarify that my own D did in fact apply to some schools that were closer to home than the one she ultimately ended up attending. I suppose it stretches credibility of some readers to think that geography influenced her applications. </p>
<p>These flames are just one more reminder of why it is so important to protect our identities here. One never knows how past postings will be used out of context in some sort of attack."</p>
<p>In no way was my intent to attack your credibility. Rather, I am just very surprised that a parent of a student who actually applied to Ivy league schools, even including an EA one, would later poo poo Ivies. It is NO secret that I revealed as you have posted on here for years and about your D’s admissions’ process. I am reflecting that I simply do not understand the put down of Ivies or those who choose to attend, from someone who applied or had a child apply in the first place. I understand if geography was her reason. You don’t even have to give me her reason as I don’t frown upon her ONE bit. I admire your daughter. I even posted the other day congrats on her recent award! You need not worry about protecting her from me because I have no ax to grind or no intent of attacking someone. My point was to explain as a parent of an Ivy student that she did not fit into the broad brush stroke you painted whatsoever. I particularly don’t understand your comments given that your own kid was an applicant, though happened to land at a school of her choosing, UChicago. My D might have just as easily landed at Tufts rather than Brown because until mid April she wasn’t sure. She might have picked Tufts. Then Brown had a few things to offer that were more appealing, the ski team being one of them, plus several other things. She didn’t think Brown was BETTER but just favored some things about it more in terms of fit and the feel she got at the accepted student event. In fact, ironically she had come full circle from the beginning of junior year in high school flipping through fat college directories and the first school that popped out as really “just right” was Brown. Brown was not her top favorite for a long time. During winter of senior year, Brown moved into a three way tie for favorite with Tufts and Yale. As I said, she preferred Tufts and Smith over Penn. If she was a prestige seeker, then she’d be odd to pick Tufts or Smith over Penn in many folks’s eyes.</p>
<p>Are there prestige seekers out there? YES…I read students on CC all the time that have an “Ivy or bust” mentality and apply to all 8 Ivies even. Would I call a UChicago student a prestige seeker even though that is a top school? Nope. I think kids who go there are a certain fit and of course, very bright as well. I don’t really think your D is that different than mine or lots of kids represented in this thread. They sought challenging learning environments that fit their personalities and preferences. Your D did and so did mine and lots of others. I don’t understand the negativity toward Ivies but particularly coming from someone who had a child apply to Ivies, geography or no geography. She was from Boston and it is not like she applied to Simmons or Endicott, right? </p>
<p>I think highly of your accomplished daughter who loves to learn and seeks a fine education. I don’t mean ANY attack. I only felt a desire to not be lumped into your attack about others such as my D and so mentioned her case not fitting into your generalization, thank you. I think you have to know by now that I am not an attacking sort of poster. The raw nerve you think you hit was not my feeling of defending something that identified some truth but more that it was so OPPOSITE from my reality in my family that I spoke up. You have no need to worry about your D’s identity as I have no attack meant or intended. Bringing up that she applied to Ivies is not to discredit but to explain WHY I completely found your remarks today so out of character from what you have written in the past. I have read some other parents on CC who have had kids apply to Ivies and then their kids did not end up at one who also later poo pooed Ivies. I simply don’t quite get it. I also read kids and parents after rejections come who put down the college from where they were rejected and I don’t get that either because they applied in the first place so must have had SOME interest in attending. </p>
<p>If you saw an attack in anything I wrote, forgive me as that is not my intent. Some have read your statements as an attack on them because they belong to the group of people about whom you made generalized statements that were interpretted as ALL, and not read as “some”. </p>
<p>Also, the poo pooing of adjuncts, I do have feelings about because I have been an adjunct on the undergraduate and graduate level. I hardly pity my students who have had me and doubt they received something so inferior or fraudulent.</p>